How Much Can A Conversation Help You?

We love to talk and have a conversation with everyone around us, these connect us and can be healing too, for all those involved.

Though, in my personal experience and that of my clients, family and friends we just talk about the superficial stuff and take everything else for granted OR we think others won’t care.

I used to withhold and be shallow and superficial in my conversations, they didn’t take me far and almost cost me my life.

I felt alone, lonely, unwanted and a burden to my family and society, but everyone thought I was fine and just another moody teenager.

The day after my suicide attempt that withholding stopped and I opened up, I spoke to someone about my life and how I felt.

That conversation without a shadow of a doubt saved my life, I learned people cared and they’d do whatever they can to help… all that is needed is for us to open up.

Why am I going on about this?

This year I have made myself the commitment to be there for everyone I know and to make new friends.

Today a friend phoned me and asked me round so I went and we had such a great conversation that lasted for hours.

What was great about this conversation was the generosity and honesty of every word spoken, we just had a real and open conversation.

We didn’t pretend to be anyone else but ourselves, we didn’t have to mind our every word and openly would disagree with each other without arguing about it.

That honesty and openness opened a gate of compliments and kindness and love that you don’t see every day.

Here is what we fail to do in our conversations, we are (or can be) very stingy and inauthentic… these create blockages and barriers that stop the real communication and there is almost no real content to it all.

It was a great reminder of the magic that takes place when we openly, honestly and humanly talk to another person AND the connection it strengthens, and the feeling afterwards is so rewarding.

Talking about ourselves can be scary and awkward at first but over time it gets easier to openly talk about what is worrying us and our concerns, and problems.

I invite you to have more open and honest conversations with your loved ones, and please let me know how these enrich your lives. Give it a go.

Till next time, with all my love,

Jorge

5 Lessons Learned From Watching Molly’s Game

5 Lessons Learned From Watching Molly’s Game


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These days it is almost essential to have a way to unwind and forget about stress or worries, just for a short while anyway.

Some of us are quite sneaky and savvy and take this unwinding period and get the most from it.

Remember you either go through your day or get from the day. I know what I’d much rather do…

As you will know I am a coach, trainer, author, poet, healer, chef, entrepreneur and I love learning; some would say I never switch off!

Some people say/ask how do they even relate?

They have two things in common me and Energy; Energy is in EVERYTHING and it is what makes things come together, make sense and materialise them before our own eyes.

So, on New Year’s day my partner and I went to the movies to watch Molly’s Game, I was expecting just another film with a bit of action here and there and when you stripped all the good bits away you’d end up with nothing.

Truth be told because of my vivid and wild imagination I find movies predictable, boring and quite frankly marketing vehicles where we all can see who is sponsoring the movie!!!

Boy meets girl, fights enemy, wins or loses and the end… Joseph Campbell’s The Hero’s Journey, story telling, novel writing 101…! – No sarcasm intended I promise! – OK, maybe a little.

My expectations were pretty low, I just fancied a nice time with my other half welcoming 2018 romantically and calmly.

But boy I was not expecting to get so many life lessons from that movie.

Here are the 5 lessons learned from watching Molly’s Game

1. We are too quick to judge our parents: Without going into too many details as to what happens in the movie, Molly’s relationship with her dad was far from ideal, leading to a broken relationship in her adult life, what she doesn’t know is that her dad always loved her and he was too ashamed of himself and what he had done in the past. We often judge our parents and create a story in our heads as to why they are the way they are, we buy into this story and we don’t let go of it. Parents are humans too and they do the best they can with the resources available to them. Let’s be kind to them (this includes me too!)!
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2. It only takes one second to change the course of our lives (for the better or for the worse!): Molly by many people’s standard was a bright kid with everything going for her, though one accident made her decide to take a year off and head to LA, there she meets someone who’d introduce her a life and lifestyle she’d soon become addicted to, getting deeper and deeper into an abyss of greed, luxuxy and a life many of us would consider impossible, yet she orchestrated it and created it herself from scratch, bringing to life the ideal fantasy for powerful men. Had that accident never happened, how would her life be different?
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3. Intelligence and potential does no equal success: it is hard to believe that someone bright, sharp and with the world at their feet would jeopardise it all by going in the opposite direction, sadly we all know that that is not the case. I have seen it in my life and with many of my clients, we seem to have it all set for us and events AND our sense of unworthiness sabotage it, and unavoidably we end up further away from where we were expected to be by ourselves and others. This reminds me something one of my tutors from college said to me once: real intelligence is not what you know but how you apply what you know.
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4. It is one belief or decision that shapes our lives and destiny: there is a powerful moment in the movie (I say powerful as it almost reduced me to tears!) where Molly is met by her dad and they had a long overdued conversation. Here her dad who in the movie is a psychologist says Molly you are addicted to the power over powerful men, that’s why you do what you do. Incredibly powerful statement and insight as to why she did what she did, loving the feeling of being in control and being powerful over the most influential and powerful men in the world, just because she wanted to prove to her dad she was powerful too! Awareness doesn’t get any better than this. One belief, one decision that drives to do unthinkable and crazy stuff without us being fully aware of it.

5. To wake up from our carelessness and destructive behaviours something bad has to happen: as crazy as it may sound we let things go further than they should. In the movie there are two scenes that were her wake-up call; the first one is when she gets a beating for not liaising with some gangsters and the second when the FBI gets involved! I know these are extreme cases but when we look around us people’s lives are transformed and shaped by violence, crime, abuse, drugs, alcohol, bullying. I have known of people who had to be arrested to start a ‘new life’, the death of a child or parent, illness and disease, it doesn’t matter how big or small it may appear to us but these pivotal moments have the leverage to force us to make new decisions.
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In conclusion 

I thoroughly enjoyed watching the movie and I felt I was the viewer who got away with all the good stuff. I felt truly blessed to have watched this movie and take this as a warning of how things can turn out IF I don’t stay on course or IF I don’t seek the help I need or IF I don’t get the support I need.

As Jim Rohn used to say there are two types of stories:
• Stories of success and inspiration, and
• Warnings: DO NOT DO THIS!!!

Surprisongly in Molly’s case her story is a bit of both: it is a warning and it is a success, waking up on time and turning her life around and sharing it with the world.

If you get the chance go and watch this movie and see it as more than a movie, well it is more than a movie as it is based on a true story and I believe she has been kind enough to share it with us.

I saw areas of my life in which I have been careless and now I can rectify them and stay on course, carry on with my purpose and continue to inspire others.

This is it for today. Carry on being awesome.

Before we say goodbay (for today) follow my blog and subscribe to my newsletter, too.

Have a sensational day.

With all my love,

Jorge

Once Upon A Time…

Once Upon A Time…

Once upon a time there was a very kind deity that gave all of his creation a whole new start.

Their lives started afresh and hope was renewed.

These beings (who totally underestimated what they were capable of) were given new opportunities annually.

365 days, composed of 52 weeks, 12 months, 8760 hours, 525600 minutes and 31536000 seconds filled with so much energy and all the required ingredients to make any of these beings successful and fulfilled beyond their wildest dreams and imagination.

At midnight where the old and the new year met and changed their course billions of these beings would make promises, cast wishes and would swear the year ahead would be their best ever.

Here is where the twists and turns of this story begin…

These beings would celebrate drinking the nectar of decay to numb themselves from the year past, their consciousness would be wiped out and all of their abilities would be compromised.

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Cheers and cries of both sadness and joy would be heard, a false sense of safety, connection and hope would be felt, beings from all over the place would gather and witness how the years crossed and changed their directions.

Old and young, males and females, educated and uneducated would stand side by side and start the countdown…

5, 4, 3, 2, 1…

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

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The cheer and joy would be contagious.

Oh I love you man, this is your year I know it, I can feel it, no man this is our year, we have worked so hard and it is only fair.

The drinking of this nectar would continue, it was such a profitable business for its distributor.

Other more ‘sophisticated’ or wealthier or sillier beings would even purchase other substances to heightened their joy and euphoria and welcome the new year in a real ‘high’.

This gathering, party of the new year would last for many hours and even days if the time of the week allowed it.

So…

The first day of the year, at the very beginning of this new era of hope, the WHOLE planet would be unconscious, wasted and numbed, the false illusion of certainty would have them helpless in what could be the most important day of their lives.

A day becomes 2 days and 3 and 4 days and next thing the ‘mañana’ syndrome starts to spread.

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I will do it in a minute, this minute’s life span seems to break all the laws of the universe as it gets longer and longer and longer and nothing gets done, the task is ‘brushed under the carpet’ and they start to doubt themselves.

This pandemic would spread worldwide and noone would talk about it, heads would be ‘buried in the sand’ and they would continue to pretend everything was fine.

Beliefs would be formed at a conscious and unconscious levels…

I don’t deserve it,

I am not good enough,

I can’t do it,

People like me don’t deserve happiness,

If only I was taller,

If only I was slimmer…

Negative thoughts would pile on top of each other compounding their effect and you could see in these beings faces their hopes and desires for the year started to fade away…

Just another year, same “crap” just another decade…

Life will never change for us… only the ‘chosen ones’ get what they want in life…

Sighs of resignation and cynicism would soon spread across the globe and then the news would start…

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Poverty is at its highest and doubled since last year,

Exploitation has quadrupled since the beginning of records,

Slavery has resurfaced this time as voluntary slavery…

Redundancies,

Home repossessions, etc, etc…

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These news would demoralise these beings and the light of hope they brought with them into the new year would soon disappear.

Their lives and world would see their colour fade away slowly until it totally disappeared and black and white would appear and take everything with it.

But if only…

They did something different the whole year and perhaps their lives would follow a different route.

They hadn’t explored of what it’d be like welcoming the new year sober or at least ‘semi-conscious’ and start with a clear head.

If the only knew how starting not so much the day but the year with a clear head and started to:

• Reflect on the year gone what worked and what didn’t work,

• What could be done differently,

• New career path in order to fulfil their dreams,

• Write down their goals and focused on what they really wanted to achieve in life,

• Doing something that moves them closer to their goal on a daily basis, from day one,

• Being honest with themselves and change what needs to change so their lives improve,

• Ask for help,

• Save for something worthwhile or important,

• Learn to be kind to themselves. 

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If only they knew that their power is unlimited and anything is at their disposition.

If they only knew that the only thing that has stopped them all those previous years has been themselves and that they only need some guidance and support to help them on their way.

If they only knew that the most important moment of the day is their right now, the second they hesitate to take action because none was taken a second earlier. That the new year, new me; new year, better luck is but a myth.

If they only knew that yesterday’s mistakes and lack of results do not equal tomorrow’s failures but instead tomorrow’s lessons and feedbacks.

If instead of quitting on the 10th of January they carried on till the end of the year or beyond, until those dreams come true.

If they only knew that they are ALL the ‘chosen ones’, that anything worth having is worth working for and never stopping until it materialises and fulfill them to the core of their beings.

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If they only knew that their lives and their stories are worth sharing with the rest of the world AND that they deserve happiness, joy and a lifetime of achievement.

If they only knew that they can do anything, and that there wasn’t a force strong enough to stop them from accomplishing their goals and fulfilling their lives.

If they only knew beliefs and behaviours are stories they keep telling themselves over and over and over again AND that they can override those stories any time and tell themselves a new empowering and uplifting story instead.

If they only knew that their lives matter and that by them living a powerful and magical life the WHOLE world would be inspired to follow suit and live a powerful and magical life.

If they only knew and realised that a life well lived is a life with ups and downs, triumphs and failures and always arriving at that goal that makes it all worth it.

If they only knew that people care about their happiness and achievements and that love and support were there for them if they needed them.

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Though, it isn’t until one of them wakes up and shares with others what’s possible and becomes the evidence that the rest will follow.

All it takes is a person in a family, in a community, in a village, in a province, in a country to defy the odds and become the evidence.

So, in the end it is a choice what makes all the difference in these beings lives, do they continue doing what they have always done, or do they start a new paradigm?

The truth is we will only know when we hear about it through their stories, and anecdotes till then we can only wonder what happens next in the lives of these beings…


When a person reaches their full potential magic occurs AND people start dreaming again and getting to work, so life and love and hope start to spread like wildfire and people become an unstoppable force.

All it takes is one person who says yes to living, yes to life, yes to love and yes to creating a magnificent life.

Are you willing to be that person?

Happy New Year, may 2018 be the year in which your passion and love for life become contagious and you end up touching the lives of countless others.

With all my love,

Jorge

What Are You Afraid Of?

What Are You Afraid Of?

Are Your Fears Holding You Back?

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Here I am in Harley Street, working away and coaching clients, guiding them towards the outcomes they want to achieve. Sounds simple, right?

Well, you probably guessed, it isn’t!

It is far from true.

The more clients I see and help towards their goals, and the more I get involved in Personal Development and work on myself, the more I can see how the number one “thing” that separate us and our goals is FEAR!

What are you afraid of?

Are you afraid of being successful?

Are you afraid of “changing”?

FEAR some people define as the acronym False Expectations Appearing Real, things that aren’t really there; though, we make them much bigger than what they actually are.

I, to some degree agree with that definition.

The way I like to define fear is, holding onto our limiting beliefs which are all we know, it is our identity.

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We aren’t really afraid of anything; we just don’t know any other way.

We have been doing the same things, over and over and over again, that are part of our routine and therefore our behaviours.

So, this has led me to firmly believe than in order to accomplish our goals we don’t have to conquer our fears. All we have to do is create new habits, change the way we feel about our limiting beliefs and transform them into empowering beliefs.

That simple.

Fear isn’t really what is holding us back, it is those daily activities we do or don’t do that keep us behind.

Our habits and our limiting beliefs are what really hold us back.

So, want to make your dreams come true and accomplish your goals?

Change your habits and limiting beliefs.

That’s all that needs to be done.

If you are in the London or Southampton areas in the UK, or anywhere in the world (as long as you have Internet), feel free to contact me for a 30-minutes FREE consultation.

I would love to hear from you and help you move closer towards your dreams.

Till next time.

Please, like, comment, share and suggest what to write about next.

With all my love.

From my heart to yours,

 

Jorge

Desarrollo Personal En Nuestras Vidas

Desarrollo Personal En Nuestras Vidas

El Mannana Empieza A Ser Construido Hoy

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Hola a todos. Espero que esten bien y trabajando hacia sus suennos.

Como mencione anteriormente (y esto incluye mis faltas ortograficas) en este viaje a Estados Unidos me he reencontrado con mis raices latinas (Que nunca he abandonado).

Desde la lengua hasta la cultura (comida y bebidas tambien jiji), y esto movio una nostalgia en mi mente y corazon.

Dejenme explicar, esta nostalgia no es una annoranza sino pena. Vi como muchos latinos que han venido a los Estados Unidos a vivir una mejor vida y realizar sus suennos terminan trabajando en trabajos similares a los que hubiesen hecho en sus paises natales.

Por que?

No es esta la nacion donde los suennos se hacen realidad?

Pues si que lo es. Y esta es la realidad.

La unica diferencia es que aunque muchas personas al migrar, solo cambian paises pero no su forma de pensar.

Voy a ser honesto, llevo muchos annos fuera de America Latina y se poco de como son las cosas en los diferentes paises y en las vidas de las personas en estos paises.

Lo que, por parte se es que cuando uno trabaja en su mente, la forma en que uno piensa y ve la vida, habla por si misma, los resultados lo dicen todo.

Ya recordaran que vivo en Inglaterra, y tambien hay latinos alla, y su forma de ver el mundo es negativa (en mi opinion personal!), y esto es palpable en lo que hacen, en su trabajo y en su vida en general.

Desde muy temprano me gusto la lectura y escribir (en esos dias mi gramatica era mejor jiji), y fue en libros donde encontre respuestas a muchas preguntas que tenia sobre la vida y el mundo, pero tenia mucha pena de preguntarle a alguien.

Fue a traves de los libros que aprendi sobre auto-ayuda y crecimiento personal, evolucion y fe en mi y mis capacidades.

Ahora postulo esta pregunta, estas haciendo algo para llevarte a tus metas?

Estas atendiendo algun seminario, leyendo algun buen libro de auto-ayuda, viendo un video para liberarte de tus pensamientos negativos o simplemente rodeandote de personas positivas (o mas positivas)?

En Europa he conocido a muchas personas de America Latina y de Espanna que llevan puestos una camisa diciendo victima!

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Victimas del sistema, victimas de la sociedad, victimas de sus jefes, victimas de sus padres, y la lista es casi infinita.

Yo? Por otra parte nunca he visto ni he sido “victima” de tales cosas?

Cual es la diferencia?

En mi opinion, la diferencia ha sido la cantidad de estudios que he hecho, he invertido en mi y mi vida, me he rodeado de las personas mas positivas e inspiradoras que he podido encontrar; y como resultado mi vida ha sido diferente.

Todos los dias, leo paginas de un libro (o escribo paginas de uno jiji), escucho audios, veo videos y me rodeo de gente que agrega valor a mi vida y contribuyen hacia mis metas.

Algo que he aprendido en los ultimos 14 annos en Inglaterra ha sido que lo que tengo hoy es el resultado de lo que hice ayer, y lo que tendre manna sera el resultado de lo que hago hoy.

Actualmente estoy en Las Vegas, Nevada en Estados Unidos, muy lejos de mi casa; estoy en una conferencia de uno de mis negocios y aunque esto afecte mi rutina, lo veo como una inversion.

Aun aqui, estoy hacienda cosas que me estan llevando cada dia mas cerca de mis metas.

Cuando era pequenno recuerdo ver con annoranza ciudades y monumentos que pense era solo para personas ricas, como latino pobre pense que estaba condenado a vivir mi vida en un radio de 20 o 30 kilometros. Eso era todo lo que conocia.

Mas, nunca deje de sonnar.

Mis suennos eran y aun son mi prioridad.

Eleji hacer lo que los demas no quieren hacer y eso es sacrificar algo hoy, para tener un mejor mannana.

Ahora, te pregunto esto: Que estas haciendo que te mueve a tu futuro?

Estas leyendo? Estas aprendiendo? Estas trabajando para ser una mejor persona?

O, estas quejandote y haciendo absolutamente nada para mejorar tu situacion presente?

Tu sabes!

Con esto te dejo, y hasta la proxima.

Por favor, lee, comenta y comparte con la gente que conoces.

Con todo mi amor.

Desde mi corazon al tuyo,

 

Jorge

Positive Messages And Re-programming

Positive Messages And Re-programming

Feeding Your Mind With Positives

Greetings from fabulous Las Vegas, Nevada!

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What do you say to yourself when no one is watching?

Be honest.

Well, I will get the ball rolling. When no one is watching I am the meanest person ever to myself, what I say to myself I would probably end up in a fight if anyone said that to me.

So, what can we do when we find ourselves beating ourselves up or kicking ourselves in the butt.

Actually, this reminds me, in one of my NLP trainings, I used the kicking oneself analogy and then I said, how is that even possible? It’s not like we have a prosthetic leg constantly kicking ourselves, or have we? Well, I don’t.

What can we do?

I will give you a few suggestions…

First, I want to reassure you, it is 100% normal and acceptable to have that voice in our head saying things to us, criticising us and hindering our progress. I promise.

It is what we do when this happens what matters.

Some of the things we can do are:

  1. Seek professional help, if in doubt.
  2. Read a good book, self-help rocks!
  3. Listen to audios.
  4. Practice affirmations.
  5. Go for a long walk, never fails.
  6. Have a chat with that “annoying” voice and ask: what do you want?
  7. Read positive daily thoughts.
  8. Surround yourself with positive people.
  9. Be kind to yourself.

You see, there many options to silence those thoughts, I, at times play pretty loud music and lose myself in the lyrics and the rhythm of the music.

What these positive messages coming from all of these different options are doing is helping us re-programme our mind, how we see ourselves and the world around us.

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Remember, what makes a real difference in our lives in the daily things we do to get ourselves to a better place. Rome wasn’t built in a day!

So, here you have it, positive talk, or self-talk can help you re-programme your mindset if you learn to act on it as soon as you notice it.

If you’d like to read some positive messages on a daily basis, check 365 Messages of Hope by moi meme.

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Do something each day to help you create a more helpful inner chatter.

Till next time.

With all my love.

From my heart to yours,

 

Jorge

Core Values

Core Values

Where do they come from?

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Recently, I witnessed something that provoked this question, where do our core values come from?

I was at a local coffee shop (being healthy I promise, and no it is not a pink elephant), and I saw the following:

An older brother (teenager), was in this shop with his two younger brothers, he asked for their food to go (to not pay the tax), and then he sat in to eat with this brothers.

Here is the thing I found the most fascinating, his younger brother said: but you said we’d eat it on the go, what about paying the extra money to sit in.

I could not believe my ears. I felt so proud of that little boy, acting with such integrity at such young age.

Although, I understand that our values are the total sum of all the experiences we’ve had, that we filter this information accordingly, and that we are programmed (by those around us BTW) between the ages of 0-6.

I totally get that, seriously.

But, then this raised this question in my head (dangerous place to be!).

Do we choose to behave unethically when at heart we know what is right and what isn’t?

I will give you some examples.

Stealing. We know it is wrong. Though, people choose to do it. There is nothing wrong with asking for something or help.

Being unpunctual. We know it can have some consequences. Though, people are late (I refer to those who do it ALL the time). Why can’t they plan better? We have tons of resources available nowadays.

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There are other scenarios you can imagine, where the solution is pretty obvious; yet we choose not to do it.

What drives this I do not know.

Though, I still believe at heart, that people make excuses to avoid taking control of their actions, it then becomes a vicious circle of which they can’t get out of.

Then, that cycle strengthens making it even more challenging to break it.

So, what can we do as a society when we notice someone is acting against our values?

How can we educate these “offenders” so there is harmony all around us.

I invite you take a look around you and see what you can notice; watching people making decisions is fascinating and mesmerising at the same time.

I hope you have enjoyed this read.

Please, leave a comment, let me know your thoughts, I welcome them.

My love.

From my heart to yours,

 

Jorge

Being A Victim

Being A Victim

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What is a victim?

According to www.oxforddictionaries.com,

A victim is a person harmed, injured, or killed as a result of a crime, accident, or other event or action: victims of domestic violence, earthquake victims.

Are you a victim?

What is harming you, injuring you, killing you (though, you’d be dead if that was the case!), what event or action is causing you to feel that way?

We hear this word, “victim”, often, people use it when there is somebody else involved.

We are victims of the system. We are victims of our parents, peers, teaches, etc., etc.

So, I am going to pose another question to you.

Who is victimising you?

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In my coaching practice what I aim to do is to help my clients understand, see that they are the ones in control, “ownership” should be their desired outcome, let me explain.

When we take control or ownership of our actions, nothing or almost nothing will hinder you or hold you back.

You mess up, you admit to it, you move on!

It really is that simple.

You make a mistake, you correct it, you move on!

It isn’t that difficult, I promise you.

You have an accident (you know the type of accident I mean), you ensure it doesn’t happen again, move on!

You see, how adopting this mindset has the potential to prevent you from attaching yourself to the outcome, you remove the victim label, you learn whatever lessons must be learned and then you move on, no suffering, no drama, no tears, no end of the world, and you become a better person in the process.

Also, when you own your actions, you don’t let small things bother you longer than they should.

You offend someone, you apologise (or not, your choice), as long as you know this is happening (people call this awareness), that’s it, period, end of!

In the past I have been guilty of being a “victim”, I still am at times (especially when my partner and I have a row, lol), and it took me a while to realise that I was being it, a viiiiictiiiiiim.

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I believe, I have mentioned that I love reading, I can’t put books down.

One day, I was reading a book by Doreen Virtue, the Angels author, in this book she said (BTW, she is a psychologist too!), when you are a victim what you are really saying is: someone has control over you.

OMG!

That was it for me.

Even to this point in my life and career I didn’t quite grasp what being a victim really was.

But having read that small sentence was it for me.

When I was being (or when I am being) a victim what I am doing is giving power, control to someone over me.

Hell no.

I have gone all my life, doing my best to being independent and free of anything or anyone.

Yet, I was still attaching myself to people and circumstances and being dependent, co-dependent and doing the complete opposite to what I had set out to do.

Today, I know different.

Whatever happens in my life, good or bad, I do not attach myself to the outcome, and that way if something goes badly wrong I will not dwell on it for long, so I don’t become a victim of it.

I understand and I know it is easier said than done.

We have been brought up in a society and culture where we almost feel we have to excuse our behaviours and pass them onto somebody else, someone is responsible but us.

It takes time, takes practice, it takes a willing desire it to improve it.

Do you want to be a victim or a hero in your life?

Do you want to be remembered for always complaining about how hard life is?

Or,

Do you want to be remembered for being in charge and control of your life?

The option is yours.

Whether you want to be a victim or not, it is up to you.

If you want to be a hero, that is up to you too.

I invite you to take control over your life and start living the life of your dreams.

If you need help, seek it.

If you need direction, look for it.

There are plenty options out there to get you in the right path.

Want to know how I work? Get in touch, you know how to contact me, don’t you?

Till next time.

Please share with others.

With all my love.

From my heart to yours,

 

Jorge

Telling Your Story To The World

Telling Your Story To The World

Sharing Your Gift

 

When I was growing up, back in Panama City, I genuinely thought I had nothing to offer to the world, no value to add, in essence I felt I was worth nothing and whether I did something or nothing at all, it would have not made any difference in the world.

I understand there are many people who feel the same way I once felt, for those of you, do not worry, the best is yet to come; the only thing you must do is to work on yourself and believe that what you do and who you are matter.

So, now, I know different, I know that it doesn’t matter where you are from, what you know, what you do or who you are, all of that matters, you know why? Because you matter, you are important and, awesome J.

I put it out there, just in case no one has mentioned it or you have forgotten it.

I must be honest, it took me a few years to learn that what I do matters, what I have matters and who I am matters.

In Growing Confident, I do apologise if I mention it too much – it is my baby! In here I share my story with the world, I open myself up and tell the world who I was and who I became.

In Growing Confident (which I hope you have read, if not, what are you waiting for?), there are two chapters I am most excited and proud of, these are:

  • Telling your story to the world, and
  • Sharing your gift.

The essence of these two chapters is that it does not matter how small or big, you think you are (cos it is a thought either way!), you will always have a story to tell, inspire others with your greatness and awesomeness (cos we all are! Yes, you too are!).

Oftentimes we forget what we have undergone and fought against to be where we are, and at the same time, we forget that there are people out there (the world is a big place you know! – over 7 billion people – that makes it 14 billion eyes, a lot of teeth and hair!!!), these people whom we might or might not personally know could potentially be facing similar circumstances to those we once faced.

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So, why not share it?

I will tell you a brief story, which upset me and saddened me at the time.

Currently, I am working on a second book, this required me to interview various people from the LGBTQA Community, to my astonishment, a great percentage of the people I asked felt and thought they had nothing to share, their words were: I live a boring life, no one would be interested in…

Please, I beg of you, remove such thoughts from your head (or else I will go and physically remove them from there – and you do not want to see a passionate Latino gay guy in your head fighting your thoughts!!! My partner sees it every day. Bless him!).

You, your life, your work, everything about you matters.

Period!

So, my question to you is, are you telling your story to those around you and reaching the lives of those whom you are yet to meet?

There are endless means to accomplish this.

I, hand on heart, would love to hear your story and find how it can help me be and become a better person.

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Equally, what is your gift?

As mentioned, I thought I had nothing special that could separate me from the rest and worth sharing…

How wrong was I!

Yes, it took me a while to figure them out.

Yes, I had to take on some trainings.

Who cares?

I have skills and assets worth sharing with the world.

Because I chose to, now I know, that with my coaching I can coach clients to become confident and successful, and help them get their businesses to the next level; and with trainings in Reiki, NLP and EFT, I am able to transfer skills and knowledge that will benefit my students and their clients, everyone wins.

With my poems and writing I am able to impact my readers, with my cooking I feed my body, my partner and guests; with my charisma (yep, I am charismatic, even if I may say so) and humour, I touch peoples’ lives through laughter.

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I could go on and on and on and on and on and on and on… (sorry I got a bit carried away).

Though, there isn’t any point if you don’t believe you have a story to tell or a gift to share.

If that is the case, what can you do to remove that unwanted, unuseful programming and very limited belief system.

Why not seek professional help?

I know this awesome coach and therapist who can help you.

Believe me, your future self will thank you for it.

Do not forget you are awesome, you are amazing and absolutely everything about you is important and matters.

Just believe in yourself.

I look forward to hearing your story and experiencing your gift in my life.

As always, leave comments, feedback welcome and till next time.

With all my love.

From my heart to yours,

 

Jorge

 

 

 

Why Do Poets Write Poetry?

Why Do Poets Write Poetry?

What poetry is your heart telling?

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From a very early age I have loved poetry and literature, though, I have to admit I am mostly inclined to say that poetry is my favourite.

As a good Latin boy (or man, the option is yours J), passion is a great part of my life, I am passionate about everything, it is a part of who I am, my identity.

I find that poetry touches me, and moves many emotions deep in me.

When I was growing up (I still am, at least hope to grow a little more), I had fewer friends than the average child/teenager, we just had different ideas and very little in common.

So, I found myself reading whatever I could get hold of, it served me in many ways, and to this date I still love reading, whether it is an article, a chapter of a good book, a short story, an essay or a poetry (oh poetry… what would this man’s life be without you, you sweet muse, my delightful muse).

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I have to be totally honest, I was very fortunate I had one of the best literature professors anyone could ever wish for at college, Mrs Matute was the best, because of her I fell in love with Latin America’s short literature and prose history.

At the age of 15, we were encouraged (though, some of my peers felt we were forced to!), to compile a list of 100 poems from our favourite poet, from the 18th century (oh, how wonderful I thought – I was a library mouse, still am!). Mrs Matute lived for her literature and she was able to inspire and pass that beautiful knowledge onto others (at least the willing ones, like myself).

Well, what can I say?

I felt compelled to write poetry.

I started writing poetry in my diary, I felt it was the easiest way to put on paper what I was feeling at the time. Though, to my amazement, I was not the only one, some of my closest friends at school too (the handful of friends I had J – it is not about the quantity you know!).

Now, I am able to see poetry and literature through a completely different filter, through the eyes of a coach and therapist.

So, when I look at a poem, I don’t just see some words or piece of art, I see a part of someone who put their feelings and emotions, opinions and ideas, likes and dislikes, for eternity, for everyone to see, and see life through their eyes, through their filters.

I, personally, have found poetry and literature rather therapeutic and healing.

When, I put my thoughts and ideas on paper, I feel lighter, there is a mental release, and whatever has troubled me seems to vanish either for good or at least momentarily.

Then, when I visit those poems or writing, or pieces of me on writing I am able to assess and determine what was going through my mind at the time.

Based on what I have said so far, I would say that poets write poetry, not only because they love life and poetry, but because they feel the urge and need to release a demon deep inside of them, that speaks to them in verse rather than in words, just like an artist paints on a canvas what they see in their mind’s eye.

A poet puts on paper what is in his heart, what is buried deep in his soul and by bringing it to the surface, i.e. the paper of the computer screen, he releases it and able to rest.

Writing poetry is not difficult, on the contrary it is so simple, there are no rules, the only rule is that you empty what is inside of you, your love, your inspiration, a part of you; other than anything goes, anything, you set the bar and put the limits.

In my few years on this planet I have written hundreds of poems, sadly some of them lasted momentarily, the emotions attached to them were far too great to keep; however, those that reminded me of the fun, joy and love I have experienced so far, are still with us.

If you are curious and would like to read my poetry you can find some of my poems on my ebook Soul Poems, From My Heart To Yours available on Amazon, and Growing Confident, 10 Simple Steps To A More Confident You available on DragonRising.com, check them out, I have written them with all my love.

So, what I am really getting at here is, whenever you feel excited, sad, in love, inspired put it on paper, write a poem, write something about whatever is going in your head and bring it to live, materialise it and allow that process to be completed and healed.

An idea on paper, a feeling on paper is much better than something that is constantly lurking on our heads and keeping us trapped and depending on it.

I highly encourage you to give it and go, and if you feel brave, whether it is a book or poems, have them published, share them with the world.

I will explore this in more detail tomorrow, sharing your story and gift with the world (I speak of these two subjects in more detail on Growing Confident).

Do it, your future self with thank you and, you never know whose life you might positively impact as a direct result.

Till tomorrow.

With all my love.

From my heart to yours,

 

Jorge

Why do people (and Bob Geldof?) “Not Like” or hate Mondays”?

Why do people (and Bob Geldof?) “Not Like” or hate Mondays”?

Why?

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For as long as I can remember, I have recollections of people “cursing”, both metaphorically and literally speaking, Mondays, I never quite understood why and, truth be told I do not know or “get” why, as yet!

My experiences with Mondays have always been sooo different, compared to what other people have shared with me in past.

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Those who know me (I hope you get to know me too!) cannot understand why I, on the other hand, looooove my Mondays.

I see Mondays as a new beginning, new opportunities have been granted to us and we are able to “regain” control over our affairs.

After a couple of days off, i.e. Saturday and Sunday, it can be a challenge and quite difficult to bring oneself back to that mindset of getting things done and getting our priorities right!

Though, when you look forward to starting a new chapter in your month or year, Mondays have the potential to become our best allies. When you look forward to a new week and by that I mean, Monday, you become excitable, hopeful and inspired to take action and, have a great week.

It is not uncommon to hear people doing a countdown to their weekend, almost as if they were running away from their week or themselves; sadly, it is a different story altogether, when it comes to a Monday.

I start to wonder, if people were more “open minded” about Mondays and what they have to offer, would they be welcoming more opportunities and a new approach to the week ahead?

Continuing on what we talked about yesterday, language and communication, when we vocalise we “hate” Mondays, we wish it still was the weekend, or beg for one more day; is it fair to say we are setting ourselves for failure?

Think about it? If you have to do something you “hate”, you are not going to enjoy, no matter what.

But, if you looooove what you are going to be doing, if you are welcoming it into your life and you are excited, the results well, they will speak for themselves.

I truly hope you have found this brief and short blog of some use to you.

Try it, in fact do it, next Monday, I invite you to be excited about and notice the difference it creates in your week and who knows maybe even your life.

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Till next time (which is tomorrow BTW).

With all my love.

From my heart to yours,

 

Jorge

 

PS, as always feel free to comment, share and give any feedback J

 

Is Communication More Important Than Language?

Is communication more important than language?

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Today is the last day of a NLP Practitioner training I am delivering here in Southampton, England.

As a trainer of NLP and various other modalities, and as a Coach and Therapist I am particularly interested and fascinated by communication and language.

Before I fully go into this blog, I want to take the opportunity to say that effective communication is much more than speaking properly and using the best words to describe any given situation. English isn’t my first language, yet it hasn’t stopped me from communicating effectively nor has it been the reason why I might have miscommunicated in the past.

That having been said (deep sigh!), I can start this blog.

In NLP we have some “mantras” or sayings which we call The Presuppositions of NLP. What this means is we take them and treat them as law to enable us to look at things and situations from a different light.

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There are two of these presuppositions that come to mind:

  1. The meaning of communication is the response you get, and
  2. You cannot not communicate.

You see, they might seem quite cryptic and almost have no meaning; though, when you break them down their meaning or core message is so powerful.

If we take the first one, the meaning of communication is the response we get.

I invite you to revisit a past event where you had a conversation with someone (anyone would do nicely BTW), and that conversation went wrong, totally pear-shaped!

What went wrong?

What did you do?

What did you say?

How did you say it?

I am not accusing you of anything, I promise! (Or am I?)

By asking this questions what I am aiming for you to do is to start noticing how there are many elements involved at the time we communicate with other people.

Things like, the time of the day, the time of the month, our current state, our financial situation, whether we are hungry or in a hurry; these factors can influence the how we come across to others, this then is transferred to our physiology (some people call this body language!), the tempo and speed of our voice, and at times they can have a direct or indirect impact in the choice of the words we use at the time.

If we take, for example, “body language” (I am sorry, I am laughing at this moment – I built this image of headless bodies running around talking and doing their day-to-day tasks), we can then see how the use of our height, hands, feet can play a huge role when we speak to others, we may come across as friendly or unfriendly, as an ally or as a threat.

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It has been said in the past that 55% of our communication is that non-verbal “stuff” we say or don’t say when we have a conversation with colleagues, friends or children. The rest, 38% is how we say things and only 7% relates to the words we use (choose to use really!).

These 3 things should be aligned and in congruency when we speak, so the words we say should match how we speak them and what our bodies are saying too.

To illustrate this, just imagine having a conversation with a child asking him or her, have you washed your hands? And, they respond by say yes, nodding negatively and their hands are covered in dirt? Would you be satisfied with that answer, when their bodies don’t match what has been said?

Looking at the other presupposition, you cannot not communicate (a double negative, oh dear! – BTW I don’t think we have these in Spanish! – phew), what this is really telling us is We Are Always Communicating, whether we want it or not – even in our sleep.

So, now let’s look at the linguistic side of communication.

We are very familiar with phrases like “negative self-talk”, “positive language”, “clean language”, “sexy language” – aka, dirty language (sorry, I couldn’t resist) and, we also have what we call “ecological language” in NLP (this means how the language used can have an impact in our environment, both internal and external).

Language is much more than words and sentences succinctly and beautifully put together, it is much more than the artful skills we have been told people like Shakespeare, Wordsworth and many others possessed in the olden days.

To me, and let me clarify it, this is my bias; language is how we make people feel, how we make ourselves feel.

If we use negative language and negative words, there is a change in our psychology and mindset, even in our physiology, it disempowers us and, can take us down a path we might wish we never visited.

On the other hand, when the language we choose to use is positive (did I mention that we have the choice?), the results, well, are obvious, these words are healing, empowering, energetic, heartfelt and they will have the potential to transform lives, create results and move us towards our final destination, happiness (The Promised Land!), or whatever goal/outcome we are working towards.

If, to what we just touched on, we add action, planning and dedication; we will have a winning formula to accomplish whatever we set our minds to. The LoA (aka Law of Attraction) would be many times more effective because the use of our language fuels and inspires our biggest asset, our brain.

Positive language, positive self-talk can most certainly drive our psychology to get the results we want in our lives.

So, I wonder, if I may ask, how is your language impacting your life and the lives of those you meet? How is your language affecting your outcomes and goals, and whether to take action or not?

I am curious to know, please feel to share with me if you can. You can comment below or send me a pm or email (oh, and don’t forget to share J).

Till next time, BTW, feel free to suggest what topics you would like me to cover, if I am able and it is a subject I am knowledgeable about, I would be delighted to give my (biased) opinion.

With all my love.

From my heart to yours,

 

Jorge

 

PS, email me on jorge@lifecoachsouthampton.co.uk if you wish to share how your language is affecting your outcomes or how it has affected your outcomes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Healthy Mind In A Healthy Body

A Healthy Mind In A Healthy Body

Is this the key to real success?

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Mens sana in corpore sano

When I was growing up I remember hearing the saying: a healthy mind in a healthy body.

To be frank and totally honest, I did not make any sense of this quote, to me it all sounded like a fancy saying, which meant a lot of nothing.

As you may remember, I grew up in Panama, a place many would call paradise on earth.

If you don’t know much about Panama, I will tell you a bit about it.

Panama is a small country, an isthmus which joins South America to Central America, that’s right Central America does exist! It is not a myth J.

In Panama, we are very lucky (oh, BTW I live in Britain now – a bit of a contrast lol), it is summer pretty much all year round. We have two seasons, a dry and a wet one, but even in the wet season temperatures don’t go any lower than 25 degrees.

The produce is always fresh, pretty much all organic and the flavours are all there, no seasoning needed, nature takes care of all of that.

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Good weather, sunny, the wind caresses your skin and plays with your hair, like you see in the movies. The beaches are sandy ones, warm waters, delicious fish and shellfish. Our rivers are refreshing and so clean.

In the countryside the air pollution is non-existent, life is pretty much the same it was over one hundred years ago.

All of that meant nothing to me, I took it all for granted.

Truth be told, I honestly thought everyone lived the same.

I will share something so funny, to show you how naïve I was (I can’t believe I am going to share this with you!), before I moved to England I genuinely thought that every country in the world had the same seasons as we did in Panama, that the days and nights lasted the same length of time and that the whole world was under the same time zone!!!

When I learned that this wasn’t so I realised how isolated I was from the world and I truly believed that Panama was the centre of the universe!

Well, enough said!

Those days are over, I did learn a bit more since then.

Now that you know a bit more about Panama and my “embarrassing” naivety, let’s get going with this blog.

I didn’t think much about that old saying.

It wasn’t until I moved to Britain in 2002, after having gained more than 30 lbs in about 3 months that I started to become more aware of what I ate and the impact it had in my life.

Even then, I was counting calories and “controlling” what I ate, yet not really embracing the concept of a “healthy mind”.

Those of you who live in Britain or know about the culture will know that this is a culture where alcohol is very appreciated, venerated some would say!

I moved here in my late teens, so I embraced the culture very well, in fact too well, that I became very social, and by that I mean a social drinker.

Still, I didn’t worry or bother too much about that old saying… A healthy mind in a healthy body, WT…!

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In my early 20’s I discovered Yoga, it was almost accidental, and no, I do not mean that I accidentally fell into the lotus pose; what I mean is I found myself going to a Hatha Yoga class and falling in love with everything Yoga stood for, breathing, meditation, fitness, and a “lifestyle”.

In my mid 20’s I finally got what people meant when they said that after certain age your body started to go against you, i.e. you start to “pile it on”, you have less “energy”, all in all you start “decaying” a lot quicker.

Yet, I didn’t make any sense of that old saying… blah, blah, blah.

Even though, I knew about personal development, I simply thought that the mind had nothing to do and no connection whatsoever with what I ate, nothing, nada, rien!

Then, one summer, I found myself making a decision, which to be honest even surprised me. This decision was to be a vegan.

I had tried being a veggie (not an actual vegetable BTW), and this lasted a few minutes, seconds after having made that decision in the past, I was caught stuffing my face with some steak, what a fraud.

Though, this time things were different. I felt compelled to make this work, something deep inside of me was telling me to give this a shot.

I had my partner laughing at me, saying how is it possible a cannibal like me could give his meat up, just like that and, he said: I don’t see you lasting more than two weeks.

Did I mention I did this for health reasons too?

Prior to this I had been to see a nutritionist, due to methane “issues”, after some investigating she determined I had two problems, 1) a “leaky” gut and, 2) “parasites” – various types of amoebas, to be more precise! (Later I was diagnosed with candidiasis, but that is a whole different story – there is some relevancy though).

Guess what? Even then, I still didn’t see the connection between a healthy this and a healthy of the other…

Going back to my “vegan” venture, after my first 2 weeks I was so energised, I could see a difference in my waist line, my skin complexion had never been so good, people noticed a change in my “energy” and energy levels, all in all everything was “better”.

The months I stayed as a vegan I felt a great connection to the universe, to people and to myself; I was able to think clearly and logically, my mind seemed to organise itself almost as if by magic.

The benefits were too many to count.

All because I was eating cleaner, just the way I used to back home.

At that moment, I remember an old saying I once heard: a healthy mind in a healthy body.

When I fully entered in the personal development world as coach, trainer and author I totally got what that saying meant.

I was able to comprehend the impact of what we eat has in our minds.

Simply put (this is biology 101 BTW), our brain needs glucose (a form or sugar – which it uses as fuel) to function properly, just imagine what happens to that engine if you give it the wrong fuel?

You are right, it would not function. It would be like putting diesel in a petrol car or vice versa, it would destroy it after a while.

The same happens to our brains, give it the wrong form of glucose, i.e. refined sugars, too much gluten, refined flours, etc., etc., and it becomes clunky, slows down and the way we respond and react to life suffers too.

If you go back to when you were a child, compared to your children, you will see a difference in your kitchen cupboards, pretty much everything comes out of a pack or can.

Do you think that your brain thrives from this kind of fuel?

I invite you to reflect on what you eat or, if you are braver reach to your kitchen cupboards and fridge and be honest, is what you have there fresh and good fuel for your brain?

What can you do right now to change that and give the right fuel to your brain, so you get the results you want in your life?

Want better health? Eat healthier.

Want to be leaner? Eat leaner foods.

Want to be more energised? Eat earth’s natural “red bull”.

All you have to do is switch the “manmade” stuff for the “naturemade” stuff, your body, your mind and your future self will thank you for it.

There is only one way to find out if this works and that is by trying it out by yourself.

Give it a go, you won’t regret it.

Who knows, what we eat might even be equal to our results.

Remember, a healthy body in a healthy mind or something like that… wait a minute, I got it (finally!), A Healthy MIND In A Healthy BODY.

I hope you have enjoyed this blog, please feel free to comment on it, give me some feedback and share it with others.

Till next time.

With all my love.

From my heart to yours,

 

Jorge

Why do people not invest on their minds?

Why do people not invest on their minds?

Are they missing out on their personal development?

 

When you go out and about, if you live in a big city, you will notice rows and rows of hair salons, beauty parlours, nail parlours, gyms, membership clubs (for golfers, tennis, swimmers, etc.), restaurants, cinemas, nightclubs (not that there is anything wrong in enjoying a night out every now and then!), theatres, aesthetic clinics (which aren’t cheap!), shopping centres, etc.; I could go on and on if I wanted to, I hope I am starting to paint the picture for you here.

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I am not going to deny I have been, in fact still am, guilty of going to these tempting places where you have the potential to work on your “social skills and life”, work on your body or against it (the choice is ours normally, don’t think anyone makes us!), we make ourselves look more attractive (externally); we even go to extremes to “feel” better about ourselves!

I was a confessed shop-aholic, until I discovered my shopping strategy (so I am saving lots and lots of money now); I still to this date invest in my well-being by going to the gym and eating the good stuff (I must confess I can be naughty at times too!), and working in an aesthetic clinic (best in the UK btw!) I too have had some treatments to make my looks last longer (preventative measures these are J); so I totally get why people do it.

However, not many of these places offer a good solution to peoples’ problems.

We live in a society, where unfortunately we want everything yesterday, today is too late, that instant gratification has become our worst enemy.

In my personal and humble opinion, I have noticed that people do not know enough about personal development and what it can do for them.

Before I go on (which I can do!), I would like to tell you a little about me.

I have been in personal development more than half my life. When I was a teenager I thought life was against me – I wore the biggest “victim” t-shirt going, I honestly thought I was doomed and my life would end up pretty bad!

For some strange reason, I was fascinated and mesmerised by science (for a good Catholic boy, anyway); so, I would do my best to find answers, I needed that empirical evidence that something was real or not, before I could make my mind up about something or anything.

This led me to read books (and I still do, loooove my books), I knew, in my heart, that I could overcome the obstacles I was facing, being a Catholic gay boy in a very macho society isn’t really ideal; so, my search continued…

I was the president of a local library, at this time I was fortunate to have come across a private library that had been donated to the library, as the president I was given the task to go through the books and choose the ones that were fit for the library and the rest, well I could either take them or they would have been thrown away (I can’t believe people throw books away!).

Among these books, there were hundreds of titles that grabbed my attention, filled my heart with hope and sounded like the solution to my problems (they ones I thought I had!), many of the titles were self-help book, DIY books essentially, I read some of them and found them pointless, others where OK, but one never left my mind, this book was The Unlimited Power by Tony Robbins (the then Anthony Robbins), this book blew my mind away, and allowed me to see  what was possible not only with NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) and personal development.

It is fair to say that I, too, have been touched by Tony Robbins’ inspiration, like many other millions around the globe.

Now, going back to the subject at hand, I have noticed that most people think or imagine that personal development either doesn’t “work”, is too “expensive”, is for “gifted” people, is for “rich” people, is for the “chosen” ones, is not “fast” enough, etc., the list could go on.

The truth is, personal development is part of us, of our “journey”, part of our “evolution”, our birthright, is finding the truth of who we are, as put by Campbell: it is our Hero’s Journey.

Personal development gives us the opportunity to work on the most important “muscle” we possess, our brain, our mind, which rules over and controls everything we do, the decisions we make, the actions we take or not, the movements we do, the thoughts we have, the creative moments we have, the positive or negative self-talk, and much more.

For those who are fans of the gym, the more you use a muscle the bigger it gets, simple! The mind is that muscle, we take for granted, many people around the world only exercise it till they go to college or University, after that, well – the usage is very low and limited, just take a look around you, do you think that all the violence, fear, anger and negativity portrayed by the media is showing people who use their minds and brains effectively and for the highest good of humanity, of course not!

When you embark in the world of personal development is like stepping in a fantasy land, you discover that absolutely anything is possible if you set your mind to it and it is in alignment with your values and heart’s desires.

If you are an athlete or gymgoer, or if you have a business or have a senior position at work; whether you are “young” or “old”, the more you work on yourself (i.e. your mind, aka, you mindset) and capabilities the better you do at sport, the more you are recognised at work and the result (I like to call this the bonus track, by the way), life just gets easier.

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You see, when you learn that in life there are two options you either act or react, in a nutshell, you either do it or you don’t.

In personal development you learn that you are in control, you are the captain of your ship, you are the CEO of your life and whether something happens or not, it is your call, you call the shots, no one else.

The more you work on yourself, the more you work on your mind the better you get, the better your results, the better your life.

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When people go to the hair salon, or beautician, if they aren’t working on themselves it would NOT matter how much money they spend on themselves or how good they look, if they don’t work on the deep stuff, if they don’t work on their minds, those exterior things will make no difference, it will only be a temporary mask or cover up.

If you go to the gym, or if you are dieting, if you don’t work on your emotions or your mind, the results you get will be momentary and you might find yourself going back to square zero, yo-yo dieting, and guess what? That money will have been wasted.

This, does NOT happen in personal development, it is all an investment!

Dining out, going for a walk, dancing till the sun comes out, if you aren’t working on yourself are forms of escapism, and it will not matter how much you try and how many times you go out, each and every time you go back home or back to work, you will be facing the same reality, nothing will change until you do something about it.

As said, I enjoy those things mentioned earlier, I have a personal trainer, I like to look after myself, I love going out, like many of us do; though, I understand that in order to get results at the gym, in life or in general, I must work on the most important asset I possess, my mind.

Without personal development, doing all the things I do, would be like shooting an arrow without a goal, arrows would be shot aimlessly and someone could be hurt.

Just think, how many times have you acted without thinking, and has anyone around you been hurt?

On the contrary, when you have thought things through, have you felt the difference?

Personal development isn’t expensive, if the next door Latino neighbour (oh, by the way, I am from Panama) can afford it, anyone can afford it, I mean it anyone!

Once I attended a seminar, which totally revolutionised my life, here the coach said something I will never ever in a billion years forget, he said: when you truly want something, anything in life, you will find the money, time and energy to make it happen.

OMG, I saw the light. At that moment I had been in the personal development world for over a decade and this was it!

You see, real change doesn’t happen overnight, it takes time, it is like a bank account, the more you add to it the better and bigger the interest, in this case the interest is a better life, a life of possibilities and options.

You needn’t be afraid, you needn’t be worried, if you want to be a better person, get to work, but work on yourself and your mind.

I have noticed and experienced that people are afraid or fearful of their own success, or change, or not being liked anymore; the truth is, who cares.

Truth be told, in personal development you DO NOT change a thing, you simply are a better version of yourself.

When you are in a better place or better frame of mind you learn that the only opinion that really matters is that you have about yourself, the way you see yourself.

What are you waiting for?

If you want to achieve a goal or make your dreams come true get working, right now.

I recommend a great book, by this awesome chap Jorge Vence (wait a minute, that’s me!), in his book entitled Growing Confident he shares his story with the reader, worth your read, and packed with some useful tips and exercises to get you going in your personal development journey.

Or, if you want to get things going and are really really serious about your development as a person and committed to yourself, contact me, and let’s have a 30-minutes free consultation to see where you want to be and how we can make it happen. Yes, I will take you by the hand and help you get to where you want to be. How cool is that?

I look forward to hearing from you real soon, and who knows maybe even see you in my Harley Street clinic, or in my Southampton clinic to make your dreams and goals come true.

Please like, share and comment on this blog.

Till next time.

With all my love,

From my heart to yours,

 

Jorge

 

Now is the Time

Now is the time

clock-01

 You have come so far,

Yet, the journey has just begun

Wake up! Wake up!

Don’t turn your back on the now,

Let go of the past,

What purpose does it serve you?

Where can you find that what you seek?

Isn’t the present the future you once dreamt?

Where has it gone?

What have you done?ElectronicAwakening-Image2

Wake up! Wake up!

Aren’t dreams anything but fantasies?

Is reality but a bad dream?

What do to? Where to go?

The past has left you behind,

Betrayed you with a false good-bye

Too late, too soon, it was gone.

Wake up! Wake up!

The clock is ticking,

Surrender your stubbornness,

Accept, you are all that matters

Yesterday has left you,

Tomorrow awaits you,

Trust and belief, the time is right

Your dues have been paid

Freedom has found you

Let it in, let it stay

Conquer your fears,

Let go of your yesterdays

Welcome your tomorrows

Wake up! Wake up!

The time is right, the time is now,

Now is the time,

Now is your time.

Jorge

jorge

Control. Who is in charge of your life?

Control

Who is in charge of your life?

Control-Button-Artgif

It has been a while since I have put fingers to keyboard. Since the last blog on the 1st of January I have embarked on a journey of self-discovery, learning and experiencing so I can share with you my findings.

Many of us have heard the quote by Ford: Whether you think you can or not, you are right!

In the last few months I have come to the understanding that it isn’t that straightforward, it may appear simple, the reality is less so.

When we learn there are four stages in the learning process:

  • Unconscious incompetence – we don’t know what we don’t know,
  • Conscious incompetence – we know what we don’t know,
  • Conscious competence – we know what we know, and
  • Unconscious competence – we don’t know what we know or mastery!

So I have concluded that until we step into the conscious incompetence sphere in life, we won’t be able to determine what we can or not do. All else is just but an assumption.

Fear on the other hand, is what has been driving many people for centuries, generations of families, groups and societies. This fear, is much more than the acronym it has been given many times – False expectations appearing real! –

What is driving this fear? Or the force behind it? In my experience and understanding it is stress, due to the environment, our behaviours and beliefs in general.

So, we go in life (and I include myself here!), creating this pseudo reality, a stress-packed and stress-full life and reality, where we don’t trust our feelings, emotions and inner guidance; dreams don’t matter any longer and the spark we were once born with slowly fades away, ultimately we miss out on what could have been our biggest and best achievements and successes in life.

Stress, in my opinion stands for (why not give it an acronym too!)

  • Silly,
  • Tormenting,
  • Ridiculous,
  • Endless,
  • Self-
  • Sabotaging.

Do I need to expand on what these mean?

What to do then?

Simple, make a decision, just one decision, THE single most important decision you will have ever made in your life, right now. Step off your comfort zone and explore life on the “conscious incompetence level”, explore something new, something that scares you and allows you to grow as an individual.

In my case, that “something” scary was to be true to myself, and tap into my mission and purpose in this life-time, which is to help people find their mission and purpose in life. It wasn’t easy, I had to explore the unknown (to me), grow and evolve so I could find my strengths and opportunities around me.

Before then, I only focussed on the “stick”, my weaknesses and threats… In a nutshell I was stressed and I did not know it; fear took over and imprisoned me in a jail of my own creation which was strengthened by own liming beliefs and demons.

Now, on this side of the comfort zone, what can I say? I am here, typing this blog for you to read and ignite that flame, passion and life, in you.

Go and take control of your life, grab the pen and start writing your own story.

handwriting

What will you do differently from now?

Share with me.

Jorge

JV Mind and Soul Awakener

Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Journal

There are many people who don’t get this far. We are the lucky one who have seen another second, another minute, another hour, another day and most importantly another year.

Happy New Year to you all.

Today is by far the most important day of the year (at least I see it that way). Today DREAMS are built upon, fantasies created, wishes spread across the globe and hope scattered like glitter. But for how long will you stick to that promise or promises which we in a very naïve manner call resolutions?

I would encourage to honour your former self, the person from yesterday, last year. If they could see you, in your current state, what would that say? Would they be pleased? Or perhaps saddened to see you are worse off?

Many of us before the clock ticks midnight look up to the sky and silently pray that the New Year would be a tiny better than the previous year or at least more gentle.

But what if I were to say you have always had the tools and capacity to build those dreams to your liking? To create your perfect reality? The perfect life?

Whenever I have a client I ask them what their beliefs and values are? What do they hold important in the heart, lives and in general?

What are your beliefs and values? Are they getting you where you want to head to? Or are they simply holding you back?

What is important to you? Your family? Your job? Money? Protect the planet? Are you doing all you can to fulfil your dreams? Or are you just watching yourself in the third position, how all goes wrong and you are unable to warn or even protect yourself?

By asking all these questions I don’t wish to make you feel uncomfortable or make you feel guilty, or even make you visit the past; I am just urging you to start in the NOW, take control of your life and teach others to do the same.

Take a notepad, a tablet or a desktop and make a list of everything you want in life, DREAM, be a 5 years old and dream on paper, be as ambitious as you possibly can and ignore any negative self-talk, ALLOW yourself to be a dreamer; once you have a list of all the things you want next to them give them a date by which you would like it, i.e. one month, 6 months, one year, etc..

Keep this document by your bedtable, in your pocket and with you 24/7, and whenever you feel “down”, take it and see what your former self dreamt of at one point, making you reconnect with your desires, dreams and hope and take you where you want to in life.

Just remember whatever have happened in the past, is gone, it doesn’t matter any longer; if it however, bothers you, seek professional help to help you deal with it. And the future is not set on stone for anyone, you are the writer of that poem or book, you are the sculptor of that master piece, and only you can make it happen.

Much love,

Jorge

mind and soul

PS. If you have any feedback or comment do not hesitate to share with me.

The power of dreaming

The power of dreaming

childIntheClouds

When I think of dreams and dreaming I see an acronym:

D Desire, know what your heart wants.

RRespect, for what you want and yourself, it is Okay to want better and more out of life as long as you don’t affect anyone.

E – Energy, a dream is lifeless if we don’t put any effort into making it real, dreams like goals need work and doing to make them happen.

AAcceptance, by this I mean accept the outcome and ourselves, love ourselves for who we are.

MMotivation, if your dreams don’t make you do something crazy every single day then they do not motivate you enough.

Once I read an article where it stated that the average person stops dreaming at the age of 25. At that moment I thought to myself: “My god, how sad it is to know people stop dreaming when their lives are just beginning.”

Many things happen in these peoples’ lives that force them to stop dreaming. I will, however, talk about the number one “issue”, limiting-beliefs, low self-esteem, map of the world, etc.

How do our limiting-beliefs stop us from dreaming?

What I have noticed in my professional experience and growing up was that very few people take notice of what is going on around them. Let me explain this further, in a “normal” family, let’s say 4, boy and a girl, and two parents. Each person in this family has their own “drama”, and their own beliefs. The father may be experiencing problems at work, working longer hours, not enough money to see them through the end of the month. The mother who may or not be working, may have similar problems at work, worrying about her husband possibly having an affair, her children’s education and the fact she feels she isn’t spending enough time with her family.

On the other hand we have the children, they may be really close in age or have a few years in between them. They both have their own personalities and already have perceptions about the world around them, “what is right and what isn’t right! (according to them anyway!)”. They may be struggling at school, bullying, puberty, etc.

As you can see I have descried almost 100% accurately what we see day in and day out in many families around us. And it is this never ending cycle or worrying and preoccupying about our personal issues that we grow learning to bottle it up, we become just too scare to share with our siblings, parents and friends what is troubling us.

So, the more we hide, conceal and bottle up what is happening in our lives; the more we strengthen and reinforce these negative beliefs, limiting-beliefs; we charge them up and make them even bigger than they were in the first place.

Now, there is a solution, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I would encourage you to take a look at your current situation. Are you happy? Is your current life what you dreamed of as a child?

If the answer is not, look back to your childhood and see whether you can see where it all started; almost as if you were looking for an archive at the library. What happened in your life that made you stop wanting to dream and create the life you deserve?

What belief did you form that day? Was there someone involved in the process? Are you punishing them by self-sabotaging yourself day in and day out?

Do this as often as you can, with your eyes closed. Look into the past, learn from it and use the knowledge you have gained to heal your past and be able to dream again. As I have said before taste the poison but don’t drink it.

You will see that with time you will be more optimistic about your life, you will dream again and you will start seeing live through the eyes of a child again and reconnect with all the wonders the world has to offer.

You will realise the true potential of dreaming when you see the growth in you and a life of possibilities, you will experience shifts in all levels; you will transfer this energy onto those around you, colleagues, friends, family and one by one you will transform peoples’ lives, just because you have taken ownership of your life and control of your dreams.

Realities are built upon dreams. Rome before it was built was dreamed of.

Find what it is you want and desire, respect how you feel about it, act on it, give it your all and make it happen. The world is your oyster. Hey, you can have your cake and eat it too!

Much love,

Jorge

mind and soul

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Seeking Guidance

Seeking Guidance

Believe you can do it

First of all, I would like to thank you for taking the time to read this blog and invest a bit of time in yourself, the most important person in the world and a perfect creation.

As we age we become very set in our ways, some people call it stubborn, others call it knowing what we want. Regardless of the name we give it, we aren’t doing ourselves any favours.

This stubbornness which we adopt quite simply as a mechanism of self-defence; which, by the way is quite normal, we want to protect ourselves from harm, strangers and even the unknown.

But by doing this, or being this way we miss out on real opportunities, growth being the number 1.

Why would this affect us? By being set in your ways, you are admitting you have a fixed mindset, it is either black or white (no shades of grey), all or nothing (there is no room from something), your way or no way.

Earlier in life, after having undergone my teenage years (which by the way were as dramatic as any other teenager), I learned and understood the importance of having a mentor, a person I could go to when I needed guidance or needed advice.

Having had a mentor much older than me, one of my college tutors; opened my eyes to a life of growth, options, possibilities and abundance.

This great mentor, whose name I have to mention Judith Atencio, expanded my horizons and reprogrammed my mindset.

I learned the importance of having an open mind, listening and being present, educating myself and reading; tools which I didn’t need at the time but helped me immensely in the years that follow.

The sole reason I share this with you is because as I life coach I believe we have to experience things in life, to then become the role model, speak from experience rather than through theory. Besides being a life coach, I am an experiential coach; I speak from my failures and successes, so I can share with others what has worked and hasn’t worked for me, not to influence people’s decision but to give them a different perspective.

When we come to a crossroads in life and realise we need to take a different route in life, try a new approach, I find the most important thing is to take ourselves out of the equation, practising mindfulness and being humble.

It is at this point we are able to admit we need help, and we can start looking for it; is it a person we need to help us? A book? A video? Etc.

What follows after that most important first step is a journey of learning and self-discovery, overcoming fears, conquering negative beliefs; exploring possibilities and expanding our mindset.

Once our mindset starts to grow, we are in the right direction to take control of our lives and whatever we put our minds to, we will achieve; it will be almost as if we can do magic, and this magic doesn’t come from ether, it comes from us, within us and from believe in ourselves.

Note. If this blog has helped in any way, do not hesitate to contact me and share with me your successes. I look forwards to hearing from you.

JV1

Self-Belief

Self-Belief

When we are born we have access to the unlimited knowledge of the universe, we know our purpose in this lifetime and we come with a plan of action, a step-by-step guide.

Suddenly, everything changes, we forget, we disconnect and we lose our focus. Do we, however, know what happens?

From really early in life we are shaped and affected by everything that surrounds us, noises, environment, animals, and people!!! It is this last factor that has a huge impact in our lives. At that moment of our growth we are creating our “map of the world”, we are learning what is and isn’t good, what is and isn’t important to us, etc.

At that age, as we have heard time and time again, we are like sponges and we are absorbing all that is around us, good and bad. We learn to speak, read, walk, play, we recreate what we see in our proximity.

But, at the same time when we are in that learning stage, subconsciously we are stacking our limiting beliefs up, which don’t show till later on as behaviours, habits and negative talk.

Before we carry on, I would like to say…

You are awesome

According to some studies these limiting beliefs we get or learn from family, neighbours, friends, teachers, media, etc.; which is unfair to say you would say, as these people love us and we put our trust in them.

To better understand this is worth noting the subconscious mind, which sole purpose is to protect us… does not understand negatives, FACT!!!

So when are little, and our siblings say to us: do not play with my toys, the first thing we will do is play with their toys, which will then end up in them being mean to us, and they may say things like you are useless, you are an idiot, you always screw up, you ruin everything…

We then grow up, and find ourselves in situations where people say to us similar things… you always screw up, you are useless, etc.

What is happening here?

Earlier in our lives when we were learning about life and creating our own map of the world and found ourselves being called names, told we were not good enough etc., our subconscious mind is programmed with that idea that we are not good enough and that’s when our belief systems our formed.

Then, what can we do to change that?

Firstly we need to acknowledge there is an area of concern, that something needs to be improved or changed.

Once we have figured out what this are of concern is, we identify how it impacts in our lives, work, family, socially, etc.; how we can improve it and determine if there is any positive intention in this “habit/behaviour”.

We then look at how we best learn and what type of therapy would work for us. You may need to see a therapist or quite simply be able to change these behaviours by yourself.

Essentially what are aiming to do is to reprogramme our subconscious mind, the way we see ourselves (value ourselves to be more accurate) and our map of the world.

[You will hear me talk about our “map of the world” quite a lot, as mentioned in one the previous blogs, this is our perspective and how we see things around us.]

This reimprinting or programming of new beliefs, doesn’t happen overnight, we have to work at it consistently and show true and 100% commitment to ourselves and our future.

If you aren’t making any progress, review your belief system and values; your dreams, wants and goals in life, ask yourself questions that will explore options and possibilities and not hinder your progress.

Our self-belief or self-esteem, which is the way we see ourselves, isn’t set on stone; it can be reshaped, altered and reprogrammed.

Do not forget we are the true Alchemists in our story, we can change anything as long as we make a decision to do so, have a plan of action in place and most importantly commit to it with a no matter what attitude until we free ourselves from our unwanted beliefs and create our lives by design.

There is only one person in control of your life and that is you. The choice is yours…

I BELIEVE IN YOU

Much love,

Jorge

Note. If this blog has helped in any way, do not hesitate to contact me and share with me your successes. I look forwards to hearing from you.

jorge final

Clear Direction

Clear Direction

Although we have access to the most incredible technology nowadays, and have tools we never even dreamed of; many people in our era find themselves stuck in a rut, frozen and unable to progress in life.

If you are in such situation you are most likely asking yourself WHY?

I put it simply, would you embark on a journey (it could be a holiday destination, recommended place, etc.), into the unknown without a map?

map

Your answer like the answer of many is an emphatic NO! I wouldn’t go to an unknown place without a map, that’s for sure!

So, to head in the “right” direction and follow our purpose in life we have to have a clear idea of what it is we want and what it would take to achieve it. In other words, we have to have goals in place.

Goal setting is the map and compass we need to create a step-by-step, easy to follow plan to help achieve our aims and desires in life.

A goal has to be SMART, it isn’t called SMART because it is an intelligent approach to completing tasks (which it 100% is!); it is an acronym for S, Specific. M, Measurable. A, Achievable. R, Realistic. And T, Time-framed.

Here is an example of Specific in goal setting, I want to earn £2550 a month. The amount of money mentioned is very exact.

The measurable element in goal setting basically means, how do you know you will have achieved it? Following the given example, I will know I have achieved my goal when I see the exact amount of money or more in my bank account. Achievable, can it be done? Has anyone ever earned £2550/per month, or do you know anyone who does? Realistic, are your skills up to date and worth that much money or do you need to improve or learn new ones? And Time-framed, when do you want to achieve this goal by?

Having SMART goals in place is just the beginning. Once we have our map (goals set), we work backwards; we start reading the map and see where we are and what needs to be done to move forward, and even to know when are lost or have had a setback in our journey.

A Gantt chart does just that, we chunk our goals up or down and we see a real and true break down of our goal and see our progress, at this moment we are able to determine whether our goal is too ambitious or unrealistic.

Example of a Gantt chart

gantt chart

Goals, just like affirmations are best set in the present and positively. It is good practice to visualise ourselves already achieving our goals, seeing it, hearing it, feeling it, smelling it and tasting it as if it were real. It is also important that it is written down, a written goal is twice as powerful as a non-written goal.

You know yourself better than anyone. Ask yourself the following questions: What do I want to do with my life? Is there anything stopping from achieving my dreams? If time wasn’t an issue what would I be doing right now? Or… and this is my favourite question: What did you dream of becoming when you were a child?

By questioning yourself, in a positive and constructive manner; you are making your brain think what is and what isn’t important to you.

We can look at it this way, if you want to become a teacher; realising that that is what you want, is like deciding to go on holidays. You then look at your skills, experience, etc., this would be like deciding where you want to go, budget, dates and so on. And finally once you get there having a clear idea of where to go, how to get there, etc., this is nothing more than goal setting, having a clear, accurate and effective way of carrying your tasks out and achieving your desires, wants and dreams in life.

Once you crack how to set goals, you can achieve anything in life. Goal setting or clear direction as I like to refer to it, can be extrapolated and applied to every area of our lives, moving houses, planning a family, buying a new car, starting your own business. You learn to take control of your life and go through the peaks and troughs like present us effortlessly, inspiring people to follow your example, do the same.

By having a clear idea of the general direction you are heading in life, you learn to see options and possibilities, and map your life out for success.

Much love,

Jorge

Note. If this blog has helped in any way, do not hesitate to contact me and share with me your successes. I look forwards to hearing from you.

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It’s all about our perspective

Following  a conversation I had with a taxi driver today and a recent coaching session with a client I have been reflecting and remembering the importance of perspective and how it can rule our lives.

Believe you can do it

According to the Oxford Dictionary we can define Perspective as: a particular attitude towards or way of regarding something; a point of view.

In simple terms I like to also call perspective: Our bias. Or in NLP (Neuro-Linguistic-Programming) terms: our map of the world.

In everyday life, at work, watching TV, at the supermarket etc., we come across people we believe to be nice or not. Other times we feel we have known someone forever when in reality we just met them. But why?

As we grow, our subconscious mind, records and keep an inventory of all things that have happened to us, as well as what we have done. Consciously we are unaware of what is happening at this level. From a very early age, our innate intelligence, or as other arguably would say our survival instinct kicks in and we form our personality; attitudes and behaviors that determine how we respond to everything around us.

But what if I was to tell you that it is all a mirage, a non existent belief we developed to get by; survive in a nut shell.

When we meet someone who triggers something in us, we feel anger, anxiety or sadness towards them, that feeling isn’t there, we put it there, we access a previous memory similar to what we are seeing/feeling/hearing and we translate it as anger. anxiety, etc.

So, how can we change this?

Easily, first of all, and it is perhaps the most difficult thing to do and that is to admit we need to change something about us or in us. Secondly, it is making a decision and commitment to change.

From there you find tools and exercises that resonate with you, and essentially what you want to do is to replace the habit you have, created or adopted (I also call these habits, beliefs), and introduce a counteracting habit. For example, if you have the perception or belief people in front of you at the checkouts are too slow; a good way to change it would be by trying to understand why you think they are too slow? Is it that you just buy essentials? And they are doing big shoppings? Do they have children? Are they elderly people?

Once you analyse the situation in depth, find ways to counterbalance these elements. If you find you are buying less things than the people in front of you, try going to a different checkout, shopping at different times or simply buying more things and less regularly.

The more you exercise your beliefs by analysing them, trying to understand them (their positive intention) and work with them rather than against them, you will find how beneficial it is, and you will realise you are in control of every situation, rather than situations control you.

Love,

Jorge

Healing the Self

Healing the Self

First and foremost I would like to clarify the real meaning of healing. Healing is the process and restoration of health or well-being from an unbalanced, diseased or damaged organism to a normal and “balanced” state.

So, why the importance of healing the self? The answer is simple, to bring ourselves into alignment with our purpose in life and lead a happy and fulfilling life.

I understand that it all sounds too easy, and it isn’t, it requires time, dedication and effort.  But once you achieve it you will start to notice the benefits.

What gives the authority to even touch on this subject?

Let me tell you a bit more about myself. I am a Life Coach and I specialise in Spiritual Coaching, also I am a Reiki Master Practitioner and Teacher, Energy Healer and Energy Psychologist. From my work I have learned the importance of keeping and cultivating a healthy Mind and Soul, how it affects our daily activities and our perception of the world around us.

You are probably asking yourself, OK, how do I heal the self? My mind and soul? Here is what has worked for me, it isn’t set on stone, give it a go and feel free to contact me to share your results.

It all begins with the desire to want to change and improve your life. By change I mean want to improve your standard of life and relationships or whatever you may want.

Once you have identified what needs changing. Keep a diary of it. Notice where it happens, who is involved, what you are doing at the time it happens. This could be a habit, an addiction or simply a behaviour you would like to change.

After you find what triggers you, sleep on it, meditate. Explore where it all stems from. It could be linked to an earlier incident in your childhood or teen years; a belief you created to protect yourself and has continued to hinder your progress in life.

When you face your trigger, do what you can to walk away from it; take a deep breath in or count up to 10. If you manage to successfully avoid any confrontation or set back, ask yourself: What can I do next time to not find myself in similar situations? Where did it go wrong? Did I get myself into this intentionally?

Listen to the answers you get and do not dismiss them, written them down in your journal if you have any, or start one.

All good so far but how do it heal myself? You are probably asking yourself.

The next step is to explore the “underworld” of the subconscious mind, that place where we bury memories and emotions that we found hurtful and dangerous; yes, we step into those areas of our mind we wished we never had to face again.

There is three ways we can work in this underworld or battlefield of the mind, these are:

  • Meditation, simply by closing our eyes holding that emotion, feeling or nothingness and chasing it; allowing whatever we get to come forward to reveal itself, then do your very best to find the correlation with the situation. For example if you have is irritability and everyone triggers you, no matter where you are or what you do, everything irritates you. Hold that state of irritability as you close your eyes and allow your innate intelligence, your inner cosmos to take where it feels you need to go to. See what see, hear what you hear and feel what you feel. Once an image comes to mind, let it develop in your mind and see the relevance and notice where it takes you to, stay there as long as it takes. At the end, write down any information or revelations you may have had from the experience. Do it as often as you feel it is necessary and beneficial to you. I personally prefer to keep it as a daily ritual where I explore my inner world after any negative and see where I need to work on.
  • Matrix Reimprinting. What the…? I can hear you say… Let me tell you a bit more about Matrix Reimprinting. Matrix Reimprinting is a fairly new therapy, it is a technique derived from EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques), which has been around for over 20 years. In EFT you “tap” on specific tapping points which correlate to meridians found in the body, it is like acupuncture but without the needles. In Matrix Reimprinting the Practitioner taps on the client, or you tap on yourself as you step into the “Matrix”, which is all around us and accessible to us at any time. In here we use the concept of Quantum Physics. Once you go into the matrix, you replay the scene or memory that “troubles” you; the only limit is your imagination. Your goal is to “alter” or “change” aspects of the memory you feel are the cause to your “issues”. You can work on the matrix as often as needed, and change as many elements as you find necessary. At the end you “reimprint” the new memory and it gets sent to the heart centre, “our true mind”. Many people feel the benefits of this therapy with only one session, others may need 5 or more.
  • Energy healing, there are many forms of energy healing, I will only touch on Reiki on here. Reiki literally means Universal Energy, which is all around us and accessible to all at any time. This wonderful energy is available to all, however, in order to feel the “true” Reiki experience you have to either be initiated into Reiki or go to Reiki Practitioner to feel this energy. What Reiki does is it released blocked energy from the body; it is these blockages that become negative emotions, illness, disease and beliefs. The Reiki Energy is so smart that it goes where it is required, the practitioner may direct the energy specifically where it is needed or the energy simply travels where it is most needed. The more Reiki you get, the more you are able to notice the difference, you see the clarity in issues, that there isn’t a victim or a perpetrator, we simply co-create the reality we manifest, simply put, we are all guilty or victims of our own actions. As the saying goes: it takes two to tango. Reiki has been around for over 100 years, however, energy healing has been available for millennia, we just forgot about it.

These three simple yet so powerful tools, can so positively help you move towards your happier, fuller and more whole self.

Another easy technique and perhaps the most powerful of all is the tact. When was last time you physically gave yourself a pat on the back? Or gave yourself a hug? Or just put your hands on your heart and felt it beat?

We forget, how wonderful it feels to feel our skin, the hairs on our body, or just being aware of our breath. What I would suggest, is daily spend some time with yourself, 5, 10, 15 minutes or however long you can afford.

What is your body telling you? Open your third eye or intuition and pay attention what your body tells you. Is it asking you to rest? Is it telling you you need to eat? Or is thanking you for recharging your batteries and getting in touch with it.

As children, we all experience how our parents rush towards us when we fall off our bicycles and graze our body, the hug us, kiss us and make all go away, simply being there works for us. Then, why not do the same for ourselves when we have a bad day? When nothing seems to go right in our lives…

I invite you and encourage you to rekindle your relationship with your body and your “self”; heal it by being kind to it and being present, eat healthily, exercise, treat it to a pampering weekend, and let go of your worries. And on a daily basis touch your “temple”, your body and send it love, send it kindness; and it will reciprocate.

I look forwards to hearing from you and how see how you got on.

Much love,

Jorge

Choices make a day good or bad!

Choices make a day good or bad!


How many times do we hear people saying one of the following?

My day could not get any worse! – Nah, I’ve had better days! – It could be worse! – It goes from bad to worse! –  Bad things happen in threes!

Does it sound familiar?

To most of us this is a daily occurrence when we engage in conversations with others. There are even times we fall into the trap and we find ourselves too whinging non-stop!

What if I told you, from the second we wake up, we are making the choice to either have good or bad day? It may sound too good to be true, but is a true, sadly for most.

I will explain how what we do and think shape the decisions we make.

But first I would like to share with you a little story. Back in 2002 when I moved to the UK from The Americas I found myself in a new environment, with far too much time in my hands and I had nothing to kill it with, inevitably it affected my self-esteem as you could imagine; crazy thoughts invaded my head, and I would try anything to walk away from solitude, boredom and having to learn a new language. That’s right English isn’t my first language, so I apologise in advance if certain things do not make sense, or words are the other way around!

In one of my low moments, after constant self-sabotage I decided to man up and tackle the issue at hand i.e. the way I felt so I went onto the net and on the search engine bar I typed “What is the secret of happiness?” I was gobsmacked to the fact that people had thought of asking the very same question before and worse still an answer or many answers should I say, had been uploaded onto the net!!!

So I proceeded to read and there were two stories that did really stand out, I will only touch on one for today though.

It went like this, how many times I hear people complaining and whinging about their lives! People having a bad day at work, hating their boss, missing the bus or simply having to queue for a coffee! So, what I’d do is to say, do you mind if I ask you five questions? To which many would reply yes (quite confused!). Did you have breakfast this morning? An affirmative reply would be mumbled. Do you have a roof over your head? Same again. Did you wake up to a nicely ironed suit? At this point I could see many people’s faces starting to change, and in many occasions I would not even have to finish the questions as by this point they would realise their worries or problems were not that important.

It was reading this that I had my eureka moment or epiphany. Whether I had a good or bad day it was all down to me. If I chose to let my next door neighbour get on my nerves, I made that choice, likewise if I decided to let it go and ignore it, it was my choice too.

Sadly it took me a little longer than I imagined to really figure out what was meant on that article. I read it for the first time at the age of 19 and it wasn’t until I was in my late 20’s that I really “got” it.

With my background in sciences, my passion for spirituality, management and leadership skills I was open to the “nonsense” of choosing to have a good day or a bad one. In my mid-teens I read a book on NLP – Neuro Linguistic Programming – where amongst learning styles there was a section on self-esteem and limiting beliefs, which stayed in the back of my head for many years. So I guess I was not at all ready to apply what I “thought” I knew.

Many years passed, life passed, I grew older and experienced more of life. Or perhaps, it would be more accurate to say life taught me a few lessons, which thank god I chose to pay attention to.

And after having woken up and practiced what I knew, rather than preaching it, I started to see a change in the way my days went on; my relations and communications with people improved, and better still the way I felt about myself changed forever and continues to be. I simply chose on a daily basis to have a great day, nothing drastic or major, just small steps to feel better and enjoy every day as it came.

In the last 2 years I have reaped the benefits of choosing to have a good day and I would love to share it with you, so you too can feel the benefits.

So here is a quick summary of some key principles of what I have learned in order to have a good day or in this case to choose to have a good day:

  1. Open you heart. I used to say to people, I love you with all my brain, as I used to believe the brain controlled the heart, how wrong was I! The brain has its own memory and according to some researches the heart receives information before the brain does. When you look at someone lovingly they perceive it and send love back to you, and the opposite is also true, if you remain closed emotionally people will also notice it and treat accordingly, treat people the way you would like to be treated, with love and kindness, and all of that starts with the self, You, if you have been hurt, maybe, and I stress maybe, the person you haven’t yet forgiven (and perhaps the most important of them all!) is You. Begin by accepting and loving yourself for who and what you are. When you learn to love yourself and accept your flaws you will start to notice the difference, your heart will heal and open.
  2. Mindfulness. Another misconception I had was that mindfulness was just being mindful of other people and their emotions. Mindfulness is all about being present, living the now, letting go of the past and not worrying about the future. It is as simple as enjoying drinking a glass of water, being aware of the water in the glass, the water touching your lips and not forgetting that what you are drinking is water; another example giving your full attention to someone, putting the mobile phone down during dinner, etc.
  3. Use affirmations, or positive talk. Rather than punishing yourself and abusing yourself 24/7, be your best cheerleader by using affirmations and use positive language. An affirmation (which should be stated in the present and positively) is a sentence we repeat over and over, so it sinks into the subconscious mind until it happens or become true. Repetition is the key to success, remember success mean different things to each of us; being kind to yourself can be tricky and the biggest success you will ever achieve.
  4. Eat well. We constantly hear, we are what we eat yet no one really explains what is meant by it. I understand we live in a very demanding society where at work we are expected to do much more than we are paid for, commuting, the stress of the current economic climate, etc., I get it I have been there. Food is energy, if you eat heavy meals your body will demand much more energy to digest the saturated fats, refined carbohydrates, etc., so rather than working with your body and using its natural engine, you are working against it, wasting fuel, wasting energy and with each mouthful of food you are slowing yourself down and feeling worse off. Eating well also means keeping yourself hydrated, not with fizzy drinks or caffeinated drink, but water, which helps detoxify the body and reenergises the engine.
  5. Smile. Yes Smile! When you wake up, look at your reflection in the mirror and smile at yourself, set yourself up for a great start. If you consciously say to yourself, that’s it, today I will not let anything spoil or ruin my day, I will be present, open my heart and respect myself, I choose to have a fantastic day; you will notice your day will go smoothly or at least better than when you wake up complaining of the day ahead. If you feel you can’t smile, guess what you can do? Fake it till you believe it, fake it until it comes naturally, trust me it works!
  6. Meditate, reflect upon your day. One thing I found many of us, myself included do not do enough of, is reflect on the day gone, think what could have I done differently? What could have I said differently? Run the movie in your head of what it would have been like had you or the other people involved done it the imagined way? There is an incredible therapy called Matrix Reimprinting where you can rerun the movie in your head and build it the way you would have liked it to be and reap the benefits by surrogacy. Another method of achieving similar results is by meditating and getting in touch with our godly essence and learn from it, the more we practice it the more we get into the zone, where there’s no worries or fears, and all is love and possible.
  7. Be compassionate, empathetic. How many times do we forget other people have lives too! We forget people struggle the same way we do, people have financial worries, lose loved ones, people generally have bad days too!!! Fact! So deal with it. You are not alone, Bill next door has his own issues to deal with, why not rather than locking horns when something goes wrong, just say: It is OK, not to worry we can sort it out later! Discuss it another time or simply approach it in a calm manner, like adults with understanding and empathy. If you have a volatile personality, leave the room, walk away from the situation until you cool down and can tackle it more objectively. It isn’t easy but practice makes perfect, try it one day and the next, and the next until it becomes a habit. Your overall health will thank you for it.
  8. Practice gratitude! How often do we take for granted everything we have? I can honestly say I forget too often! Be grateful for the roof over your head, your health, your family, your job (although you may not feel it), your vision, your hearing, for making it through the night alive. I grew up in a family that use to say grace before every meal, and because I was immature I could not realise what grace was all about. It took me almost two decades to figure it out, “to get it”, that grace is just that gratitude for our daily bread; we have no idea of how many people around the globe would die to have our leftovers, or a fraction of our plate. So why not honour it and thank your boss for employing you, your wife/husband/maid for cooking it, the grocers for stocking the ingredients up, the farmer for growing the vegetables and rearing the animals, the wind for spreading the seeds so the plants could grow, the sun for allowing the seeds to spring, and the list goes on and on. And do not forget to thank the most important person in the equation, yourself, for working hard, earning the money and providing for your family.
  9. Exercise, mobility and fitness. When was the last time you went for a country walk and smelled the freshly mowed grass? When was the last time you ran for miles that you forgot how good it feels to be alive? When we exercise we release endorphins and these endorphins send signals to the brain that make us feel happy, content and satisfied with the world and ourselves. When we exercise we are present and nothing else matters, we may do it for many reasons, vanity, necessity, companionship, etc., it doesn’t matter what your agenda it, either way you are oiling the engine up, you fuel it up when you eat, and exercising allows it to run how it is meant to, effortlessly. We hear often enough, our bodies are our temples, so why not look after it, keep it in good condition. Would you like to live in a building that is falling apart or in a modern, funky and exciting building? The choice is yours. Walk whenever possible, breath fresh air, do some stretches. Your joints and muscles will thank you in the long run.
  10. Finally, and I find it is the most important piece of advice I can give you educate yourself. What? I can hear you say. How does the saying go? Knowledge is power… So why not gain that knowledge and use the power to our advantage? There are countless books in so many subjects, they may all seem different, but the underlying message is still the same, to improve and better ourselves. We have come so far as a civilization, from our cave days to an era of incredible and mind blowing technology, we all we need is at our finger tips. Knowledge isn’t about being a know-it-all, a brainiac or a nerd, knowledge is about understanding, but of the self. Think, how can you be better? What can you do to make your day better than the day before or a year before? The more we learn and apply what we learn the more responsive we become, our overall attitude towards live changes, and this doesn’t necessarily mean you have to change, I am a great believer we don’t change, we evolve, not only biologically, but spiritually and mentally too. When you educate yourself you realise, there is no need to lose your temper or swear or cry; let it be, let it go and learn from the experience, analyse it and say to yourself what can I do differently tomorrow so it doesn’t happen again? Try it, give a go, pick a book up, and with an open mind absorb its message.

I firmly believe if you use these key principles, one at the time, two or more at the time or all of them at the time you will feel and see the difference. We hear people often say, I wish this or that person could change, but what about us? Are we 100% perfect? Don’t think so. In fact no one needs to change, we ought to evolve and strive towards our magic essence, the divine perfection we all have deep inside of us.

A great role model and inspiration of mine, a public speaker Jim Rohn says we are the average of the 5 people closest to us, take a good look at the people you are spending your time with, are they propelling you towards where you want to be? Or just hindering your every move? I am not by all means saying you must alienate people from your life, rather watch and listen to them, are they positive, optimistic people who choose to have a god day? Or a complainer, whinger and moaner? If the latter is the case, then think; do I want to be like them? Continue to choose to have bad days? Ask yourself, how can I help my dearest and nearest to be positive and optimistic?

Be the beacon that shines the light of optimism in everyone lives. Be the one who always has an amazing day, because you choose it to be that way. Be the person who everyone wants to hang out with. Be the best version of yourself.

Hey, I am only here to advice you on the little I know, the choice is yours.

Much Love,

Jorge

P.s I would love to hear from you and any comments or feedback you may have.