3 Lessons Learned In 2018 So Far

3 Lessons Learned In 2018 So Far


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Years come and go, I still remember years in the 80’s, 90’s and 00’s when I didn’t have the awareness I now possess, and I simply got through the years, and decades without learning a single thing and stagnating.

Thankfully things changed when I started in personal development AND educating myself about life in general.

Now, I get from the day rather than through the day AND whatever good or bad comes my way I learn from it and I become a better and stronger person, increasing my resilience and self-belief.

What have I learned from 2018 in less than 3 weeks?

For some of readers this may sound obvious, for others this may be a new insight, and a breakthrough, remember one solution doesn’t always work for everyone else.

3 lessons learned in 2018 so far

  1. Time isn’t what it seems, time become more flexible when we learn to apply it and work with it. Leverage is the key to getting things done, it isn’t the person with the most hours or more minutes that gets the job done, it is the person with the most leverage that succeeds AND gets their tasks finished. I learned this through sheer planning and scheduling and learning where to invest my time and when to say no, the result? It is having more time to do what I want to do and spending the time with my loved ones.
  2. Discipline is the blood and sweat of success, I have heard this, so many times and I thought I was disciplined but I was not maxing out on my potential, there was more room for improvement, there was another level I wasn’t getting to. So far, I have put strategies in place to write daily, to exercise daily, to something I love daily, to eat my meals at the right time, to eat healthily AND to spend my time where it matters the most and where I am going to see best results. I guess it could be said this was my new year’s resolution and I have put into practice what I know, AND it is paying off. I am proud to say that I have achieved more in 3 weeks than I did previously in 3 months!!!
  3. A compassionate approach to life, as a vegan I often read and listened about compassion to the animals, the environment and other humans. So, this word has been stuck in my head and I have been toying with the idea of being more compassionate and loving and caring and present to other humans and myself. One other thing I love about the word compassion is that if we break apart into its two components we have com = with, and passion, with passion; I have started to live my life more passionately and lovingly, caring for things and people that need caring, I have learned to not neglect myself, I am taking better care of myself and it is paying off as I am more effective with everything I do.

In the last 3 weeks I have been making sure that I get from the day as much as I possibly can, not only because I am investing in my life but also because I am curious to know what areas need to be improved, where am I really good at? What areas are my weakest? Etc.

As I have mentioned before there are two types of people:

  • The one who get through the day, getting nothing from it, they are just relieved the day is over, and
  • The ones who get from the day, getting wisdom and lessons from it and enriching the quality of their lives by paying attention to the things that unfold in front of them.

In Summary

You can either get from the day or through the day, if you choose to get from the day, like me, why not keep a journal and write your lessons down and share them with the world?

Thank you for reading.

With all my love,

Jorge

 

 

 

5 Tips To Stay On Track With Your Goals

5 Tips To Stay On Track With Your Goals


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We are more than half way through the month, we have seen resolutions been born and gone, frustration here and there, reality kicks in and we feel rather sh*t about the year and ourselves.

What can we do to stay on track?

For years I struggled with that too and it was challenging to remain strong and finish strong, staying focused and achieving my goals.

You are in luck today as I am sharing with you what I learned through the years and what worked best to stay on track.

5 tips to stay on track with your goals:

  1. Have a deadline, as crazy as it may sound some of us never EVER set a deadline, having a deadline is key to any goal, it is law that when you give yourself a time frame to finish something that’s how long it will take you, for example if you are building a house and you don’t set a deadline it can take you forever to finish and not only that but it will cost you a lot of money and emotional stress too. What is the goal you are working on? How long are you giving yourself to do it? Is it realistic? Who do you know who has done similar task? Have these questions in mind when setting a deadline, being realistic and driven can make a huge difference in any project.
  2. Have accountability, when I wrote my first book Growing Confident, I was telling everyone I was writing a personal development book and I was making them part of the project, in the end it took me 21 days to write the book, 3 months to publish it AND it gave me so much confidence in myself and my abilities. Currently I am accountable for two things writing a fiction book and writing 15 thousand words by the 1st of February. Will I get it done on time? 100% because I don’t want to let people down, people are taking some of their time to keep an eye on me and by not doing it I am letting them down and myself!!! Who do you know in your circle of friends or professionals who can hold you accountable to your actions AND to whom you can pay the favour forward by doing the same? Win-win scenarios win all the time.
  3. Be flexible, when you have a deadline and the time arrives and you haven’t completed your goal, that is ok! Life doesn’t always go as planned, that’s why being flexible is key and paramount. There is presupposition in NLP, Neuro-Linguistic Programming, which says: the person with the most flexibility controls the system, better explained if you are flexible you will find ways to make things work for you. The number one reason why people fail at anything is the lack of flexibility. Winners and achievers are flexible, what this really means is they are learning from their mistakes and using these feedbacks to their advantage. Where are you at in relation to your goal? How can you be more flexible? What would having more flexibility give you? Are you being flexible in your life?
  4. Have a contingency plan, a plan is a strategy and if one doesn’t work, would you give up just like that? Having a plan B or a contingency plan gives you an advantage over yourself and other people (depending on the task); often most people put ALL of their eggs in one basket and when it is gone, that’s it! This goes in alignment with being flexible and having a deadline, if your goal is taking longer than planned, would you park it and give up? Let’s say you are losing weight and you gave yourself 2 months to lose 1 st and you only lose 9 lbs, would you quit when you only have another 5 lbs to go? The deadline didn’t work, perhaps you didn’t explore other avenues to lose the 5 lbs in the time frame agreed, this type of scenario is when a contingency plan comes in handy, perhaps you could exercise more, take on some cardio classes, eat less carbs, and so… When you start a new goal, explore different avenues and different outcomes.
  5. Be kind to yourself, for years any time anything failed I would be kicking myself, I’d talk to myself in ways I wouldn’t allow anyone to talk to me, yet I was doing it myself. Then I started to be kind to myself and, forgive myself for not getting the results I wanted and forgetting about these mistakes. I discovered that hating or even disliking myself was being counterproductive AND I was in a worse off place at the end of it. If things aren’t going the way you planned them that is OK, what are you learning from it, be kind to yourself and get on with whatever you must do to accomplish your goal.

These are the 5 tips I have found really useful throughout the years and I have seen many positive results by remembering these.

Why not share these tips with your family and friends too?

Thank you for reading, till next time,

 

Jorge

Lessons Learned Through Modern Energy Art

Lessons Learned Through Modern Energy Art


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Nothing in life is worth doing if we aren’t learning any lessons from it, either good or bad lessons.

For as long as I can remember I have been a student of life, I guess I have one of those personalities where I have to have answers and if the people I ask don’t have them and I get to work and I do whatever it takes to get those answers.

I believe there are no mistakes or errors or booboos of f*ck ups in life, simply feedback and lessons, we will continue to “mess up” until we learn these lessons and then eventually move on.

Recently talking to a friend I commented on how blessed I was, as for most of my life I have learned through other people’s “mistakes” and “testimonials”, so my learning curve has been rather quick and pleasant too.

In personal development it is said that the first step for change is: awareness.

When you have awareness you literally see magic unfold before your very eyes and EVERYTHING seems to ‘make sense’, it is a great feeling and life becomes a walk in the park.

But what happens when you don’t have this awareness?

Truthfully, not much!!! Life, work, romance, you name it, these things do NOT seem to work at all; we are stressed, ‘under pressure’, we feel useless, overwhelming feelings, etc., etc.

Without awareness life isn’t as joyous or fun. Without it, you don’t know what you are doing right or ‘wrong’, what mistakes are being made, what needs to be improved, whether what you are doing works or not. Simple tasks can take up to twice as long, EVERYTHING becomes a burden or a chore!

If you are like me (especially if you are in personal development), there comes a point when you get to the ‘good stuff’ in your life, and by this I mean the stuff that has not being dealt with before AND this is when real and incredible transformation starts to take place.

Though, two things tend to occur here:

  1. We might not want to talk to anyone, for various reasons; or,
  2. We have no idea what is holding us back.

So, if we don’t have this ‘awareness’ to solve a ‘problem’ because we don’t want to talk about or because we don’t know what it is, what do we do?

More personal development? Or, try something new?

I guess this would be a very personal choice and I will share what I did and what insight and awareness it shone into my life.

Modern Energy Art

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When we talk or hear Art, we immediately thing of Picasso, Da Vinci, Michelangelo, etc., people that history has told us are the greatest and most amazing artists EVER, and when we see their art we either think: what a masterpiece or what the hell!

I grew up thinking I was not good at drawing, never mind art.

Memories from childhood would haunt me, having to draw vases, or fruit baskets, or landscapes (the idea of art would trigger the hell out of me!); so, it’d end up either asking my mum to do it for me OR paying my cousin to do it for me.

Arts and Sports were my nemesis at school!

Every time I was colouring something in I’d go out of the edges and I’d lose my temper. In a nutshell, I quit the idea of EVER being an artist at a very young age.

There was no hope in hell for me as an artist, or at least I thought that.

In order for healing to occur and take place something magical has to happen or be done; though, in my experience our instinct (or 6th sense) always knows and when we listen to it we give this healing permission to take place.

I am blessed to say that I ‘almost’ always listen to my 6th sense and when I don’t I regret it immediately.

So, last year a friend, mentor and role model, Silvia Hartmann announced she’d be opening a coaching programme called: Modern Energy Art Apprenticeship; the second I heard about it I knew I had to do it.

However, at first, I made every excuse under the sun as to why I couldn’t do it:

  • Time,
  • Money,
  • Energy,
  • Was it worth it,
  • Do I have all the resources needed,
  • I am not an artist!,
  • What if I can’t do it, etc.

The typical excuses we all make and the ones I encourage my clients to dismiss when they REALLY want something!

Here is the thing, Silvia only opened it to 12 people and the spaces were flying real quick, as many people I suffer from F.O.M.O (fear of missing out), so every time she announced there was another space gone my heart would skip a beat.

I was sat on the fence for days and when there were only two spaces left I jumped in.

So, I got to work and I emailed Silvia for my first task! Originally the idea of doing art by myself without a tutor or teacher by my side was terrifying.

I loved how everything started! Silvia simply asked:

What were your first memories of art?

That was easy for me to answer: I loved playing with crayons when I was a child, I loved the freedom of doodling on the paper for hours on end, the smell of the wax and feeling of the crayons on the paper.

As I was typing the answer I had my first breakthrough and insight! I saw how this was a great investment, opportunity and the vehicle I needed to move to the next level AND I was thankful to my 6th sense for guiding me to it.

Then we moved onto the first drawing, an egg, what a metaphor! The beginning and birth of something new…

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So, I did my first egg, it was painted using crayons. When I was drawing and painting the egg I was a child again, full of hope and dreams, the joy and love that irradiated from me at that moment was so healing and powerful that I lost track of time.

The feeling was so addictive that I did 2 more eggs and I had another insight:

I realised how much I judged people! I used to comment about people who were buying colouring books and colouring in instead of getting one with their work and lives; I learned I was the one missing out, I was the one who wasn’t healing nor giving myself the time to reenergise or clear my mind.

More tasks came in and I was producing even more paintings, when I thought I couldn’t paint or do any form of art.

Second insight:

I was making excuses for the sake of making excuses! How can I know I can’t do anything if I don’t give it a go? I couldn’t draw as a child but that doesn’t mean I can’t do it as an adult!

As the days, weeks and months went through I was learning so much about myself, without even looking for these answers!!!

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I started to notice improvements in other areas of my life too!

Lessons learned through Modern Energy Art:

  1. I judged people without knowing their motives for doing what they were doing,
  2. I was making excuses for the sake of making them,
  3. I discovered how much of a perfectionist I was and how it was holding me back!,
  4. I realised I dislike the idea of being told what to AND following instructions/systems,
  5. I learned that in order to solve a problem, I must focus on the solution instead of the problem,
  6. When you are ready to be healed the healing event will manifest itself,
  7. Best healing occurs without words,
  8. Energy is ever present and the more Energy you put into something, the more you will get out,
  9. You are responsible for your happiness and joy, you ought to look for what’s missing,
  10. Intuition is everything, our 6th sense is there for a reason, lets use it,
  11. Energy well spent is Energy well invested,
  12. I learned I can do anything and that I am unstoppable, I am the only one who can stop me,
  13. I learned that the past really doesn’t define me, it is what I do in the now that does,
  14. Art isn’t rocket science, it is a form of self-expression therefore an Energy exchange,
  15. I am creative and not just an Artist, but a Modern Energy Artist,
  16. I discovered that I am awesome,
  17. I learned to love my creations, people’s opinions count but they aren’t everything,
  18. I learned to give myself a pat on the back, I am creating magic in my life,
  19. I realised the importance of feedback and how powerful and healing it can be,
  20. I learned there is so much more to discover about me and that I am only getting started!

I have taken a small selection of the lessons I have learned so far, it pleases to know I made the right decision when I took on this programme and how far I have come.

Energy is awareness and it is this what moves us forward and closer to our enlightenment and the life of our dreams.

In conclusion

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Energy art is not just art, it is a self-healing tool where you the artist creative art as well as evolve and learn valuable lessons about yourself and your life.

You grow, you evolve, you discover what you are capable of.

Magic appears in your life, stays in your soul and you continue to sparkle towards your awesomeness.

What’s not to like?

Thank you so much for reading and comment on this post and let me know your experiences with art either as an artist or as a admirer.

Till next time,

Jorge

The Importance Of KISSing

The Importance Of KISSing

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I got your attention, right?

Sadly I am not going to talk to you about kissing!

What I want to talk to you about is the importance of Keeping It Simple Stupid…

Why is it important to keep things simple and somehow basic?

Because the more complex and complicated the execution of anything, and I mean any project, job or task, the more likely it is to end up as an act of procrastination, or an end product/result you aren’t 100% satisfied with.

What do you know when your project/task is simple enough?

It is said that real genius is when you can explain anything to a 5 year old and they get it.

Also, you know your project is simple enough when you see yourself achieving it, it doesn’t overwhelm you and it makes you want to get on with it by taking immediate action.

A word of advice here is, do NOT let the idea that just because it is simple fool you, anything you want to get and achieve in your life requires immediate action, there is no time like the now.

If you are lacking confidence in yourself or an overall lack of direction as to how to tackle your goals, help is always available, shop around, ask others and find someone who can help you grow in confidence and become successful. Click here to visit my website.

The secret to any success is to have a simple and easy to follow system that will get you where you want to be.

Complex tasks and projects lead to disappointment and overwhelm.

Simple and easily structured tasks and projects lead to self-belief and certainty in oneself.

Remember, if you have a project you want to tackle and achieve successfully, simply give it a good KISS by keeping it simple stupid.

Till next time,

Jorge

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How to create from nothing?

How to create from nothing?

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Intriguing title, don’t you think?

You might be wondering what I mean by creating from nothing, right?

Just imagine you are a builder, you have what at first appears to be an empty plot of land and you are assigned the task to build a house in that space of nothing.

The idea of starting with nothing and somehow ending up with something after some work could seem almost impossible for some, terrifying for others and some, well, wouldn’t even start!

Though, the reality is that you get many more choices when you start with nothing or from nothing.

When you have nothing, what that really means is you can have anything, you get to call the shots, you get to choose what is built.

You can build the house as big as your imagination allows you to, you can use whatever materials you want to use, you can be as creative as your heart desires.

Starting with nothing gives you a clean canvas in which you get to decide what goes on it, you choose the paints you want to use, you get to choose the brushes you want to use and you also get to choose how long it will take to complete the masterpiece.

If you are struggling to grasp that concept it is ok, I am going to give you an even easier to get analogy:

We start with nothing, as nothing!

Get it?

We are all born the same, naked, vulnerable and with nothing.

It is with time we get to create the life we desire, we choose what we do or don’t do with our lives. When we are adults or even before then, we choose our friends, partners, schools, jobs, etc.

What we get, always start from nothing, with nothing.

We start with nothing and we then choose to have something.

That something could be anything we wish; though, it is our circumstances and past experiences that steer us in the direction of the things we get in life.

So, in a nutshell, you get to choose what happens next in your life.

You are the artist who gets to paint the blank canvas, you are the author of your life who gets to write on the empty page.

You start with nothing and therefore have the potential to have EVERYTHING.

I hope you have enjoyed today’s post.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

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Aligning Your Thoughts With What You Want

Aligning your thoughts with what you want

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I remember many years ago when I heard of The Secret for the very first time, I was extremely excited, I could not believe we had finally found that missing bit of information that would enables to have the lives we always wanted AND most importantly effortlessly…

The reality is, it was too simple!

It was just too easy and always hard to believe that we could have anything, just by the power of our thoughts and The Law of Attraction.

So, I guess this concept put some people off (I was more cynical than put off by it – if I am being honest), and some interest was lost.

Saying this, I want to share with you how I have learned to interpret the message in The Secret and The Law of Attraction.

When we want something in life, be it a car, or a new partner, or to get that promotion at work; regardless of what it is, it ALL start as a thought, a single thought.

This thought gives birth to an idea of what life can be life when (see how I am saying when not IF!), we get that car, or meet our new partner, or get that promotion; this idea when decorated with all the different possibilities and what it will do for us is what we call a Vision.

In very simple words:

A Vision is seeing things the way they can be, not the way they are.

So, we have a thought which then becomes a vision and then what?

This is when The Law of Attraction comes in… this is the moment when we align our thoughts with that vision, we write it down as a goal or well-formed outcome that will inspire us, we get creative and make ourselves a nice vision board of what our lives will look like when we get what we want, we visualise ourselves being there, doing those things and enjoying the rewards.

However, it isn’t that easy, we have to do a few things that will help us materialise this goal or vision, these are:

  1. Action: a goal without action is just a dream, and dreams do not come true if we don’t do a single thing to make them happen… So, get to work if you want that vision to become a reality.
  2. Have a why: a why is the reason we do what we do, is why we get up at ridiculous o’clock to do what it takes to make that vision a reality.
  3. Remind ourselves of our goal/vision: if you aren’t familiar with visualisation, affirmations, goal setting or vision boards, I would encourage you to find out more, these tools help to remind us of what it is we want and why we are doing it. So, why do we need reminding? This internal repetition of our goal/vision is what will help us find the how, which is the strategy that will get us there, the more we think about our goal, the more we will be working in ways to make it a reality. And,
  4. Empowering habits: there always is a reason why we haven’t that what we want… let me explain this, if we had a way to get that car, partner or job we wouldn’t even bother thinking about it. However, the main reason we don’t have those things is because we do not have the skills or strategies to get them, so developing empowering habits is fundamental to ensure we accomplish our goals.

The truth is, there is no secret to The Secret, if there was a secret it would be:

Do what you know you have to do to create the results you want.

Rome wasn’t built in one day, it took years, decades to become the empire it did.

Can you imagine it Rome was built in one day? Surely, they wouldn’t have become the empire they did if they hadn’t built the solid foundations to support and guard their people.

The same applies to our goals, they become a reality once we have built the foundations in which they can materialise.

I hope you have enjoyed today’s read.

With all my love,

 

Jorge

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How to have the best year yet?

How to have the best year yet?

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Have you ever asked yourself:

What do I have to do to have the best year I’ve ever had?

Or,

What can I do to be better than last year?

If you are like me, I am sure you may have asked yourself this countless times.

So, how do we have the best year yet?

The answer is very simple:

Say no to your excuses.

Say no to what you’d normally say yes to.

Be the person who says no…

  • Be the person who says no to distractions,
  • Be the person who says no to tv,
  • Be the person who says no to alcohol,
  • Be the person who says no to procrastination.

When you start saying no it may seem uncomfortable at first, and as soon as you start seeing the results in your life it will start to become easier and easier.

What do you have to do to have the best year yet?

What is it you want?

We all know what we have to do to get from A to B, we just don’t do it. The secret here is to go above and beyond our excuses and say: I know I don’t want to do this and I am doing it anyway.

I know this is tedious and I am doing it anyway.

I want to spend some time doing nothing and I am going to get on with my work, my studies, work towards my goals, anyway.

In brief, what we have to do to have the best year yet is to do the complete opposite to what we have always done, do more of the things that have to be done, do what we know have to be done to get the results we want.

Achieving success and accomplishing our goals aren’t exclusive to “the chosen” ones, this is available to everyone, especially the ones who put in the hard work.

Do you want to have the best year yet?

Just work, work and work towards it and in the end you will reap the rewards.

Have a great day,

 

Jorge

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How are you feeding your mind in 2017?

How are you feeding your mind in 2017?

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Hello there, I trust you are having a great day so far and that 2017 is treating you well so far (it is only day 2!).

I would like to thank you for your beautiful comments in yesterday’s post, truth be told I wanted to make people think about the year ahead and how they can ensure they have the bestest year yet.

So, today is no different.

I am sure those of you who are Entrepreneurs and/or in the Personal Development field are familiar with the saying:

“Learners are Earners”

I could not agree more with that statement.

I am very fortunate that when I was growing up I had the best Spanish and Literature professors, they taught me so much and made me fall in love with my language and reading; so the day I don’t have my hands all over a book, the day I do not caress the pages in a hardback (or paperback), I feel I am missing out.

My personal library has thousands of books that I have devoured over the years (in England alone), and it just continues to grow.

Over the festive period I read like there was no tomorrow, I wanted to enrich my mind and my being. Sadly, I ran out of books to read (yes, I was upset!!!).

Yesterday, New Year, the very first day of the year I had nothing to enrich my life, my mind and me being. So, I had this thought:

Wouldn’t it be a good idea if from now on, before the year ends I get myself 12 books – one for every month of the year –, for the year ahead?

Do you remember, me talking about my wheel of life and goal setting? One thing I just realised is that by buying books that are in alignment with our goals is a great way to ensure we achieve them!

I invite you to take a look at your goals and do some research on what books and authors could help you achieve them.

I am a great believer that in order to achieve something, we must study it first and get our hands dirty, learn and fail, fail and learn, so eventually we become the people we have to become to achieve those goals.

What are you feeding your mind with in 2017?

What books will you be reading in 2017?

Who do you have to become in 2017 to achieve your goals?

How many books are you going to read so you gain the skills to achieve your goals?

A close friend of mine says:

“I always look for a job or opportunity that challenges me and teaches me new things, because the day I am not learning I feel I start to die!

What are your goals for 2017? Feel free to share them with me, if you wish; if not, take a look at them and ask yourself these questions:

What do I have to do to achieve this goal?

Do I have to read about it?

Do I have to study it?

Be honest with yourself and find the support you need to enable you to accomplish your goals.

Remember:

  • Plants need CO2, water and nutrients from the soil,
  • Animals need food to survive and thrive,
  • Humans need Oxygen and nutrients to survive and thrive,
  • We need to exercise to remain fit and strong, and
  • Our minds need knowledge to become more creative, imaginative and thrive too.

Let me ask you one last time:

What are you feeding your mind with in 2017?

Drop me a message in the comments box and let me know what books you are reading in 2017.

One of the books I am going to be reading in 2017 is The Alchemist, by Paulo Coelho; although, I read this book almost 20 years ago, I feel drawn to read it once more.

 

Till next time,

Jorge

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Just Another Year, Or Is It?

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Before I get carried away writing today’s blog I want to take the opportunity to wish you all a prosperous, fabulous and above all love-filled 2017.

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Some people say the year gone was but a rehearsal, others even say that this year is going to be THE year, this is the time when we claim our lives back, our power and once and for all we get to be excellent.

If you are like me, I am sure you may have even said this yourself.

The sobering and scary truth is that no single year, ever is a rehearsal, once that time is gone, once those 365 days are gone, that is it.

I used to be really good at maths, and every now and then I like to use it (just in case what they say is true, use it or lose it!!!).

Ready?

In a year, we have 365 days, 52 weeks, 12 months, 8,760 hours, 525,600 minutes and 31,536,000 seconds.

We are only getting started…

So, if you live in a Western country, in average you will work 40 hours (which translates into 8 hours per day, based on a 5-day working week), you will be entitled to at least 2 weeks holidays, plus any other public holidays (which I am ignoring, as they vary from country to country!).

If you are fairly “normal” you will sleep a minimum of 6 hours per night, you will spend a couple of hours eating and getting ready, a couple of hours getting to and from work (let’s not take into account traffic and other natural phenomena), you will probably also have a couple of hours of leisure where you do your own thing (to remain sane).

For those of you who are parents, I will give you 2 hours to help your children with homework and any other things you might do with your children daily, like putting them to bed, chasing them around the house, etc.

Also, let’s add 14 hours per week for house chores, shopping, etc.

Are you with me so far?

This is what we have so far, weekly

Work: 40-Hours

Sleep: 42-Hours

Eating: 14-Hours

Moving around: 14-Hours

Leisure: 14-Hours

Children: 14-Hours

Chores: 14-Hours

If we wanted to see this daily (based on 5 days) this is what I would look like:

Work: 8-Hours

Sleep: 6-Hours

Eating: 2-Hours

Moving around: 2-Hours

Leisure: 2-Hours

Children: 2-Hours

Chores: 2-Hours

If my calculations aren’t wrong this is how much time you have left at the end of each day: 0!!!

Are you surprised?

You probably aren’t and neither am I!

You might be asking what happens with the other 2 days?

You end up with 16 hours to catch up and get on with whatever didn’t get done during your working week, which very strangely these days is: more work!

If you are not at work, you are either thinking of work, that you might lose your job, thinking of changing jobs, maybe even starting your own business and next thing, it is time to go back to work.

Why did I do this morbid calculation I hear you say!

I wanted to illustrate why some people never ever get out of the hamster wheel of life.

It is really easy to have dreams and hopes and ideas of what the future may hold; however, if we don’t do something different to what we have always done, we will continue to get the same results, or worse still (if that was even possible!), we may even end up in a worse off position – it has been known, it is happening around us all the time.

Was 2016 a trial run for 2017?

Did you say the same about 2015? And 2014? And 2013? And the last 10 years?

What have you been doing with your time?

Did you know that for millennia we have done whatever we could to make ourselves look younger, to travel back in time, and simply put to have more time.

Time is the only resource that is not infinite to us, once a day has gone that is it, it is gone forever, it will not come back, it is part of our past and memories.

Also, let’s be honest, the only form in which it comes back to us is as regrets, the ‘what ifs., the it ‘could have beens’, and ‘the cowardly only ifs’!

What are you going to do differently this year?

Me, for starters, I have had a serious conversation with myself, I sat myself down and I asked myself the question: Jorge, what do you want in 2017? Really, for real, what do you want?

My question to you is what do you want to accomplish in 2017?

At this point, I want to highlight, I have not used the word “change” on purpose because I believe that in order to get what we want in life and achieve our goals, change isn’t what will get us there, it is by transforming and evolving what we already possess that will make the difference.

Let me explain this further…

When we are working towards a goal, it isn’t by changing or forcing change that we will get the results we desire.

On the other hand, if we look at what we have and ways in which we could move things around, shift things (and this includes our thoughts), evolve things to be more effective and efficient we will be motivated to move in the direction of our goal, rather than fighting it because it is something we don’t want to “change”.

Have you set aside some time to plan the year ahead?

For the last few years I have taken the very first day of the year to set my goals for the year ahead, I do my wheel of life and look at the areas of my life that need improving and write my goals around them.

I look at my fitness and wellbeing, my relationships, my spirituality and finances and compare them to the previous year.

Then I ask myself the following questions:

What went well?

What worked?

What didn’t work?

What can I do to make it better next year?

And this gives birth to the strategies I will use to execute these goals.

3

Do you set aside some time to reflect on the year gone? To ask yourself what do I have to do to get my s – – t done?

Is there an aspect of your life that doesn’t satisfy you?

What is it?

What can you do this year to transform it?

When I look around, especially today, many people will have wasted the most important day of the year. They will be in bed (most of the day) with a sore head and “trying” to figure out what they left behind in the “old” year!

Today is the day when you set your intention for the year.

What will I achieve in January?

What will I accomplish in February (the shortest month of the year)?

What will I have got done in the first quarter of the month (end of March)?

I remember one of Tony Robbins famous quotes:

“The quality of your life depends and it’s based on the quality of the questions you ask yourself.”

2

What do I want to?

Where do I want to be?

When will I have accomplished my goal by?

How can I ensure I get my s – – t done?

How much money will I have in my bank account by the end of the year?

Who do I need to speak to to help me with my dreams?

Why do I want to do this?

What questions are you asking yourself that will empower you to move forward?

Here are some other questions I will be asking myself in 2017

Is that next glass of wine going to help me move forward?

How long will I have to exercise to burn the calories in that kebab?

Will I regret it tomorrow?

What would my mother say?

What will my 90 years old self say about this?

Will I be using this in 10 years time?

Is this enriching my life in some shape or form?

Will I need this money tomorrow?

Who can I help with this?

Do I really want this?

Who am I really wanting to impress with this?

2017 doesn’t have to be the same as the previous years

I believe we all know what we have to do to fulfil our dreams and create the lives we desire.

We all know we don’t have to eat too much or drink till we lose consciousness.

We know we have to exercise, especially as we get older for mobility, flexibility and weight reasons.

We all understand the importance of education and learning. Those who are self-taught and self-educated are the ones who can vouch for it.

If what we did and tried in previous years didn’t work, is there any point in wasting our time, money and energy doing the same? Really!!!

The answer is NO!

Be smart, be savvy, do not rob yourself of the magnificent life that belongs to you.

When I was working out how many hours we have left at the end of each day I was somewhat upset.

I will tell you why I was upset because some people waste the most valuable days and years of their lives hoping that someday everything will be better, that someday that rich man or woman will show up.

They hope that someday they will win the lottery (without even buying any tickets!!!), they dream of someday waking up and realising it was all a dream.

That someday they will be slimmer, that someday they will be X or Y or Z.

Dear friends, I have got news for you…

There is NO someday!!!

Someday is a make-believe messed up idea we created to excuse ourselves. To absolve ourselves for doing nothing,,,

The time to get s – – t done is now, today, this very second.

6

We go through live hoping that someday it will all be better, and then when it comes to our last breath on this planet we spend it regretting all the things we didn’t do, because the penny finally drops that there is no someday.

Do you want to wake up at some point in 2017 regretting you didn’t take action when you could have?

Do you want to end 2017 the same way you did with 2016 and 2015… and 2008… and 2000… and 1995?

Someday is TODAY.

Today is THE day.

5

Today is the day when you say:

You know what I am good enough and I deserve the best in life. Let’s just wake up and grab the bull by the horns.

Do you want to have your own business?

Brilliant. What are you going to do about it?

Do you want to have a salary raise?

Excellent! How are you going to “convince” your boss you deserve it?

Do you want a new job?

Marvellous… What job is it you want?

You get the idea…

At this point I want to stress:

The quality of your life depends on the quality of the questions you ask yourself!!!

2017 isn’t a trial run. 2017 isn’t about change. 2017 isn’t about the same old.

2017 is about action. 2017 is about NOW. 2017 is about exploiting your excellence. 2017 is all about YOU.

Start asking yourself some powerful questions that will help you head in the right direction.

Have a fantastic day.

May 2017 be the best year in your life yet.

 

With all my love,

Jorge

jorge-vence-with-writing

 

 

 

 

Are you standing for the life of your dreams?

Are you standing for the life of your dreams?

Have you ever asked yourself the following question?

Am I being a stand for the life of my dreams?

Just think about this question and answer it to yourself.

However, what is a stand?

A stand (in my opinion) is a solid foundation where you can build and grow anything and I mean any dream and goal and come from it, nothing or no one will come between the person and their goals if the foundation is solid.

Are you standing (or being a stand) for the life of your dreams?

What does it take to be a stand?

You have heard me talk about declaring what you want, setting boundaries, keeping a journal, setting goals, eating healthily, reading, etc. etc., these are the actions someone who is a stand for their lives takes.

When you stand for your dreams you learn to say no to distractions, you do what some people would never even dream of doing, you keep in your mind 24/7 the life you want to create.

What happens when you don’t stand for what you want?

Truth be told nothing happens, you are just daydreaming and “hoping” you will have a magical “breakthrough” and that suddenly life will be “better”.

You do nothing, nothing happens, it is that simple.

I know many people who have dreamed of being a doctor and have made it happen because they were a stand for that dream, equally I have met people who wanted this and that and the other and quite frankly did nothing, they did not stand for their dreams and now they are either “stuck in a rut” or regretting what could’ve been.

Being a stand is much more than just saying what you want or what you are going to do but it is honouring your word and doing just that when no one is watching.

Getting up at ridiculous o’clock so you can read or cook your children’s meal, or plan your goals for the next month.

It is really easy to be applied and disciplined and a real stand; though, it is even easier to do nothing and accomplish nothing.

As ever the choice is yours, you either are a stand for the life of your dreams or you are not.

Till next time, with all my love,

 

Jorge

Are you setting enough boundaries?

Are you setting enough boundaries?

Life is life! This is a fact!

What I mean by this is that life will happen, throw things at us and will distract us, whether we want it or not!

Though, what can we do?

Before I can tell what we can do, I will tell you what most people do, most people just give in! They give up and say goodbye to their future when the going gets tough…

Why does this happen?

I can give it to you in one word, boundaries… people have very few or no boundaries at all!

What is a boundary?

A boundary (in my opinion) is a protected area where we do not allow any person or thing to distract us and take us away from what we want or what we are doing.

When you have boundaries and you say to your spouse between 3 & 5 pm every Saturday is my reading time, you do what you want but at that moment in time I want to read a good book that will help me achieve my goals in life.

Doesn’t it seem simple?

It definitely is, however, most people just have no boundaries whatsoever!

I have a very simple system I learned from a fellow colleague and NLP Trainer, my boundaries system is a traffic light system, it goes as follows:

Red: Do not even think about it (you can knock on my door in emergencies),

Yellow: You may come in, just be polite and knock before you come in, and

Green: I am not busy come and go as you please!

My partner 100% understands this and I am delighted I was introduced to this system to become more efficient.

So, think about it, are you setting the right and enough boundaries to accomplish you goals or simply to have just you time?

Are you allowing yourself enough time and space to think with clarity?

We need our own “me” time in order to become more effective and efficient, we just forget to do it.

Do you have a boundaries system?

I would love to hear from you.

Till next time, with all my love,

 

Jorge

Are you declaring your intentions?

Are you declaring your intentions?

Often I hear people talking about dreams and fantasising what they will do “someday” when they have more time, when they have more money, when the kids are at school or when they have better health…

Does it sound familiar?

To me, it totally does! Simply because I have been there. I have wished and dreamed and hoped, and in the end taken zero actions.

Are you declaring your intentions?

It wasn’t until I learned that in order to accomplish and achieve anything in live we must declare our intentions to the world, tell absolutely everyone we meet what our intentions for our future is.

There are two types of people in the world, those who declare their goals and dreams to the world and those who don’t.

Guess which ones are more successful?

You got it, the ones who tell the world what their intentions are.

See, this is what happens when we tell people what we will be doing in a month or six down the line, people are watching us and they remind us when they see us next… and the next time, and the next until it happens.

What happens when we tell no one of our intentions?

NOTHING!

Absolutely nothing happens if we don’t tell anything to anyone. I will give you the writing of my book Growing Confident as an example, I told every single person I met that I was writing a book in self-help/personal-development and I gave them as much detail as possible and even publishing dates, etc., etc.… and it happened just like that, the very same way I described it to everyone.

Now, can you see the power of declaring what you want with the world.

I can give you another example, I am working on a second book in the field of personal development, I have been “working” on it for months, though I haven’t told anyone about it and guess what? I haven’t made much progress because I haven’t declared… Though I am declaring my second book will be published by the end of the year.

You want something to happen, you can 100% make it happen if you declare to the world and tell every single human being you come across.

I would love to hear about you and those occasions you have declared to the world your intentions and how you got on.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

Whose advice should you listen to?

Whose advice should you listen to?

 

Would you take advice from your uncle who has been broke from as long as you remember? Or,

Would you take advice from Sir Richard Branson?

We go our day to day life listening to people near us, who are just like us and they have somehow resigned, this is it, this is my life and there is nothing I can do about it.

They mean well, though, their fears are controlling their every action and they are passing that onto whomever they meet or come across.

Can you see where we are heading here?

Who should I listen to?

You remember I wrote a blogpost recently about Being a student of what you want to achieve? One of the things I forgot to mention in that blog is that it is 100% valid and acceptable to find a mentor in that area we want to succeed at.

I will give you my personal example, when I decided to change careers people said I was mad, that I was going into an industry I knew nothing about, I was told there was no market for it, that people didn’t invest in themselves, etc., etc.

BTW, before I forget those naysayers are called “dream stealers”!

Now, going back to what I was saying, I decided to ignore those people whose lives were in similar or worse position that mine at the time; I just said, thank you for your concern but I will make my dream come true.

I got busy reading, studying and meeting people who could help me achieve my goal. I chose to ignore those who were close to me because they were in no position whatsoever to advice.

Who are you listening to when making decisions?

Who is shaping the way your future looks?

Who is in control of your actions?

Because let’s face it, many people say they are independent and the truth is that there is a whole entourage of people dictating how they should or shouldn’t live their lives.

Take advice and listen to those who can enrich your life, add value to what you working towards and believe you me, your future will be the one you want.

Just get to work, embrace those opportunities (which we can me too!) and take full control of your life.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

How “lucky” are you?

How “lucky” are you?

 

Today I want to get rid of the myth “luck”.

How many times we hear people saying that such and such are lucky, or beginner’s luck; or people saying YOU are just lucky!

Really?

I am not even going to bother looking the definition of luck because it simply doesn’t interest me AND also it takes any power away from you.

You don’t like being powerless, do you?

What is it then?

I believe with every cell in my body what takes you the success you achieve in life is OPPORTUNITIES!

How many times you’ve heard that some people were at the right place, with the right people at the right time?

What we don’t hear is that not everyone takes action under those circumstances.

All of these factors, time, people and location are just opportunities… the beauty of opportunities is that we either take them and embrace or we don’t!

That’s it!

It really is that simple, there isn’t such thing as luck.

What we have at every single second of the day is opportunities that we either take or we don’t.

In any career there are various elements that can take you to the success you desire, location, education, time, people, money, etc., however, what truly makes the difference is you, and how you respond to what is being presented or available to you.

With this in mind that’s why personal development and having a coach to work with are key and extremely important because they enable us to see our blind spots and help us see an opportunity when we are presented with one.

So, what I want you to take away from today’s post is that there is no such thing as luck, only opportunities that we either take or we don’t…

Also being “lucky” is a very passive way of going about in life and embracing opportunities is empowering and gives you the control over your life.

How cool is that?

With all my love,

 

Jorge

PS, if you have an area of your life where you are lacking confidence and want to achieve incredible success get in touch and take my 30-mins Free Consultation.

What do you think I should do with my life?

What do you think I should do with my life?

What do you think I should do with my life?

How often have you found yourself in that situation, asking someone what should you do with your life?

Be honest!

I have and many times…

I often hear people asking me or others:

What should I do on my free time?

Where should I go on holidays?

What should I eat?

What should I wear?

What should I drink?

What movie do you recommend?

Do you get the picture?

Are you constantly looking for someone else’s opinion and approval?

One of the reasons most of us, and I include myself, seek for a third party validation or approval is because we are afraid that we may make the wrong the decisions.

What if I told you that there aren’t any right or wrong decisions or experiences for that matter!

Everything we do, every action, every task, every decision brings with it a learning lesson.

When we are growing and evolving, learning from what we do is crucial to be able to embrace challenges and achieve our goals.

It doesn’t matter what you do or you don’t do even, you are always learning.

Let me explain this further.

Let’s say you start a new business venture, you are a novice at businesses and quite frankly you know very little about what is required and what do.

You will make mistakes, you will soon learn that you ideally should have some skills relevant to what you want to do, that you will need to outsource some people to compliment you with skills you don’t have, you might even need to re-educate yourself about your industry.

Once you dive in and embrace the experience you start to learn what works and what doesn’t work, either way you are learning.

Or, you might start doing some learning before you start, again, you are learning, you will read what works and what doesn’t work, what to do and what to avoid.

Also, if you do nothing with your life, talk about doing things and never do anything, you will learn or realise that you didn’t utilise your time efficiently.

You see? You are always learning…

Do you need someone’s approval or permission?

NO!

You do not need anyone to tell you what to do or not do!

You are powerful enough to make your own decisions and whatever the outcome own to it and learn from them.

At this point I would like to clarify, when you are employed or in any environment where there is a figure of authority there is an agreement that you will follow some guidelines! I just wanted to clarify that!

What I mean is in your life you call the shots, it is your life, no one else’s.

You want to know where the best holiday destination is? Go and explore as many as you possibly can, then you will learn where is the best place to do.

You want to know who is the best author? Read as much as you can and decide for yourself.

You see? It is up to you to choose what is and what isn’t worth learning.

You are strong and powerful, don’t forget it.

Give yourself permission.

Till next time, with all my love,

 

Jorge

How do you find your own potential?

How do you find your own potential?

 

Tough one, huh?

Have you ever asked yourself this question: How do I find my own potential? Or, How can I tap into my hidden potential?

Before I help you figure out how this is possible let me share my story with you…

About me

I come from Panama City, from the suburbs, from a pretty poor and rural area, all I knew was scarcity, poverty, negativity, prejudice and a host of not so nice things.

I would be lying if I said these didn’t affect me, they totally did.

My parents had to count the pennies to put food on the table, they had to leave early, come back late and then there was far too much month at the end of the paycheck.

There were two children, bills, travel expenses and all the other things that life throws at you; work, very little time with the children and almost no hope.

We would hear gun shots, we’d be told some had been robbed, stabbed, someone’s house had been broken into or worse someone had been shot.

That was all I knew…

Even with all of these things, I was fortunate I had parents who did their best to provide for us, sent me and my brother to school to one day have a better life, we were hope for them, and by that I mean, we were the evidence that even poor people if they worked hard at it they could achieve great things.

Sadly, I grew believing that only “rich” people could do and achieve things in life, any hope I ever had would be crushed almost immediately by the things I saw and would hear about.

Life was a challenge for me because I was in a very “macho” community, surrounded by catholic people and I was battling with my sexuality and my feelings towards the same sex.

I had hope, then I had nothing; I would find it again to then have it taken away by the fear and belief that I wasn’t good enough because I was gay.

I had all of that for the first 16 years of my life. Then, I tried to commit suicide, thankfully I was given a second chance to live my life!

Everything changed the moment I opened my eyes, I felt there had been a shift and I was ready to find a way and the means to create the life I knew I deserved.

How can you find your own potential?

Easy!!!

The only way you can find your true potential is by waking up to the fact that you are capable of achieving whatever you set your mind to.

I will repeat it:

You are capable of achieving WHATEVER you set your mind to.

Whatever? I can hear you say…

Absolutely yes!!!

Let me explain this further, the only thing that stops us (see how I include myself) from accomplishing a thing or things in this life is ourselves, our mindset, our attitude, our philosophy and lack of positivity…

In my former years (life even), I had a negative attitude, I was putting myself down because of my sexual preferences, because of my background and because of what was happening around me…

I was approaching life negatively.

When I changed my mindset, the way I saw myself and my life, everything changed, yes EVERYTHING!

9 months after attempting to commit suicide I met the person who loved me more than I loved myself prior to meeting him. 2 years after meeting him I moved to England, and now my life is beyond recognition.

That 16 years old who didn’t want to be alive once would be blown by the fact that he became the successful man he is today.

If I was able to turn my life around, so can you…

This is the truth as to how you find your true potential, by waking up, snapping out of the pity party you have been in and change and shift your mindset to that of I can, I am worth it, I will do it, I am doing it and I am making it happen.

Wake up, change your mindset and outlook in life, get to work and do what you said you’d do and voila! There you have it, your potential.

That potential that hadn’t been tapped into will be reached once you believe you have it in you.

Let me tell you, you have it in you, just reach deep inside you and bring it out.

I didn’t know I had it in me till I sank to the bottom, hit rock bottom and had to go through hell.

I am telling you, you got it, just bring it out, bring it forth and start creating the life you know you deserve.

One of my hero’s Jim Rohn says:

A life worth living is a life by design!

You are the creator of your life, you get to call the shots, no one else!!!

Go out there and get to work, design your life and honour your potential.

Till next time, with all my love.

From my heart to yours,

 

Jorge

Be a student of what you want to achieve

Be a student of what you want to achieve

 

What do you want to achieve?

What do you want more of?

Before I started my journey in the personal development I used to walk in life “aimlessly”, wanting this and wanting that and not getting it!

I used to ask myself this question:

What am I not doing?

Where am I going wrong?

I am so happy I chose the career path I chose because I learned where I was going “wrong”.

Are you ready for it?

I wasn’t studying what I wanted to achieve or become.

Let me give you an example of what I mean: I wanted to be singer and cinema star (and this is real BTW!), yet I never ever had formal singing or acting studies.

So, how could I be an international singer or a Hollywood actor without any formal studies?

If I don’t know how to use my vocal cords accordingly and how to read music would I be able to achieve that dream?

I wasn’t hanging out with any musicians or singers and learning from them.

Am I building the picture for you?

What will becoming a student of my chosen career/goal enable me to do?

There are many reasons why we all should become students of our chosen career/goals, here are some of the most important reasons:

  1. You will learn what work for those before you, everything in life is a recipe, a system we follow and it is that simple, when we read other people’s stories and successes we know what they did to get where they are. Success leaves clues!!!
  2. You will learn what didn’t work for them, don’t do it!!!
  3. You will develop a similar mindset to achieve your goal, you will learn to think the way they did to achieve their goal.
  4. You develop a belief in yourself and your goal, having a belief in what you are doing is so important to make it happen.
  5. You will save time, money and energy!!!

The list isn’t exhaustive, there some other benefits to reading/studying what you want to achieve.

In my particular experience I have learned to study success, authors in personal development and successful coaches who have been in the industry before me and are still going.

It is very likely they have learned what to do and what to avoid, so that experience is very valuable for me, they have developed a system and that is of interest to me.

Remember success leaves clues, we can only access these clues when we become students of that which we want to do or become.

We are blessed that there are countless resources available to us to help us achieve what want to accomplish…

In the end, how much do you to achieve that goal? For real? How bad do you want it?

When we REALLY want something we find the time, money and energy AND the resources to learn from…

I hope you have enjoyed today’s post, please comment in the comments box how you have benefited from becoming a student of your chosen career or if there has been a goal you were working towards and you studied it to get similar results.

Or, the opposite how not studying your career has affected you?

Till next time, with all my love,

 

Jorge

Stop It!

Recently I was told about Bob Newhart’s short video Stop It.

A ladies goes in with her fear of being buried alive in a box.

He hears her and then replies I will share two words with you, she waits for these two words and gets her pen and paper willing to get the “solution” to her problem. 

The two words:

STOP IT!

“You don’t want to get buried alive in a box? Stop it!”

She shares other “issues” with him and the two words are repeated, Stop it!

This video shows how simple it is to let go of bad habits/behaviours and fears…

All we have to do is to STOP THEM… STOP IT!

Things however, change when we hold on to them… we call this secondary gain. 

What is secondary gain?

Secondary gain is when we hold on to something like depression, anxiety, bad habits, etc., because we get something from them. 

For example if we are “depressed” and suddenly we start getting a lot of attention from people and people we hadn’t seen for months or years come back to our lives, we will (unconsciously or consciously) do what we can to keep them near us. 

Same applies to other things we do, we do them because they keep us safe or in a place where we want to be and  “changing” would take those things away from us (or at least that’s what we think would happen).

Is there something you want to achieve in life? Though, something holds you back?

Can’t you stop it?

If you can, STOP IT!

If “change” is not on your radar or you can’t stop it, is there a secondary gain?

I would love to hear your comments in the comments box.

Till next time,

Jorge

PS Stop it!

The Discomfort Zone 

The Discomfort Zone 

Time and time again we hear people talk about the comfort zone and that the magic happens outside it.

Though, what is outside the comfort zone?

What we find outside the comfort zone is the discomfort zone.

What is the discomfort zone?

The discomfort zone is the area where we grow, expand, learn and push ourselves to new realms. 

Should we remain in our comfort zones?

If you want to continue getting the same results and doing what you have always done, ABSOLUTELY, stay there and carry on like nothing. 

However, if you want to REALLY go for it and TOTALLY transform your life, then the place to visit and venture into is the discomfort zone. 

The truth is that this “zone” isn’t scary or uncomfortable at all, it is just unknown to us.

The only way you can find out what lies beyond what you know is by venturing outside of what you know and experience it for yourself. 

Success and successful people don’t just stay there and wait for things to come to them, they go for them them, step outside their comfort zone into the unknown, their discomfort zone.

I would love to hear what you have learned outside your comfort zone or what is keeping you in it.

Till next time,

Jorge 

Once Upon A Time…

Once Upon A Time…

Once Upon A Time....jpg

Once upon a time there as child who dreamed of crazy futures and who thought anything was possible…

That child had the rare gift of imagination!

In his/her dreams this child could come up with the solutions to this world’s problems.

Absolutely nothing seemed absurd… Trees would become skyscrapers, old metal would be a means of transport, toys and rubbish would be transformed into objects of fascination and inspiration.

Every day and night this child would dream of new possibilities and his/her options were endless. Truly, there were no limits.

One day this child would be doctor, then the next a farmer, and the next a police person, each and every day was a new beginning…

Nothing or no one would stop this child.

Then…

People around the child told him/her he/she had to grow up that these ideas were pointless and they were just silly games.

These comments were repeated time and time again; the child’s feelings were hurt in a semi regular basis.

This beautiful creative child started to doubt his/her skills, what once seemed a possibility was now pure absurdity.

What this child once considered a dream and a solution was but a puerile stupidity.

The child then became a teenager, his/her interests were different, they were shaped by the people around him/her… Or what was expected from him/her!

“Life” got in the way and… this now teenager thought that life, the world and everyone was against him/her.

Struggles followed… doubt had been planted, towards the end of his/her “innocence” those happy yesteryears were but a “blurred” memory.

Adulthood “forced” its way in and… “adult things” had to be done… Go to Uni, get the best marks, get a job, marry, get a mortgage, have a family, work for a lifetime and retire for a fraction of your worth…

This story wasn’t his/her reality, he/she just bought into it and it became his/her reality.

Can the clock be turned back?

Can this child come out of its captivity?

Can he/she dream again?

Can he/she wake up from that long and deep sleep?

Who knows…

Though, what I know is…

That child, that boy, that girl… was you one day, with dreams and hopes which were taken away accidentally (maybe even intentionally) and that child forgot all about it.

Thought, let me tell you, it isn’t too late…

You can still reclaim your dreams and hopes…

It isn’t too late, you just need to wake up, take back what is rightfully yours and fulfil your prophecy…

Your time hasn’t passed, your time starts now…

The End!

Till next time,

 

Jorge

There are two types of people in the world

There are two types of people in the world

There are two types of people in the world

I am a great believer that messages shouldn’t be long, in fact they should be short, concise, to the point and thought provoking…

Do you agree?

I will let think about that one for a while.

As the title says there are two types of people in the world, some people may disagree and that is ok, this is perhaps for those who agree with the message I am going to share.

The two types of people are:

  1. Action takers: these people are on fire, they are on it, they have an idea or goal and they act on it. There is no stopping them, they see their goals through to the end. And,
  1. Talkers: these are people who always talk about what will be, what could happen, what they’d do if things were different, etc.

So, my question to you is, in which category do you fall into?

Are you an action taker and constantly spending your time on the court, playing full out and getting dirty, getting uncomfortable and going for your dreams? Or,

Are you a talker? Just talking about things in general and never really doing a thing, talking how there are “chosen” and “lucky” ones and that one day you will have a breakthrough? Just seating in the stands watching other play?

I would love to hear your thoughts and experiences.

Are there any areas of your life where you aren’t acting but talking?

Please share in the comments box.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

What does the future look like?

I have mentioned in several ocassions I love Napoleon Hill’s quotes and his book Think and Grow Rich. 

There is a quote I refer to time and time again:

Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve. 

What does the future look like?

The answer is very simple: if you can see it and believe it in your mind, you can most certainly achieve it in your life.

The mind doesn’t distinguish what is real and what isn’t real, with this being said whatever you imagine your mind can achieve and bring to the physical realm, whether is a successful future or not.

Going back to the question in the title: what does the future look like?

It looks like whatever way you want it to be…

If you imagine huge success, guess what? If you put in enough action and commitment you can make it happen.

On the other hand, if you imagine a dull and unsuccessful future, you will attract that too.

In the end the future you will get is the one you start creating now, right now, today! 

Also, remember the present you are now living, is the future you once chose.

Till next time, 

Jorge 

How To Become A People Magnet 

Who wouldn’t want to be or become a people magnet?

Everyone! At least at I think so  (if people say now they are probably kidding themselves!).

When I wrote Growing Confident, 10 Simple Steps To A More Confident You, I genuinely thought that I had put down on paper ALL I knew and experienced about confidence.

I am not going to deny the fact that I wake up late at night saying to myself: oh  rubbish, I should have included this or that in the book.

One of these things I wake up wishing I had written was irresistibility and being a people magnet.


What is a people magnet?

I suppose we all have a “preconceived” idea of what a people magnet is or isn’t.

I want to give you my bias, my opinion about being a people magnet.


A people magnet is

A person who walks into a room and light it up, bringing the room and it’s people together to an exquisite climax of fun, laughter and happiness, where everyone will leave feeling better because they were in the same room as that person, and a happy memory has been formed.

People will remember him/her for months, if not years to come because he had that “je ne sais quoi”, that “va va boom” leaving everyone in utter awe.


A people magnet isn’t

A way to manipulate or control others. 

A people magnet isn’t about getting or taking things from people.

It isn’t about personal gain.

On the contrary, it is about giving and sharing, things and themselves.

A people magnet is someone who empowers others and loves them for who they are.


How can I become a people magnet?

Being a people magnet is much easier than what we think.

A people magnet is someone authentic, genuine, honest, caring, giving, non-judgemental, respectful, tactful, polite, interested, a good listener and patience.

These are some of the qualities I use to describe a people magnet.

Here is one other thing I have “rediscovered” about people magnets, after reading Brené Brown’s book Daring Greatly, is that people magnets are not afraid of embracing their vulnerability.

In order to be a better person and become a people magnet you have to be 100% vulnerable and open.

When you are vulnerable and open (without being naive), people see your authenticity and your rawness, which is a magical quality that cannot be faked or mimicked, it comes from a place of total acknowledgement and respect for who you are.

People magnet – My example

I didn’t know or ever realised that I was a people magnet till I immersed myself in personal development.

In one occasion I was welcoming the New Year in Aberdeenshire, my partner and I had been visiting a friend and we were his guests to a house party.

My partner and I didn’t know anyone, there were a few dozens of “strangers” there; though, I didn’t let this stop me or scare I smiled to everyone and introduced myself to many people as I could.

I made eye contact, smiled and showed a real interest in the people I was meeting.

Needless to say that by the end of the night I had spoken to everyone and people had acknowledged how comfortable they felt with me and they also felt they had known me forever.

What did I do?

I was open and vulnerable, I wasn’t afraid of showing I was interested in getting to know them and learning from them.

Other tips to be a people magnet

Be humble, not a “show-off”.

Be confident, not arrogant.

Be you, not someone else.

Being a people magnet and our energy

It all comes down to energies, frequencies and vibrations.

In order to be a people magnet we have to be aware of the enegies/vibrations we put out.

When we radiate love and care, we attract that back to ourselves.

When we give out hope, respect and trust, we get that back too.

Being a people magnet isn’t difficult at all, it simply takes bringing most of our fears and barriers down and showing our real selves.

Being present and genuine are key to become a people magnet too.

I hope you have enjoyed today’s post.

Why not follow me on here, so you are one of the first ones to read my posts.

Till next time,

Jorge

PS I would love it if you shared your comments in the comments section.

The Napoleon Hill’s Quotes That Revolutionised My Life

The Napoleon Hill’s Quotes That
Revolutionised My Life

The Napoleon Hill's Quotes That Revolutionised My Life (13)

We all have a favourite author or person we resonate with and their words tend to have an impact in our lives.

After reading Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich, I became obsessed with him and his philosophy and I got hold of whatever I could on Napoleon Hill.

These are the 12 Napoleon Hill’s quotes that revolutionised my life and my world

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I am glad this man came up with such wisdom because I feel he summed it up succinctly and eloquently, that his words have withstood the ages.

Comment in the comments section and let me know which one of these 12 quotes is your favourite, or if it isn’t on here share with me.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

PS Share these quotes with your family and friends so they too are touched, moved and isnpired by Napoleon Hill’s wisdom.

How SMART Are Your Goals? – Download

How SMART Are Your Goals? – Download

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We have all heard of SMART goals, do they really work?

Of course!

Setting goals is what enables people to achieve more in life, whether it is a personal goal or a fitness goal, it doesn’t matter.

When you have a vision and a detailed plan of action, anything seems possible; whether it is making a fortune or having the holiday of a lifetime.

Having goals is what makes you to go out there and do whatever it has to be done to accomplish them.

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What are SMART Goals?

Let’s assume you don’t know anything about SMART goals

SMART in SMART goals stand for:

S – specific

What do you want? In detail! Do not spare any detail, be as specific as you possibly can.

M – Measurable

How do you know you have achieved it, what is the evidence? Ideally make it sensory based, use all of your senses in the evidence.

A – Achievable

Can it be done? Has it been done before? Do you know anyone who’s done it?

R – Realistic

Can you do it? Do you have the skills it takes to do it?

T – Time-framed

How long will it take you to do it? Can you break the goal down into smaller parts? Break it down into smaller mini goals if the goal is too “big” and set a deadline for each mini goal.

Why do people fail even when they set goals?

The reason why goal setting doesn’t work for some, if not most, people is that they do not set SMART enough goals and they are also ill-formed (baldy made goals).

People fail because their goals aren’t specific enough, they don’t know what they want, they can’t see it in their minds.

People set unrealistic goals, in the hope that they may “magically” accomplish them, not having a clue how they will do it nor what it takes to do it.

Lastly, people do not set a deadline; again, they hope for the best and praying that it just happens.

When we don’t sell SMART goals, it is like going for a drive without a map or a route, driving aimlessly without a final destination in mind and getting frustrated along the way because we don’t know when we will get there.

Side effects of not setting SMART goals

  • Waste of precious time,
  • Waste of precious resources,
  • Waste of energy

Do you want to become a goal accomplishing machine?

Start setting SMART goals, writing them down and seeing them through to the end.

It helps speaking to people about them and also having an accountability buddy to remind you of what is important to you.

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Also download the SMART Goal Sheet to start setting new goals.

Why not share this post on social media so your loved ones become goal accomplishing machines too!

Click here to download your SMART Goals Sheet

Thank you for reading.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

Daily Affirmations For Every Occasion 

Daily Affirmations For Every Occasion

Following on yesterday’s post about affirmations I wanted to share with you some of the affirmations I use on a regular basis.

Again, an affirmation should be personal and relevant to you; so, if the ones you read here don’t resonate with you, it is ok, no need to worry about it, just use them as a reference and come up with your own.

You can say an affirmation about any subject, about anything, they simply are mantras we say to ourselves to positively influence our inner game and thought process.

I have taken the liberty to write some affirmations in 7 categories I find are relevant and important to many of us, these are: Career/Business, Finances, Health & Fitness, Spirituality, Relationships, Family, Friends.


Affirmations


Career/Business Affirmations


My job brings me satisfaction and joy, and it makes a huge difference in the world.

I am doing my best at what I do and the results speak for themselves.


I am happy and delighted to follow my heart’s desire every day.

Finances Affirmations


My current financial circumstances are evolving and the evidence is in my bank account.

I am abundant and wealthy and money is plentiful.


The universe looks after me and my financial needs, I am blessed.


Health & Fitness Affirmations


My body is strong and I have endurance to take on any physical activity.

I am at my ideal weight, I am healthy and fit.


I love my body just the way it is, I am blessed I can see it, feel it and hear it.


Spirituality Affirmations


I am surrounded by spirit and it guides my every move.

God blesses me on daily basis, he always looks out for me.


My heart and my soul are filled with love and every person I meet is a brother or sister, I have so much love to give.

Relationship Affirmations

I am blessed to have a partner who loves me and treats me with respect.

I am attracting the perfect person to spend the rest of my days with, we are meant to be.

My relationship is strong and based in truth and loyalty. 


Family Affirmations

I respect my family and they respect me back, we live harmoniously and lovingly, caring and looking out for each other. 

I have the best siblings in the universe who are loving, caring and giving.


I am blessed to have loving, healthy and empowering parents.


Friends Affirmations


My friends support my every endeavour and respect my choices.

A stranger is a friend I am yet to meet, I treat them with love and respect me, and they love me and respect me back.


The human race is formed of billions of beautiful people who are caring, loving and giving, and I feel safe in their company.

I hope you have enjoyed today’s post and please share it so everyone you know starts to feel the benefits of using affirmations on a daily basis.

Why not comment and share your favourite affirmation from the list above or your own.

Till next time,

Jorge 

9 Things I Learned From Using Affirmations On A Daily Basis

9 Things I Learned From Using Affirmations On A Daily Basis

9 Things I Learned From Using Affirmations On A Daily Basis

You might or you might not be familiar with affirmations; either way, it is ok as I will share with you what affirmations are and 9 things I have learned from using affirmations on a daily basis.

An affirmation in simple terms is:

A positive message we tell ourselves to empower ourselves.

How do you create an affirmation?

There isn’t a right or wrong way to say an affirmation*; though there are some guidelines:

  1. It should be stated in the present,
  2. It should be positive, and
  3. It should be meaningful to us.

*If you are familiar with Goal Setting, you will notice that there are some similarities; affirmations are very powerful when paired with our goals.

These are the 9 things I have learned from using affirmations on a daily basis:

  1. It has allowed me to understand that I can create endless and infinite possibilities in my life.
  2. I have learned that by saying my affirmations daily and out loud I am able to picture myself achieving my goals.
  3. I have learned that my language has a powerful impact on how I see my reality.
  4. Saying affirmations in front of the mirror first thing in the morning, or before an event helps to relax me and to focus.
  5. Affirmations have helped me reprogramme some of my limiting beliefs around my goals.
  6. I have learned that having a daily ritual helps to keep me in the right track.
  7. I have learned that I am in control of my outcomes.
  8. I have learned that I can share with others my deepest desires and wishes, and make them part of it.
  9. I have learned that saying an affirmation out load I am declaring that I am committed to create the life I want.

Each and every day brings new opportunities and it is up to us whether we embrace them or not.

I have found that having tools that empower us is a great way to head towards those opportunities with open arms and give them our best.

Have you used affirmations before?

Care to share what you have learned from using them?

I would love to hear from you, feel free to comment at the end this post.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

Forgiveness – The Missing Link In Success?

Forgiveness – The Missing Link In Success?

Forgiveness – The Missing Link In Success-

You might be wondering what has forgiveness got to do with Success?

I used to ask myself the same question a few years back, to then realise that success was just our emotions properly and powerfully focused and channelled.

What happens when we hold a grudge?

To answer this question, I would like you to imagine a car’s windscreen and rear-view mirror, covered by a thick layer of dust, grime and rust.

As the driver you want to go from A (where you are) to B (where you want to be), do you think that you will be able to move rapidly and at a speed that will get you to where you want to be on time?

The answer is pretty obvious, isn’t it?

Of course not, you will have to wash the car, you will have to remove the thick layer of dust, grime and rust, so your vision isn’t clouded or distorted.

Holding a grudge against someone is exactly the same thing, the “negative” emotions you hold towards someone or something mightn’t let you go at the speed or velocity you want to in order to achieve your goal.

Please note how I haven’t mentioned the engine, which in our case is our mind, we have the intention to accomplish something, though the dust and grime (our emotions) tend to get in the way and sometimes even hold us back.

How can we release these negative emotions and move forward?

In my experience and that of clients too, when we forgive someone these “negative” emotions are released and we are capable of moving forward, there isn’t anything weighing us down and we don’t feel guilty for working towards our goals, or we don’t let our ill-emotions drag us down.

Our actions and thinking comes from a place of love and hope and we attract positive outcomes and people our way.

Three ways to release our negative emotions and achieve our goals:

These three methods I am going to describe next, I would like you to imagine as metaphoric carwashes, whereby we remove the thick layer of dust, grime and rust that is preventing our “car” moving in the right direction.

  1. Speak to the person or people you hold a grudge against: being “vulnerable” and honest isn’t a bad thing, it takes courage and bravery, and when you say to someone: we had our differences in the past and so far I don’t think we have “completed” this situation, please forgive me or let me explain why I did what I did.

By doing this you are taking a huge weight off your shoulders and any “negative”                   emotion will disappear over time, enabling you to move on.

  1. Write a letter to someone, whether alive or not: often speaking to someone from our past can be challenging, so writing a letter can be the best way to go about it.

If the person isn’t with us any longer, you can burn and close that chapter of your                   life.

However, if the person is still alive, sending the letter would be the best way to go                   about it; if you feel you can’t you can burn it too or keep it till you feel ready to send               it; though, the important thing here is to “rid of” any ill-emotion.

  1. Seek professional help: often when we work on ourselves by ourselves we ignore out “blindspots”, so, having a professional work with us and shine the light in areas where we didn’t know we needed “help” is the difference that makes the difference.

It isn’t uncommon for us to be “delusional” about the way we feel and our actions,                what a professional does is tell us the things we normally don’t like to hear, so we                  have a real breakthrough and achieve our goals.

When we finally let go of old “grudges” and negativity, then we can start to work on a clean canvass and start to create new possibilities for ourselves.

If we don’t, then it doesn’t matter what we do or how much we achieve, we will always feel the same way, and nothing will change that, until we do something about it.

If you’d like to find out what some of your “blindposts” are, why not take my 30-mins FREE consultation.

I hope you have enjoyed today’s post.

Till next time, with lots of love,

 

Jorge

Balanced Life – Impossible?

No man is an island, said someone once.

Like many people I have the need to feel valued, loved and spend quality time with a companion.

I am blessed to have in my life one of the most charismatic, caring, admired, loved and respected partner.

We are both in business for ourselves, which means sometimes we don’t get to spend much time together.

Birthdays, anniversaries, parties and other social engagements take a secondary part in our lives.

Our businesses, clients and some times our business partners come first.

However, ever so often, we find ourselves spending a weekend together; unfortunately, our diaries take over those weekends and we have to make some ‘tough’ decisions.

Though, there have been some ocassions where I have asked myself the following question:

What is more important my business or my relationship?

I take a deep breath and answer it with as much honesty as possible.

To find the answer I have to go deep inside my heart.

When I do this, a voice deep in me replies: “your relationship is the more important thing.”

I then take a look at my schedule and drop things than can be done at any other time.

So, this weekend has been one of these weekends we get to spend together, and our diaries and schedules have other priorities other than ourselves.

Instead, we both dropped everything and decided to spend Sunday together.

We had a lunch date and talked and laughed and did what most couples in business “forget” to do, which is to have fun and enjoy each other’s company.

For those of you who read my blog regularly, you will know that I like to do it daily and write about what inspires me at the time.

I am not going to deny that at times, today, I was thinking I better get to work and write today’s blog, to then be tempted back to sofa and enjoy some cuddles.

Eventually, we both agree we would do some work and reward ourselves by going to the cinema to watch ‘Ab Fab’.

What have I learned by putting me relationship first?

I have learned that I can be successful and work hard and make the time to spend with my partner.

I have discovered that by making small changes in my schedule I can make remarkable “improvements” in my relationship.

I have learned that being in business doesn’t mean I have to “neglect” my partner.

I have learned that it is moments like these that can help bring a couple together and create new happy memories.

Also, and perhaps the most valuable lesson I have learned is that you will make time to spend with your loved ones when you want to, no matter what.

Are you finding that balance in your life?

Are you spending enough time with your family?

Or,

Are you married to your job/business?

Till next time,

Jorge

The “C” Word

I bet you are wondering what I mean by the “C” word? 

I am not referring to its naughty use nor am I referring to cancer but the other “C”…. “commitment”!

Before I tell you a bit about committment I would like to give you my definition of commitment: 

To get things done in despite of your doubts, or yourself. 

A few questions for you to reflect on:

How committed are you in to YOUR life?

Or,

Are you the in and out kind of person?

Are you committed or not? 

Are you afraid of the “C” word? 

Are you the non-committal type of person? 

What is it about the “C” word that scares you the most or is it your own fears? 

The truth is like anything in life in order to understand how the “C” word can work for you and what it can do for you, you have got to embrace it, accept it, and channel it. 

Jim Rohn once said that in order to be good at something you must study it first. 

Are you a student of commitment?  

Are you studying it? 

Do you know that commitment comes through practice? From one act of commitment to the next and the next and the next … and so on!

Depending on what you want to achieve in life your level of commitment will vary.

Your commitment to find a new job won’t be as great as the commitment of starting your own business. 

Equally, your level of commitment will determine your level of success… period!

Are you still aftaid of the “C” word? 

Are you ready to embrace it and take control of your life? 

In the end, as always, the choice is yours. 

Thank you for reading and till next time. 

Jorge 

PS A huge thank you to my partner Martin for typing this down, as I was driving us to a wedding in Gloucestershire.

Modern Stress Management – Stress To Success

Modern Stress Management – Stress To Success

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It isn’t uncommon to hear someone we know talk about stress in their lives, how stressful work is, their boss is stressing them out, etc.

Stress doesn’t differentiate gender, nationality, race, political views, creed or age; everybody will experience one form or another of stress at some point.

Before I go into what Modern Stress Management is, I would like to give you the definition of stress:

“noun

  1. pressure or tension exerted on a material object.
  2. a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or demanding circumstances.

verb

  1. give particular emphasis or importance to (a point, statement, or idea) made in speech or writing.
  2. subject to pressure or tension.”

For the purpose of this blog post I will be using this definition, “stress is a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or demanding circumstances.”

Regardless of where in the world you are, the likelihood is that your emotional and mental state has been strained from adverse or demanding circumstances; either right now, as you read this blog post, or at some point in the past.

In my personal experience of having been under “stressful situations” in the past and my knowledge as a Modern Stress Management Facilitator and Trainer, stress is just a story we tell ourselves…

I will repeat that again, stress is just a story that we have repeatedly told ourselves and have become our “reality”, and in some cases our “identity”.

I know this idea may contradict what you know and what you have experienced in the past, about stress.

To illustrate this, I will share with you the story of 2 twin brothers.

I can’t remember the original source of the story, and I will not claim me as mine either.

The story goes as follows:

There were 2 twin brothers and they had an alcoholic father, who did nothing for them and drank himself to death.

Years later, one becomes an alcoholic and follows on his father’s steps.

The other, became very successful.

They were both asked what drove them to become an alcoholic and a successful man?

Their answers were as follow:

The alcoholic twin replied: my father was an alcoholic, what did you expect?

The other replied, my father was an alcoholic and I didn’t want to be like him…

The moral of this story is that at some point in their childhoods the alcoholic twin made the story up that because he was the son of an alcoholic he would never be successful or accomplish anything in life.

He went in life looking for the evidence that he wasn’t “good enough”, that the future wasn’t bright for him, that he would never amount to anything and his actions and results backed it all up, until they became his reality and who he was.

The successful twin conjured a different story that he’d not follow on this father’s footsteps and that he’d do the complete opposite to his father.

They made different decisions and choices, under the same or very similar circumstances.

Why?

Because they chose to either thrive and survive or to being defeated and become a victim.

The successful twin would perhaps use different language than his brother and he’d made a seemingly “stressful situation” into a growth and empowering experience.

What I am trying to say here is that “stress” and let me stress it, is that stress is a choice!

We choose to either be under stress and stressful situations or not!

That is it!

Stress is a made up feeling/sensation (and please forgive me if this contradicts your view of the word!) to hold ourselves back!

If stress was really that bad, there wouldn’t be as many athletes, there wouldn’t be as many successful entrepreneurs and business people; in fact, there’d be no human race at all!

It’d be too stressful!!!

Stress or, as I personally like to refer to it, growth opportunity (remember the athletes? Who stress and exhaust their muscles, so they grow) is what we make of it, what we choose it to be, it is the story we tell ourselves about ourselves, the world and our capabilities.

When I was a teenager and I was under incredible levels of “stress”, I was choosing that story, which then became my reality, which then drove me to attempt to end my life.

Guess what?

The day after I attempted to commit suicide, I told myself a new story, which I will share with you.

The story I told myself the 28th of March 2000 was, maybe I didn’t die for a reason…

That alone was a paradigm shift, a new story was created and with that many possibilities, the one I chose?

I chose to empower people and help people who are in a similar position to the one I was almost 2 decades ago.

I chose empowerment over stress.

You might be wondering what my life had been like if I’d chosen stress over empowerment.

I can tell you:

I would have declined the help I was offered by people around me, I would have continued taking antidepressants (numbing my emotions and feelings), I would have not come to terms with my sexuality, I might even have tried to commit suicide again or I would have lived a very sad and empty life, where I would have blamed everyone for the rest of my life.

I would have said I was stressed at all times and I would have chosen a different life altogether.

Can you see my point now?

Why I say that stress is a choice, it is a made up “feeling” to keep us down, prevent us from growing and we play the victim card.

I didn’t learn this overnight, I had to go through the motions to be able to learn about stress and how to “fight” it, conquer it and overcome it.

I am extremely fortunate that I chose empowerment over the “other option” and I was even luckier that I came across Modern Stress Management which has totally revolutionised my world and my outlook in life.

Modern Stress Management is a cutting-edge set of Energy techniques which enable us to thrive and evolve, create the life we always dreamed of and to come out of “stress” once and for all.

If you want to become a “master” of self-help and have a set of tools and techniques to enable you to “tackle” stress and its “side effects” and at the same time you want to grow and evolve, and take control over your affairs why not join my Stress to Success webinar series?

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The Stress To Success webinar series will start on the 6th of September 2016 for 12 weeks covering methods to “conquer” stress and become the person you always knew you could become.

Register now as the spaces are limited.

For more information, visit: http://www.jorgevence.com/webinar-series/ or feel free to email me: jorge@lifecoachsouthampton.co.uk.

Remember the spaces are limited, and if you don’t want to miss out register now and save money too.

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Till next time,

Jorge

PS If you’d like to become a Modern Stress Management Facilititator visit this link, http://eft-training-uk.co.uk/index.html or contact me.

GOE_Modern_Stress_Management_Course_2016

Power v Fear

Power v Fear

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What is driving your behaviours and responses?

Is it power?

Are you being empowered to take action?

Or,

Is it fear?

Are you being disempowered and held back?

Going back to what I have mentioned a few times in the last blog posts and that is the “stories” we tell ourselves.

Are you telling yourself negative and poisonous stories about yourself, the world and your abilities?

Are you feeding that “inner gremlin” that “rules” over your life and actions, or lack thereof?

Or, perhaps,

Are you telling yourself positive and empowering stories about who you are, the world you live in and your abilities?

Are you silencing that “inner voice” and “create” a new possibility, a new story that empowers you and your actions?

In the end, the choice is yours.

Do you choose power over fear?

Do you choose fear over power?

Either way, you are in control.

Till next time.

With all my love,

 

Jorge

PS, don’t forget to like, comment and share.

Are You Ready To Declare And Claim Your Success?

Are You Ready To Declare And Claim Your Success?

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What is holding you back?

Are you achieving the results you want out of your life?

There are many myths around success, and the one I like to clarify the most is:

Anyone can achieve success.

Anyone! I mean anyone.

When I was growing up I felt, or at least I thought, that because I wasn’t “straight”, or because I wasn’t “attractive”, or because I wasn’t “white” that I didn’t deserve success.

That was the story I repeatedly told myself and guess what? It became my reality.

I know, it is easier to speak about it now; however, when I look back I was looking at my life through a clouded filter that distorted my reality and the way I saw the world; therefore my results and my success.

Nowadays, I am able to see things more objectively and at the same time I like to inspire others to “go for it”, that the stories we tell ourselves can be transformed and made to work on our favour rather than against us, to empower us and get the results we want.

All it takes is to declare that we want to achieve success in any area of our life and claim it back, “go for it” and make your dreams come true.

It is as simple as 1, 2, 3.

  1. Make the decision to want to improve your current situation,

  2. Declare what you want and commit to it, and

  3. Do not give up until you get what you want in your life.

I feel honoured that I help people break away from “old” and “disempowering” habits, beliefs and paradigms because we all deserve greatness and the best in life.

All we have to do is to awaken to the fact that we can have anything as long as we put in the time, energy and effort it takes to accomplish our goals.

Do you want to achieve your and live the life you know you deserve?

Get in touch and take my 30-mins FREE consultation to get you in the right path.

Don’t forget to like, comment and share.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

Time To Act

Time To Act

Time To Act

Before I get started I would like to ask the following question:

Do we overcomplicate everything as human beings?

The reason I ask this question is because the more I learn about human behaviour and from personal experience and that of clients, “we” tend to overthink and overcomplicate things.

We live in a society where pretty much everyone wants to excel and succeed at “something”, whatever that something is to them; though, they don’t go for it, they let fear take over them and control their actions.

I know it sounds a lot easier said than done, and all it takes is to take action.

We want to achieve a goal, we do whatever research, homework we have got to do and then get to work.

It really is that simple!

I understand that we all have fears, concerns and hesitations at first; and sadly we let these control us and we end up procrastinating or we don’t even get started in the first place.

I want you to understand that what has to be done first is for you to give yourself permission to go for it.

Once you give yourself permission get to work, and fulfil your dreams.

It is time to act, right now!

If you are “stuck” and you want some “guidance”, I welcome you to contact me and take my 30-mins FREE consultation, you’ve nothing to lose and a lot to win.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

What Do You Want Out Of Life?

What Do You Want Out Of Life?

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At first when you ask someone the question:

What do you want out of life?

It would seem a simple question; though, the truth is, it isn’t, it is far from easy to answer. I have known very few people who have a laser focused vision of what it is they want, they are very rare people, indeed.

Although, I have learned that to answer this question you have to understand one thing and one thing only.

What am I referring to?

What I mean is, to be able to understand what you want out of life you need to know that you can have anything.

It is that simple, when you know and realise that you can have anything, you realise that you are able to say what you want out of life much easier.

Let me explain this to you further.

If you don’t know that you can be the president of your nation you will not be able to see it as a possibility.

However, when you know that you can be the president of your nation/country, you will feel inspired to take the necessary steps to fulfil that dream.

You will join a political party, you will become a minister, you will want to be elected as the leader of the party and so on…

Until one day you go for it and you get to be the president of your nation/country.

The same applies to becoming a scientist, teacher, zoologist, veterinarian, doctor, lawyer, author, etc.

Is this easy to accomplish?

I wish I could lie to you, and the answer is YES, it is “easy” to accomplish.

Though, because of the stories we keep telling ourselves and unaddressed “traumatic” and “hindering” experiences, we see this as out of our reach.

It isn’t difficult once you understand it, you can have anything you want to as long as you give it the time, effort and energy it requires.

So, what do you want out of life?

Write it down and go for it.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

PS, don’t forget to like, comment and share.

Memoires Of A Suicidal Teenager – Part 3

Memoires Of A Suicidal Teenager – Part 3

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The morning after the night before arrived, too early if I am honest.

I used to start school at 7 AM, which meant I had to be up 4.30 AM to be out of the house for 5.15 and arrive at school any time between 6.15 and 6.30 AM.

I woke up feeling guilty and ashamed, I had failed at something that “seemed easy” and was “important” to me; not only that but once my mother found out I would be in trouble and she would think even less of me.

My routine started as usual, getting out of bed for 4.30 AM or earlier; I felt nauseous, the taste of pharmacy hadn’t escaped my mouth, the vacuum in my heart seemed greater than it had been the day before and I felt lonelier than ever.

I was a walking “zombie”, I looked like death, I smelled like a pharmacy and I was numb, physically and emotionally; no one seemed to “notice” anything different about me, my teenage classmates and other peers were too “busy” in their teenage lives to be able to realise somebody else’s “drama”, my drama!

I felt “invisible”, I felt “dead”; although, I hadn’t succeeded, the difference between been dead and where I was was that instead of being 6 ft under I was walking among the living.

Hey, Mr Vence, what’s up with you? This husky voice shouted at me…

I stood still, wondering if there was someone talking to me? It took me sometime to register it, when I did I turned around and glanced in that direction.

What’s up with you, it repeated.

Crap, I thought!

I avoided the biology teacher, sadly it was in vane; there was no escaping.

Hey, what’s up with you I asked!

A bit of background about my biology teacher, she was a cat and dog lady, loved by some students, hated by others; equally admired by some teachers and hated by others.

She would arrive first thing in the morning (and again late at night) to feed the dogs she had rescued; she would encourage her students to recycle cans and the money would go to good causes in the school itself and to feed the dogs at school. Simply remarkable!

Judith Atencio, was intense, in your face, loud, and very, very perceptive.

Why haven’t you brought your urine samples to the lab classes? (Apologies, it sounds pretty graphic but it was for an experiment).

Oh, I forgot I muttered as I started crying.

What’s the mattered with you? She asked with concern in her voice.

I tried to commit suicide yesterday and I failed, I feel disgusted, ashamed and guilty.

Her first reaction was to ask if I’d been to hospital to which I replied negatively.

She advised me to go, I simply declined.

We chatted for the duration of the break.

I felt relieved, I felt I had taken a massive weight off my shoulders. Though, I had promised myself to keep what happened as a secret, I needed to talk to someone, I had to release that “evil spell” out of me.

The day went better than I had anticipated, no one saw me different, no one could “guess” I had tried to commit suicide, I was making it out to be much bigger than it actually was.

That moment of honesty opened my mind and my heart to a new realm of possibilities. I just didn’t know it.

For the first time in my life I had been honest and it was “healing”, I was able to say I needed help and I didn’t die in the process, even when I had done so the day before.

I started to see a tiny spark of “hope” emerging from this situation. I didn’t know what would come out of it, but I went from wishing I wasn’t on this planet to wondering, what IF there is something else, something “better”, something “bigger”, what if I am supposed to grow stronger from this situation, what if, what if, what it…

It would be a massive lie if I said my life “changed” straight away, I could still feel the sinking hole in my chest, I felt unloved (even if someone had shown they cared), I felt alone (even when there were thousands around me), I felt vulnerable (when in fact there were many who were truly vulnerable), I felt shame and guilt (when I wasn’t the only one feeling it).

The 28th of March was the day of a new beginning, a new beginning of what or to what, I had no idea, I only knew that I didn’t die and the options were pretty slim, I either chose life or I chose the other option.

Had I changed? Had something changed? Who knew…

I was clear about one thing though, I was not going to be the priest’s prisoner and I was not going to be a victim.

How was I going to accomplish it? I had no idea, nor did I care, I had the desire to make it happen.

I had found someone who was willing to listen, and it got me thinking, were there others willing to listen and help me too?

I hope you have enjoyed today’s blog. More blogs as part of Memoires of a suicidal teenager are to follow.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

Are You Living In A Vicious Circle?

Are You Living In A Vicious Circle?

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Have you ever wondered if you live in a vicious circle?

Do you keep making the same mistakes over and over and over again?

Do you keep asking yourself the question, will I ever learn?

Do you feel trapped in a hamster wheel?

If you answer yes to any of the last 3 question it is very likely you are living your life in a vicious circle.

What is a vicious circle?

A vicious circle (and please notice this is my take on it), is a never ending behaviour or lifestyle that quite frankly gets us nowhere.

To simplify this concept imagine you want to make £1M and you go to brainstorm and come up with money making ideas.

You come up with amazing ideas and you start to execute them and the moment you come across the first obstacle you quit.

Though, the idea of you wanting to make £1M is still there, so you go and come up with some more ideas, and the same happens for a second time and a third and a forth and so on and so forth.

That is the easiest way I can find to explain what a vicious circle is.

Or, as Einstein once said: Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expect different results.

Can I come out of a vicious circle?

Absolutely yes, you can.

It only takes commitment and work, and not just any work but personal work and tons of integrity.

What is integrity?

Integrity in the most simplistic definition is doing what you said you were going to do, keeping to your word and seeing things through to the very end.

Examples of vicious circles?

Yo-yo dieting, in and out of diets, waiting for the newest and most cutting edge die to come and hope for the best.

Career changing, going from job to job or career to career, hoping that you will land in the ideal career or job at some point.

Serial dating, going from relationship to relationship in the hope to find Mr or Mrs Right, without giving any of the relationships a real chance.

Can you think of what your vicious circle is?

How can I put an end to a vicious circle?

Putting an end to a vicious circle is easier than it seems, you have to understand that a vicious circle when something happen (normally in the first 6-10 years of our lives), we create a story around this event and we will go on to reinforce this story by constantly looking for the evidence to prove it right.

For example, if you scratch your dad’s car and you create the story that you are a bad boy or girl, from that moment on you will look for the evidence to confirm you are a bad boy or girl; creating conflict, getting into trouble, bad grades, etc., etc.

So, what needs to happen is for you to understand what happened (the event/memory that originated the whole vicious circle), figure out what story you told yourself and collapse it, get rid of it.

Finally, you will have to “put your money where your mouth is” by keeping to your word, i.e. be integral about what you do and do what you say you are going to do.

Once you overcome this vicious circle you empower yourself to create new possibilities, new options and ways of being.

I hope you have enjoyed today’s post and feel free to share what your vicious circle is.

Don’t forget to like, comment and share,

Till next time,

 

Jorge

Truth

We live in a lie and a fabricated story of ourselves and our lives.

The truth is:

We are whole, complete and perfect.

Things happen in our lives and we fall into a vicious circle, whereby we look for the evidence to make what happened into our reality and continue to perpetuate that “false” reality.

How can we come out of it?

By being honest and realise that what happened isn’t who we are, it isn’t our reality.

It sounds simple, and it is; it only takes a bit of practice.

Remember, you/we are whole, complete and perfect.

I hope you have enjoyed today’s post.

Don’t forget to comment, like and share.

Till next time,

Jorge

Memoires Of A Suicidal Teenager – Part 2

Memoires Of A Suicidal Teenager – Part 2

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I have no recollection of what happened after 2pm on that Monday, I slept deeply without a care in the world. For all I knew I was gone, dead, deceased!

Anyhow, I was done with it. What was the point in caring about a world and life that have turned their backs on me.

Suddenly, at around 10 minutes after 7 pm, just 5 hours after what seemed the best decision I had made, I was shouted at and shaken by my mother.

Jorge, get the hell out of bed and go to the corner shop, NOW.

Little did she know of what I had done. She was so blinded by her own “stuff”, that she didn’t even know I was on antidepressants, let alone that I had swallowed them all.

I would be lying if I said that coming round was easy, I was confused and startled, I didn’t know how long I had been out for, it seemed days if I am honest.

Though, the first thought that came to my mind was: crap! I didn’t succeed.

I can’t even do this right, I muttered to myself.

What do I have to do to get this life over with?

I can’t take this anymore. I want out, I don’t belong here, I am better off under the ground, rotting away and feeding the worms which seem to be of more value to humanity and I ever will.

In my confusion I left for the corner shop, I was floating in the air, I couldn’t feel my legs, I was totally numb.

I had a disgusting taste in my mouth of narcotics, it almost left as if I was a walking pharmacy, same smell, though the taste wasn’t as appealing.

Noone knew what I had done. That was my secret. The only witness I had was 8 years old only and he didn’t seem bother about anything. He cared more about our next door neighbour than anything else in the entire world.

I would take this to my grave, which would be real soon I said to myself. I am going to succeed no matter what, just wait and see, I will keep trying till I make it happen.

Upon arriving with the groceries, which to be honest I had no idea what I had gone for, nor how long I had gone for, nor do I remember any exchange of money, I couldn’t think straight.

Oh poop! I remembered that earlier that day (before I filled myself with courage to do what I did), I had given my word to a classmate that I would go to her house and give her a hand with some biology.

Everything seemed a blur and I did my best to “blag” it and help her understand the subject. I think I helped her somehow. Even, when deep down I was the one needing help the most. Though, I kept it to myself, that secret was mine, mine, mine and no one would make me talk, over my dead body only.

One thing I can say never changed, during this odyssey, was my love for food.

From very early on I was known for being a “foodie”, everyone knew that the way to my brain was through my stomach.

I am sure they called a “food prostitute” behind my back!

My classmate/neighbour made me a fried egg sandwich, to say it tasted like hell is an understatement, I couldn’t differentiate any flavours, everything tasted so disgusting, like a mixture of sewer, rubbish and chemicals all blended together!

Once I did my “good” deed, I left for my house, hoping to be murdered on my way back to my mother’s house.

I arrived in one piece, feeling worse than I did earlier in the day. My mother and I were barely speaking; my brother was caught in the middle of it all, his father had left a few months earlier, leaving him careless.

I went to bed praying, praying to God: if you are real take me now, I have had enough.

I went to bed praying, praying to Satan too: if you are real, take me, take my soul now, it is yours, no sacrifice required, I am volunteering it to you.

I cried myself to sleep, hoping, wishing, wanting to be gone forever.

Keep tuned in for more blogs about memoires of a suicidal teenager.

Till next time,

Jorge

Why should I choose to be a better person?

Why should I choose to be a better person?

It may seem a simple question at first, but when you look deep into it, this question may cause some resistance in some people.

Here are some of the reasons why we should choose to be better:

1. As clichéd as it may sound, there is enough negativity on this planet that choosing to be better can help transform this negativity into positivity, helping everyone along the way.

2. Being better than we were previously can attract nicer people into our lives, if you believe in the law of attraction, when you change the way you behave, things start to change for the better in your life.

3. You become a go-to person, what this means is that people will come to you for advice, your mindset and outlook in life inspires people to trust you more, you become their role model.

4. You start getting better results. This simple mindset shift has then potential to detach you from the outcome, which means you will be more open to feedback and as a direct result better outcomes.

5. You stress levels decrease, nothing worries you as much, because you know you get to choose how you react to events in your life.

6. You become kinder to yourself, not only the way you think about yourself but the words you use to talk to yourself.

7. You learn to treat yourself with more respect, and this translates into a healthier and happier lifestyle.

These are the top 7 benefits of choosing to be a better person that I have experienced first hand.

Give choosing to be a better person a go and let me know how your life improves.

Till next time,

Jorge

Do you want to divorce yourself from your limiting beliefs?

In my experience I have found that limiting beliefs are like relationships.

They have been such a great part of our lives that bidding them farewell or “divorcing” them seem a struggle.

Though, what do you when a relationship doesn’t serve you? Do you hold onto it in the hope that things will change and go back to the way they used to use to be?

Or, do you do a “reality” check and figure out a way to “save” that relationship?

At the same time, what do you do when there’s no “hope in hell” that that relationship will he saved?

Beliefs, in this case limiting and disempowering beliefs are the same, if they don’t serve us there isn’t any point in hanging onto them.

If your belief system is dragging you down and isn’t providing you with what you want and deserve, don’t you think it is about time to do something about it?

Do you want to spend the next few years or decades wondering what it could have been like?

Or, do you want to take control over your life and divorce those limiting and disempowering beliefs once and for all?

So you can find and create new empowering and positive beliefs about yourself, your abilities and the world.

Do you want to live unhappily ever after or take the steps towards your dreams and happiness?

Till next time,

Jorge

Memoires Of A Suicidal Teenager

Memoires Of A Suicidal Teenager

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Back in 2000 when I was 16 years old, when I thought life had ended even before it began, I didn’t know there were resources available to me out there nor did I know to whom to turn to, what to do or what to say.

Here is but a summary of the things I felt.

I used to wake up early morning, feeling empty and almost dead, the best way I can describe it is I felt as if someone had taken my heart off my chest and in its place left me with a void, that was what I felt an abyss in my chest which made me feel purposeless and empty.

I couldn’t think straight; it didn’t matter what wonderful things were happening around me I could not get away from the “misery” I was feeling and living.

The lack of friends didn’t help, I felt alone in the world and misunderstood by only one who I thought could do something, my mother.

As you probably will remember, I have said that my mother disowned me; her words were like a dagger that cut deep and through my heart, right into my soul, this is what she said (after finding out I was gay):

“I used to have you in a pedestal, now you are nothing to me”.

Ouch, did that hurt?

It was another nail on that coffin; although, I know she said those words out of desperation and anger, but at the time it hurt pretty bad.

I felt unloved, unworthy and shame and guilt.

I felt unloved by my mother, the one I thought I could turn to; I didn’t see anyone else as family; well I also saw my brother as my family, though, at the time he wished I wasn’t his brother, I wasn’t as “cool” as our neighbour.

I felt unworthy because I didn’t think I was deserving of anything, love, friends, joy, happiness, I had lost if all; in fact, I never thought I had in the first place.

Lastly, I felt shame and guilt, I felt I let my family down for various reasons, for being gay, for having even been born, I destroyed my mother’s hopes for my future, I was ashamed of who I was and what had happened to me.

I lived like this for months.

Though, the “symptoms” of feeling unloved, unworthy, shame and guilt were with me for many years, I just learned to cover them and “pretend” that everything was OK!

Then January 2000 came, this month would change my life forever, literally, I went from feeling “numb” to feeling 100% raw, exposed and totally vulnerable.

I fell in a pretty bad depression, between January 2000 and March of the same year, I was publicly humiliated by a priest I trusted, my mother disowned me and I lost my will to live.

Just in case I hadn’t mention it or that you didn’t know, I fell in love with a priest, and this same priest “kicked me out” of church, made a public announcement saying I wasn’t allowed in church and told my mother I had tried to come on to him; when it wasn’t even true.

I carried that shame with me for months, very few people knew the truth and hundreds if not thousands wondering what had happened.

I stayed away from “his” church and any church for that matter for months, I felt I didn’t belong nor did I want to be there.

Then, one Sunday, I filled myself with courage and decided to go to “his” church and let the world know I wasn’t his prisoner any more.

At the time, it seemed like a great idea; he even seemed glad to see me, I felt even more hurt because he was being nice and pretending nothing had happened.

By this time, I had been on antidepressants for a couple of months, to say they were working would be massive lie, I hadn’t noticed any changes, I seemed to get “worse”.

On Monday 27th of March, I had one of the worst days at high school, it felt as if everyone had turned their backs on me, I felt lonely, sad and even more depressed.

I remembered how the priest had come to me, speaking to me like nothing had happened, and I sank even deeper.

I left school feeling and wishing I had never been born, I had the intention to make it happen, to erase my life from the face of this earth and take with me any evidence that I ever existed.

I got home just after 1 pm, I reached for my antidepressants and stared at them for what seemed a life time, should I? Should I not? Should I? Should I not?

I froze in time, weighing out any positives from my life, to realise that nothing was screaming at me saying please don’t do it, everything and I mean everything was saying do it, there is nothing worth fighting for.

I was ashamed of myself, riddled with guilt, I felt unloved by everyone and I felt unworthy.

I peeled my antidepressants from their packaging one by one, all 47 of them, filled a glass with water and proceeded to count them, as if that would achieve anything.

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I played with them waiting for a sign, which never came, I put all the tablets in my right hand and took them all at once, without hesitation or guilt, and I did this in front of my younger brother, who probably thought I was playing.

Little did he know that I wasn’t playing a game, but playing with my life instead!

For the first time in my life, I felt in control, I was in charge and I didn’t regret my decision, I was about to put an end to what I had lived by then.

So, at 2 o’clock on that Monday afternoon I went to sleep hoping to never wake up.

I will share more about my story in future blog posts, stay tuned in.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

How Do You Want To Be Remembered?

How Do You Want To Be Remembered?

How Do You Want To Be Rememered- (1)

A simple question, hey?

How do you want to be remembered?

I remember the first time I was asked this question and to be honest I didn’t know what to say, I was clueless.

In fact, I would say not many people would know what to say if asked this question.

The more I get into personal development and the more I read and write and work with my clients for confidence and success the more I use and hear the word, legacy.

A legacy is leaving our mark on this planet for years after we have gone.

If you aren’t a Spanish native speaker you mightn’t know what my surname means, Vence literally can mean two things: to expire (not really the meaning I want TBH) or to conquer (that’s more like it!).

So, after 2000 when I learned to be kind to myself, to accept myself, to dream and to love myself and I started to say the following mantra to myself: Your name is Jorge Vence and it has been given to you for a reason, so honour it.

I did and continue to do just that (after 2000 obviously).

Also, you might know this old Latin quote: “Veni, vidi, vici” (“I came; I saw; I conquered”) which is popularly attributed to Julius Caesar.

In my early 20’s I decided to take a few months off and go travelling, I wanted to see the world and have fun.

One of the things I did (which I hope must people do) was to send a postcard to myself back home and they would read: To Jorge Vence – Veni, Vidi, Vici – From Jorge Vence.

From that moment I decided that was the way I wanted to be remembered.

I want people and the world to remember me for how I touched their lives, how I left them feeling better than before they came to me and met me; how I saw the world, its magic and made the most of every second of life given to me and lastly, how I conquered my fears, my worries, my doubts, my limiting beliefs and how I kept going, till the very end.

This I want to be my legacy to the world.

I want to share a couple of things with you, my surname was given to me by my step father, great surname to be given TBH (Gonzalez is a bit overrated!).

The other thing is my surname, originates from France from the French Riviera, in a small walled city just outside Nice, which I have been blessed to visit.

Perhaps, you will remember how we tell ourselves stories about ourselves and the world and anything, really.

Just the very fact that I learned that the real meaning of my surname wasn’t to conquer but something else didn’t stop me from telling myself that my surname is a reminder of what I am meant to do and achieve in this life.

So, the way I want to be remembered and what I want engraved on my tombstone is as follows: Jorge Vence, Vini, Vidi, Vici, lived his life to the fullest and truly honoured his surname.

How do you want to be remembered?

What will your legacy be?

What do you want engraved on your tombstone?

Please let me know on the comments section.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

 

I AM A Dreamer – Dreams Do Come True!

I AM A Dreamer – Dreams Do Come True!

I AM A Dreamer

I am a self-confessed dreamer.

I love closing my eyes and dreaming of magical destinations, a wonderful life, perfect work, great friends, and an incredible future.

Although, you may not know this but that wasn’t always the case with me.

As a child in a Latin country I grew up believing that what I had was everything I deserved and those who had “more” were the “chosen ones”, the “lucky ones” and only they could travel the world and have all the fun.

For years I saw this as my reality, I mean I saw the evidence all around me, poverty, lack; surely my parents and relatives were not wrong!

I remember watching the TV as a child and teenager and believing that only white people with blue eyes and suits and amazing accents were destined to be rich, famous and successful.

I kid you not, I believed this most of my younger years, because that was what the media made me believe and it confirmed what my parents were telling me.

So, 1999 came along and I wanted to do something different, I was poor, I had no friends, I was a very unhappy teenager and to top it all off I saw myself as the ugliest person on the face of the earth.

My life was doomed, I thought it was over the second I came out of my mother womb.

Going back to 1999, I decided to join my neighbours to take my Holy Communion as a means to make friends and reconcile my sinful soul for being gay; and this is not any for or sarcasm I truly felt disgusted at myself because I was poor, I had no friends, I was unhappy, was ugly and I was gay.

Could life could get any worse?

Being poor, friendless, unhappy, ugly and gay was enough, I would say; though, clearly it wasn’t.

I don’t want to bore with the too many details, I am just going to give you the really short version of the story, while going to church I felt in love with a priest who ended up kicking me out of church and telling my mother I was gay, oh and let’s not forget he also publicly humiliated me in front of thousands.

You see what I mean?

So, I was poor, friendless, unhappy, ugly, gay, I was disowned by my family and publicly humiliated…

It gets worse though, I was poor, friendless, unhappy, ugly, gay, I was disowned by my family and publicly humiliated and I felt in a really bad depression.

That wasn’t it, there is more. Can you believe it?

I was poor, friendless, unhappy, ugly, gay, I was disowned by my family and publicly humiliated, I felt in a really bad depression and I tried to commit suicide to top it all off (no pun intended BTW).

Once I got all of that out of the way I woke up to hope, I was fortunate enough that I had great mentors who helped when I needed it the most, the appeared almost as if by magic and my incredible of healing and loving began.

I started to dream once again, I learned that life is whatever you make of it, life is truly your oyster, there are countless opportunities, we just need to recognise them and seize them.

So, the moment I started to dream again everything changed.

It sounds too good to be true, but is true.

From that moment on, I started to see myself like this:

I am abundant, I have all the friends I need, I am happy, I am beautiful, I love my family regardless, I forgive and let go of my past, I love myself and I say I yes to life.

This was all possible because I started to dream again, to dream of a better life, a future and possibilities.

As crazy as it may sound everything changed for the best within months, 9 months (pretty much to the day) I found love; 2 years later (almost to the day) I found myself in a place I always read about and saw on TV shows.

You want to know something crazy, the place where I moved to was full of blond people, with blue eyes and nice clothes and they aren’t all rich, famous or successful.

Funny that, hey?

I hope you have enjoyed today’s blog post and please share it with your networks, comment, like it and why not subscribe to my newsletter too.

Remember, it is OK to dream, it is fun and dreams do come true.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

He Who Dares Wins

I came across this quote in a book a while back and it had a great effect on me.

“He who dares wins”

The way I see this quote is as a call to action.

If you don’t do anything you will not get anything.

On the other hand if you dare and go out there and do something that scares you every day, you are likely to win.

So, I decided to print that quote and laminate it to glue it on my bedroom door.

Whenever I feel like uninspired by looking at that quote I remind myself that it is very unlikely that I will win if I don’t dare, if I don’t go out there and do something to make my dreams come true.

Are you daring enough?

Are you getting the results you want?

Till next time,

Jorge

10 Simple Steps To Grow Confident

When I was a teenager I never ever even consider that I could be of any help to anyone.

I felt like “fish out of water”, I thought I was unloved, I felt unworthy and I lived in shame and with guilt!

I would be lying if I said life was easy, on the contrary it was pretty “challenging” and I didn’t what to do or of a way out.

Many things happened at once and I couldn’t take it, I didn’t have the skills, knowledge or support to overcome my “issues”.

So, one day when I had enough I decided to end it all, unfortunately  (not really), I couldn’t even do that right!

I was woken up hours later after an OD, and I was confused I didn’t know what to do next.

I had been depressed for months, if not years and I couldn’t face life, I had given up.

Suddenly, a conversation with a teacher helped see some hope and without realising I followed 10 simple steps to grow confident.

These are steps I share in my book Growing Confident, 10 Simple Steps To A More Confident You.

These simple steps helped me get out of the “hell hole” I was in.

So, these are the steps I took:

1. I choose to be a better person,
2. I was curious,
3. I healed my past,
4. I learned from my past,
5. I modelled people’s confidence,
6. I acted as if I was confident,
7. I was open,
8. I told my story to the world,
9. I shared my gift with the world and,
10. I made love my number 1 priority.

I go on much of detail for each step on my book, which is available here https://dragonrising.com/store/growing_confident/.

If you are “lost” and feel like I once felt I highly recommend you get a copy of the book now and work towards the life you deserve.

This book is a personal story and journey and it is full of exercises to truly help you grow in confidence.

Till next time.

Jorge

Meeting a “stranger”

Recently I attended a CPD event to hear people in my industry and how they have evolved.

It was a great experience being in the audience and learning from people I already knew and people I hadn’t met before.

They day was packed with so much learning and at the same time we had a good laugh, presenters making fun of themselves and interacting with old friends, which is always good.

There was a lady whose presentation blew everyone away, she had such energy, enthusiasm and passion.

She was teaching something I wasn’t very familiar with, which I found fascinating. One of the things I liked the most about her was her drive and vision, as well as her humility.

At the beginning of her talk she asked everyone for feedback, which I found inspiring, what better way to grow and learn than hearing from you audience.

I am a bit of a “revel”, so rather than writing it down as she requested, I decided to give her the feedback face to face…

At first I just wanted to give her the feedback and leave, I had no other plans.

The universe had other plans for us, we started talking as if we’d known each other for ever!

We were the last ones to leave the room, just before I left to catch my train she had to go to the ladies, I offered to look after her belongings , and upon her arrival she said: do you want to go for a pint?

What can I say? Those words were music to my ears.

We decided to go for a meal and something to drink too.

The moment we arrived to the restaurant we started to talk about everything in general.

Then the conversation became much more personal, about challenges and failures and relationships.

I felt totally honoured to have spoken to his beautiful person for many reasons, I felt trusted, I felt I was able to help someone.

I learned many valuable things from this “random” meet.

1. It doesn’t matter how “successful” we think people are, they will always have something that troubles them.

2. It is ok to open.

3. A beer and a meal can lead to many incredible conversations.

4. The best gift we can give any one is to be there for them and listen to them.

5. It is true that a “stranger” is a friend we don’t know just yet.

I also shared intimate things with this person to reassure her that it is ok to feel like that and to be honest it felt great to be able to have an open conversation without worrying about a thing.

Are you giving those “strangers” you meet daily a chance to listen to you or for you to listen to them?

If not, give it a go you might find a BFF.

Till next time,

Jorge

Do you need a good kick in the butt?

Do you need a good kick in the butt?

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I am serious, do you?

I, totally, need a good kick in the butt a lot more than many people imagine.

Being self-employed, an entrepreneur requires a lot of discipline, a shift in our mindset has to be made, we are just not “aware” of this; in fact, many of us have an “employee” mindset, it is almost as if we are “programmed” to be an employee for life…

(I feel like screaming, the idea of being someone’s employee doesn’t resonate with me anymore; I can’t stand the idea of fulfilling someone else’s dreams and being told how much I am worth!).

Thankfully, I have the most amazing partner who gives me a good reality check when I am having a “day off” (those days aren’t pretty BTW); what does he do? He pulls the covers off me (that should be a crime!) and points at some of my favourite quotes laminated and posted on our bedroom’s door.

It works, though, other times it takes a lot of effort.

Why is this?

I wish I could lie to you, and I won’t, the reason it takes a lot of effort is because I have no one to make me accountable for my actions (can you relate to this?) and those rare occasions I get myself an accountability partner/buddy, it just falls to pieces, why? They aren’t scary enough or I just simply don’t have enough “respect” for them to see it through to the end (have you ever been in that situation?).

It isn’t uncommon, it is more common than what you think.

Don’t forget success is like an iceberg, we only see the results and rewards, we don’t notice the hard work and tears people endure to get there.

Why am I sharing this with you?

Because I am selfish…

Let me explain this to you. I am from Panama, I am 100% Latino when it comes to pride and letting someone I don’t know down or someone I respect and hold dear. I have no idea why that is, it is just one of those things I know and don’t understand at the same time.

So, my solution to this “issue” is, I have created a Facebook group called: Accountability – Zero BS – Group, https://www.facebook.com/groups/1772237096328497/.

Why have I called it so?

To be honest, the answer is very simple, we are ALL full of it, full of BS.

When we are working towards a goal, target and we don’t have someone on our “case”, the likelihood is that we will tell ourselves stories as to why we can’t or won’t achieve that goal, we will compare ourselves to other people, we will compare our skills to other people’s; in fact, we will create the most “amazing” stories to sabotage ourselves and our success.

Having a why, a clear vision, a purpose is simply NOT “enough”; people spend a lot of money to be held accountable for their actions, they are often part of more than one Mastermind and work hard to be worked even harder by others.

It, just, simply pays off.

What do I want you to do?

Just, join the group and find an accountability buddy/partner to work towards one goal, have an agreement that they will hold you accountable for your every action or lack thereof.

I want you to make use of this FREE platform, group to make your dreams come true.

It doesn’t matter whether you want to quit your job, get a salary rise, find a new job, eat healthier, get a six-pack (that is one of my goals BTW); each and every one of these goals are equally as important, because they are important to someone.

Some goals take no time, others take much longer to achieve; though, when you have a accountability buddy/partner you are more likely to complete your goal much faster than if you’d done it alone.

It is a win-win scenario.

All I ask of you is to join the group and get to work, find someone you feel “comfortable” or “uncomfortable” working with and make it happen.

I look forward to welcoming you in this group and hearing about your successes.

See you real soon,

 

Jorge

Are you up for a “Challenge”?

Are you up for a “Challenge”?

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If you are reading this blog post it is very likely that you are someone who is focused, determined and you want to get better at what you do.

I may be wrong; it is just a hunch!

So, are you up for a “Challenge”?

If you are a solopreneur, entrepreneur, mumpreneur, business person you will understand the importance of visibility on the web nowadays.

Just a having a website does not “cut” it anymore, your tribe/audience, prospective clients want to see you and hear from you on an almost “semi-regular” basis.

We are ALL emotional and social beings and we “need” that interaction.

This being said, blogging is a great way of communicating with that audience, and did you know that most of the world population is “visual” (it is their preferred learning style/system) and have an attention span lower than that of a “goldfish”!

I am going to confess I am one of these people who are visual and whose attention span goes out the window within a couple of seconds. I find reading a “chore” most of the time (which you can probably gather by the length of my posts around 1 A4 page). At the same time, if I hear a video that “grabs” my attention I will watch to the end.

However, I have learned that making our presence more visual and interactive we are more likely to get a better response and connect with our tribe even better.

When we write people hear our voice through their filters and experiences, which means they don’t know us for Adam (we are just this person in their heads), nor can they really see what we are all about.

Though, things are very different when people see and watch us, they get to see the “real” us, they buy into our personality, charisma and “energy”; they get to learn from us, they see what we look like, what we sound like and whether we are authentic.

In my personal experience I have received better feedback and got more success from videoing, or vlogging as they like to call it nowadays.

Why is this?

The best answer I can give you is that when I vlog, I am myself, and people resonate with that; I am far from all “polished-up” or perfect, I am just natural and relatable when I speak. I am “normal” in a nutshell.

People like that, people see that we are just like them and they get to like us, know us and trust us, which makes offering our products and services much easier because they “feel” they “know” us already.

So, here is the challenge.

I have started a 45-days vlogging challenge on a Facebook group – https://www.facebook.com/groups/600820326760314/ – anyone is welcome to join this group, whether you are in business or not, whether you are an experienced vlogger or not, whether it is in English or not, it does not matter… and it is FREE!

Why 45 days?

I decided on 45 days because if we did 7 days, 10 days, 21 days or even 30 days, many of us do our very best to see it through and then we stop and we go back to what we used to, nothing!

Once I read in a book, The Miracle Morning, that days 1-10 are unbearable, days 11-20 are uncomfortable and days 21-30 are unstoppable. Though, if after 30 days you stop, it is very likely that you might not continue with that “habit” you have worked for for a whole month.

It is said that a “habit” takes anything from 21 days to 49 days (or even more), this is not taking into account any limiting beliefs or decisions, fears, traumas or lack of action.

Are you committed to your business, product, service or you just want to get more comfortable vlogging regularly?

Join the group now, it has the main purpose to create a community of support and encouragement and we get to learn from each other. It is a no-brainer.

Why am I doing this?

That is a good question! Kidding…

I am doing it because as a Coach I understand the importance of being made accountable for our actions, having support and creating new and empowering habits.

I am FAR from “perfect”, I do need a good kick in the butt (too) pretty often and creating this vlog to “get over myself” and sharing my message, brand, products and services with as many people as I can, is just what I need, and maybe what you need too!

So, what do you say?

I look forwards to accepting you in the group and watching your videos.

Till next time,

 

Jorge

NEVER Surrender, NEVER Give Up

NEVER Surrender, NEVER Give Up

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Today has been all about my partner and I, nothing beats the feeling of spending time with your beloved, your better half, etc

We drove for hours and even stopped at Lymington in the New Forest, as my beloved partner wanted an iced lolly, LOL!

The day was perfect in so many ways, perfect day and perfect company.

Upon returning home, we agreed we’d do our “own stuff”, i.e. emails, calls, etc.

Though, I wanted more time with my partner; so, I lured him and encouraged him to watch a film with me, cuddling up on the sofa.

The film we chose to watch was Suffragette, with Meryl Streep, Helena Bonham Carter and Carey Mulligan.

To talk about having a vision, courage, determination and drive to achieve a goal would not do these women any justice, they were true pioneers and visionaries who believed in a better world and boy did they succeed?

This film, which I highly recommend you watch, is a beautiful homage to those women who fought for their rights and being able to vote, like men did.

Pain, suffering, injustice were not uncommon in those days, mothers were being forced out of their homes and out of their children lives because they were seen as crazy, embarrassing and shameful to their families for fighting for a cause that was much bigger than them.

As I have said, I loved every second of the movie and every second spent in my partner’s arms (sorry for being so graphic here, I am a romantic at heart and I love every second we spend together); though, I always find ideas about mindset and success in whatever I do, even in my sleep!

There was one scene in particular I found poignant and the soul of the movie, that was when the character played by Meryl Streep is about to flee and she looks at Maud Watts (played by Carey Mulligan) and looking at her in the eyes she said: never surrender, never give up!

I felt goose bumps and my heart almost skipped a beat. No better words could have been chosen to inspire those women fighting for their right to vote, just like men did.

Hours of planning, working twice as hard (for a fraction of the salary paid to men), mothers, carers, suffering beatings, being jailed and their faith did not quaver, not once did they see quitting as an option.

Then, this thought invaded my head: when did we learn to give up and surrender?

I mean, young children witnessed that historical moment in 1912, women lived through it and past that moment. I know things didn’t improve dramatically, they got better.

Again, something similar happened in Dagenham in the 60’s (another great film, Made in Dagenham), women fighting once more, this time for equal pay.

Yet, more people forgot about these major milestones in our current history. I am sure there are a few women alive, who lived through both movements and both wars!

So, what has happened?

What has caused our society to surrender and give up on their dreams?

Has it something to do with the current “instant gratification” mindset many have? Or, have we got it too “easy” nowadays that dreaming, striving for excellence and reaching for the stars is not seen as necessary?

I ask you: what do you want from this life? Are you living your purpose?

Or,

Have you surrendered and given up?

If you have, well it isn’t too late to gain that confidence back and start working towards your dreams.

Till next time,

 

Jorge