Living In Love
After years of thinking that I was not entitled to love and happiness; I “woke up” from that nightmare to find out that I was worth every ounce of love I found my way.
When I “woke up” form this imaginary nightmare (truth be told, this was created in my head and stayed there until I decided to free myself from this unwanted way of thinking) things started to align themselves in my life.
As you probably are aware (and as briefly touched on yesterday) by The Law of Attraction we attract into our lives what we think about.
During my teenage years when I thought the world was against me (it felt that way, anyway!) all I attracted was sadness, hurt, unhappiness and disappointment.
Ok, let’s not forget that I had to come to terms with the fact I was gay and it took me a wee while to accept myself (more of that in another episode – I promise it won’t disappoint!).
So, months after I came to terms with being gay things changed in my life, in my head and in me.
For the first time in those 16 years at the time I felt sort of “comfortable” in my own skin, I felt like I had a voice and a purpose.
Yes, things were still “challenging” but they were easier.
After months of therapy and psychotherapy I was learning about myself and the world; my black and white life was starting to fill up with colour, things were changing around me and I was, for once, in charge of my life.
One day (which I remember like it was yesterday) I was out celebrating my graduation from college with a friend, who took me under his wing and looked after me like a younger brother, and this day my life changed forever.
This night, the 30th of December 2000 I met the man that not only swept me off my feet but gave me so much love I didn’t even know was possible to receive.
Life till that very moment had had its ups and downs, moments of happiness and others not so happy, moments when I wished I wasn’t here any longer and others when I felt I was here for some “reason”.
Though, the day I met this gentleman many things became clearer, I realised I was allowed and I deserved love, I was worth being loved, it didn’t matter what had happened before that day, all those times my heart had been broken, the times love laughed at me, the times I had to glue my heart together, all of that didn’t matter that day (or any after that moment!).
When I looked into his eyes I saw life, I felt alive and I learned that life was worth fighting for when you have someone who loved you more than you love yourself.
This very day, I thought that whatever had happened beforehand was all but a mirage because my “real” life was just about to start.
Although, I know it sounds quite “fairy-taley”, what I am trying to exemplify here is that when we change the way we think about the world and ourselves, when we turn our back on the negative and focus on the positive life really begins.
As mentioned in my book Growing Confident, and truth be told (hand on heart – I totally promise – scouts honour!), I hadn’t realised that upon changing my “mindset” (BTW this happened on the 28th of March 2000 after an OD), 9 months post that I found love (and life again) and 2 years post meeting my love (at the time) I found myself moving to England.
Also, everything post that 28th of March has been almost magical because I learned to focus on life and love and things that allowed me to become a better person.
Love has truly been the reason I am here sharing my story with the world and helping my clients and students to become better versions of themselves and create a ripple effect around them, so everyone they meet and touch benefits from that change in them and their lives.
During this time I have also learned that love truly is endless when you learn to love and accept yourself no matter what, sometimes it takes someone else to make us realise we are worth all the love in the world.
It truly is a journey when you learn to love yourself, when you shift your mindset and the direct by-product of this process is the life you always wanted.
Love, live, love, live, live in love, and love while living is my mantra.
Have you told someone you love them recently?
Have you told yourself you love yourself lately?
What about showing acts of love on a daily basis?
Whose life can you touch with love?
I hope you have enjoyed this blog post and please share with people you know and those who might need that tiny weeny bit of love in their lives.
Remember there’s plenty to go round (I have got plenty to give).
With all my love (and I mean it!).
From my heart to yours,