Why do people not invest on their minds?
Are they missing out on their personal development?
When you go out and about, if you live in a big city, you will notice rows and rows of hair salons, beauty parlours, nail parlours, gyms, membership clubs (for golfers, tennis, swimmers, etc.), restaurants, cinemas, nightclubs (not that there is anything wrong in enjoying a night out every now and then!), theatres, aesthetic clinics (which aren’t cheap!), shopping centres, etc.; I could go on and on if I wanted to, I hope I am starting to paint the picture for you here.
I am not going to deny I have been, in fact still am, guilty of going to these tempting places where you have the potential to work on your “social skills and life”, work on your body or against it (the choice is ours normally, don’t think anyone makes us!), we make ourselves look more attractive (externally); we even go to extremes to “feel” better about ourselves!
I was a confessed shop-aholic, until I discovered my shopping strategy (so I am saving lots and lots of money now); I still to this date invest in my well-being by going to the gym and eating the good stuff (I must confess I can be naughty at times too!), and working in an aesthetic clinic (best in the UK btw!) I too have had some treatments to make my looks last longer (preventative measures these are J); so I totally get why people do it.
However, not many of these places offer a good solution to peoples’ problems.
We live in a society, where unfortunately we want everything yesterday, today is too late, that instant gratification has become our worst enemy.
In my personal and humble opinion, I have noticed that people do not know enough about personal development and what it can do for them.
Before I go on (which I can do!), I would like to tell you a little about me.
I have been in personal development more than half my life. When I was a teenager I thought life was against me – I wore the biggest “victim” t-shirt going, I honestly thought I was doomed and my life would end up pretty bad!
For some strange reason, I was fascinated and mesmerised by science (for a good Catholic boy, anyway); so, I would do my best to find answers, I needed that empirical evidence that something was real or not, before I could make my mind up about something or anything.
This led me to read books (and I still do, loooove my books), I knew, in my heart, that I could overcome the obstacles I was facing, being a Catholic gay boy in a very macho society isn’t really ideal; so, my search continued…
I was the president of a local library, at this time I was fortunate to have come across a private library that had been donated to the library, as the president I was given the task to go through the books and choose the ones that were fit for the library and the rest, well I could either take them or they would have been thrown away (I can’t believe people throw books away!).
Among these books, there were hundreds of titles that grabbed my attention, filled my heart with hope and sounded like the solution to my problems (they ones I thought I had!), many of the titles were self-help book, DIY books essentially, I read some of them and found them pointless, others where OK, but one never left my mind, this book was The Unlimited Power by Tony Robbins (the then Anthony Robbins), this book blew my mind away, and allowed me to see what was possible not only with NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) and personal development.
It is fair to say that I, too, have been touched by Tony Robbins’ inspiration, like many other millions around the globe.
Now, going back to the subject at hand, I have noticed that most people think or imagine that personal development either doesn’t “work”, is too “expensive”, is for “gifted” people, is for “rich” people, is for the “chosen” ones, is not “fast” enough, etc., the list could go on.
The truth is, personal development is part of us, of our “journey”, part of our “evolution”, our birthright, is finding the truth of who we are, as put by Campbell: it is our Hero’s Journey.
Personal development gives us the opportunity to work on the most important “muscle” we possess, our brain, our mind, which rules over and controls everything we do, the decisions we make, the actions we take or not, the movements we do, the thoughts we have, the creative moments we have, the positive or negative self-talk, and much more.
For those who are fans of the gym, the more you use a muscle the bigger it gets, simple! The mind is that muscle, we take for granted, many people around the world only exercise it till they go to college or University, after that, well – the usage is very low and limited, just take a look around you, do you think that all the violence, fear, anger and negativity portrayed by the media is showing people who use their minds and brains effectively and for the highest good of humanity, of course not!
When you embark in the world of personal development is like stepping in a fantasy land, you discover that absolutely anything is possible if you set your mind to it and it is in alignment with your values and heart’s desires.
If you are an athlete or gymgoer, or if you have a business or have a senior position at work; whether you are “young” or “old”, the more you work on yourself (i.e. your mind, aka, you mindset) and capabilities the better you do at sport, the more you are recognised at work and the result (I like to call this the bonus track, by the way), life just gets easier.
You see, when you learn that in life there are two options you either act or react, in a nutshell, you either do it or you don’t.
In personal development you learn that you are in control, you are the captain of your ship, you are the CEO of your life and whether something happens or not, it is your call, you call the shots, no one else.
The more you work on yourself, the more you work on your mind the better you get, the better your results, the better your life.
When people go to the hair salon, or beautician, if they aren’t working on themselves it would NOT matter how much money they spend on themselves or how good they look, if they don’t work on the deep stuff, if they don’t work on their minds, those exterior things will make no difference, it will only be a temporary mask or cover up.
If you go to the gym, or if you are dieting, if you don’t work on your emotions or your mind, the results you get will be momentary and you might find yourself going back to square zero, yo-yo dieting, and guess what? That money will have been wasted.
This, does NOT happen in personal development, it is all an investment!
Dining out, going for a walk, dancing till the sun comes out, if you aren’t working on yourself are forms of escapism, and it will not matter how much you try and how many times you go out, each and every time you go back home or back to work, you will be facing the same reality, nothing will change until you do something about it.
As said, I enjoy those things mentioned earlier, I have a personal trainer, I like to look after myself, I love going out, like many of us do; though, I understand that in order to get results at the gym, in life or in general, I must work on the most important asset I possess, my mind.
Without personal development, doing all the things I do, would be like shooting an arrow without a goal, arrows would be shot aimlessly and someone could be hurt.
Just think, how many times have you acted without thinking, and has anyone around you been hurt?
On the contrary, when you have thought things through, have you felt the difference?
Personal development isn’t expensive, if the next door Latino neighbour (oh, by the way, I am from Panama) can afford it, anyone can afford it, I mean it anyone!
Once I attended a seminar, which totally revolutionised my life, here the coach said something I will never ever in a billion years forget, he said: when you truly want something, anything in life, you will find the money, time and energy to make it happen.
OMG, I saw the light. At that moment I had been in the personal development world for over a decade and this was it!
You see, real change doesn’t happen overnight, it takes time, it is like a bank account, the more you add to it the better and bigger the interest, in this case the interest is a better life, a life of possibilities and options.
You needn’t be afraid, you needn’t be worried, if you want to be a better person, get to work, but work on yourself and your mind.
I have noticed and experienced that people are afraid or fearful of their own success, or change, or not being liked anymore; the truth is, who cares.
Truth be told, in personal development you DO NOT change a thing, you simply are a better version of yourself.
When you are in a better place or better frame of mind you learn that the only opinion that really matters is that you have about yourself, the way you see yourself.
What are you waiting for?
If you want to achieve a goal or make your dreams come true get working, right now.
I recommend a great book, by this awesome chap Jorge Vence (wait a minute, that’s me!), in his book entitled Growing Confident he shares his story with the reader, worth your read, and packed with some useful tips and exercises to get you going in your personal development journey.
Or, if you want to get things going and are really really serious about your development as a person and committed to yourself, contact me, and let’s have a 30-minutes free consultation to see where you want to be and how we can make it happen. Yes, I will take you by the hand and help you get to where you want to be. How cool is that?
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Till next time.
With all my love,
From my heart to yours,