How To Be You!
I have to admit this it my favourite title for a blog yet!
How to be you?
My answer would be very simple and to the point:
The best way to be YOU is not to be like OR act like anyone else!
It is at this point that things get a bit “tricky” and people get confused, often I hear things like:
• I don’t have a personality,
• I don’t know how to be “me”,
• I don’t know who I want to be,
• I don’t have a role model,
• I don’t look like such and such, etc.
The list of reasons or excuses to be some else outweigh the reasons to be oneself.
So, how can you be you?
(I got to admit this is a great question, too! – I think I will be using it a lot from now on!)
The answer from everyone would be unique and personal to each person, so here is MY answer, this when I learn how I could be me.
The first thing I did was to make a list of the things I wasn’t: I wasn’t an athlete nor into sports, I wasn’t a singer (seriously, my singing is deafening!), I wasn’t an answer (how can someone have 2 left feet, it is a mystery!), I wasn’t blond, I wasn’t tall, I wasn’t short, I wasn’t a genius, I wasn’t wealthy.
This gave an idea (by elimination) of what my personality/identity was like.
Then, I made another list of the things I didn’t want to be: I didn’t want to be lazy, I didn’t want to be obese, I didn’t want to be unhealthy, I didn’t want to be unfit, I didn’t want to be “just another person in the crowd”, I didn’t want to be a victim, I didn’t want to be a bad person.
Again, this list gave me an idea of what I might want to be as a person, which direction to take in order to be the person I didn’t know how to be.
I asked myself: what excites you; I loved cooking (still do and I became a chef), I loved learning (my self-education is the best gift I have given myself by far!), I loved teaching and simplifying things for others (I have become a trainer to share my passion with others), I loved fiction and poetry (I have published my poems and recited them in public, written non-fiction and just started writing my first fiction book!), I loved crystals and gems (I am mineral collector and crystal healer), I loved the mind (I am now a therapist and coach), I loved talking to people (I help people through my work as a coach), I loved helping people (I do that through ALL of my work!).
ALL of the things that excited me when I started my personal development journey are very much part of what I do in my work, they excited me and I found a way to align my joy and excitement with my personality and career.
Lastly, I asked myself: what is the one thing you would like to accomplish in life? It took me a while to answer this question as I had to sit with it, when it came, this is what I came up with: what I want to accomplish in life is that every single person I get in contact with is awakened to their potential, so they leave their reasons behind and they start creating the life of their dreams, achieving abundance, joy, laughter, love and total happiness. A bit unambitious, I know!
That is the moment I discovered I wanted to be of help to others, empower them and create victors who forget excuses and remember reasons to be amazing and reasons to do instead of not to do.
I learned that the person I had to be was someone big, bold, courageous, brave, a go getter, powerful, strong and committed. I was sold!
I wanted to be that person, I fell in love with the idea of being strong! I grew up “thinking” I was the runt of the litter! I had all the reasons to give up on my dreams and life, yet I didn’t because I found the idea of being all of these amazing things more powerful than being a runt of a litter or a victim!
A list of qualities, characteristics and attributes stood in front of me and I got busy becoming ALL of these things AND I found ways to become ALL of them.
I became a confidence and success coach and having confidence opens all these doors to so many but I had to start with myself, so I could tell the tale to others, like I am doing right now.
To be you, you have to be honest and transparent with yourself, the truth is not many people give two flying f*cks, I used to hold myself back because of what others might think.
When I put two and two together and I got much more than 4, I got common sense; people would only care about things for minutes, hours or days at the very maximum, after that they’d forget about it ALL, because they also have their own inner stuff, battles or sh*t that keep them preoccupied.
Discovering how to be you is a journey that you MUST be willing to embark on and learn what hasn’t been learn, grow muscles and attitudes you haven’t yet, study and learn skills that haven’t been learned, leave the unwanted/unnecessary behind, search for what’s needed instead of what you think might be wanted.
Becoming you is learning about yourself, what makes you tick and what triggers you (trust me on the last one!!!), it is about learning to communicate effectively (I learn something new on this subject daily!), it is about being honest with yourself and your intentions and quite frankly it isn’t about you either, it is about others!
How to be you can only be learned by you, others might be able to help you but ultimately it is up to YOU whether you become a “copycat” or an unique print of yourself!
To be you, you mustn’t be someone else, you ought to discover who you are by embarking on a journey of self-discovery learning what hasn’t been learned AND putting what you learn into practice, aligning your passions, what you love and excite you with how you can help others.
Being authentic, genuine and original makes so much more sense when others benefit from it, and the more people you help the greater the rewards you reap.
Thank you so much for reading today’s post and please share with your friends and family.
With all my love,